Photographer
Carlton Chong
Posts: 860
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
I've had serious depression after my GF dumped me (over the phone too!) and it got so bad that I seriously thought about doing the deed. I've never spoken to anyone or mentioned this to anyone until now. Every so often I would get close to someone but I would try and avoid getting too close. Then one day a close coworker of mine did a swan dive off a bridge. Found out that she was sexually abused by her dad as a kid and she never really came to terms with herself etc. and I think she just figured offing herself was the solution. I went to her funeral and I wished I could have spoken to her and told her how many people showed up and how many of them loved her deeply. After that day, I've never came close to thinking about taking my life.
Instead my friend's death has made me want to live. I've turned around 180° and came to realize how short and precious life is.
I certainly hope that anyone thinking about doing such a thing would talk to someone, a friend or family member or seek guidance from a support group. Help is never too far away.
Photographer
Patrick Walberg
Posts: 45196
San Juan Bautista, California, US
The Pick-Up Kitten wrote:
9-1-1
You can't sit around and wonder whether you are gonna call this number or that number or call any help hotline at all. You need to take action NOW and that action should be those three digits. The longer you wait the less likely it is that you'll get yourself help. Definitely 9-1-1 the number to call if someone is totally ready to kill themselves, but I only hope that the operator is someone either well trained (some are not) in dealing with suicidal calls or can get someone on the line who is trained.
When I've been stressed, and just wanted someone to talk to, I've called the crisis line before. You don't have to be ready to do yourself in to call that number. Many cities have crisis hotlines staffed by trained people. I was one! They can go for hours without a call to the hotline and then there are times when it's burning up with so many calls.
The main thing is to just call!
Photographer
Legacys 7
Posts: 33899
San Francisco, California, US
Candy Poses wrote:
Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network:
rainn.org; 1.800.656.HOPE thank you.
Photographer
Legacys 7
Posts: 33899
San Francisco, California, US
Kayelless wrote:
Stay in the fight. word on that.
Clothing Designer
nothing
Posts: 9229
Okinawa, Okinawa, Japan
J Henry wrote:
Nooooooo kidding. My grandmother died Christmas Eve about 50 years ago. Family has been a complete mess ever since. Every holiday is a rollercoaster of anger and depression and insecurities. It's hard to love everyone else when nobody in the room likes themselves. in my family the holidays are when the dirty secrets come out and people drink themselves into oblivion.
Model
Selena St James
Posts: 1433
WOW what a great thread...seriously...
My brother in law commited suicide 8yrs ago (my hubby and I found him) he was 28yrs old and had a 5month old baby at the time.
Depression is a sad disease and hopefully if someone that is suffering from it sees this and gets help. Not a lot of people suffering from this knows where to turn for help. Sometimes family members just aren't enough.
Thanks to the OP!
Photographer
J Henry
Posts: 8775
Silver Spring, Maryland, US
Patrick Walberg wrote:
The Pick-Up Kitten wrote:
Definitely 9-1-1 the number to call if someone is totally ready to kill themselves, but I only hope that the operator is someone either well trained (some are not) in dealing with suicidal calls or can get someone on the line who is trained.
When I've been stressed, and just wanted someone to talk to, I've called the crisis line before. You don't have to be ready to do yourself in to call that number. Many cities have crisis hotlines staffed by trained people. I was one! They can go for hours without a call to the hotline and then there are times when it's burning up with so many calls.
The main thing is to just call! Seconding this! 9-1-1 is great, but the crisis hotline is guaranteed to have people experienced and ready for this kind of thing. It's a tremendous resource.
Model
J Moon
Posts: 1447
Lake Forest, California, US
Patrick Walberg wrote:
Definitely 9-1-1 the number to call if someone is totally ready to kill themselves, but I only hope that the operator is someone either well trained (some are not) in dealing with suicidal calls or can get someone on the line who is trained.
When I've been stressed, and just wanted someone to talk to, I've called the crisis line before. You don't have to be ready to do yourself in to call that number. Many cities have crisis hotlines staffed by trained people. I was one! They can go for hours without a call to the hotline and then there are times when it's burning up with so many calls.
The main thing is to just call! 9-1-1 isn't trained to be sensitive. They are trained to send someone who can help you or get you the help you need.
If you just feel depressed and need someone to talk to, 9-1-1 can send someone who can help you as well.
Model
Stephy C
Posts: 6337
Los Angeles, California, US
Thank you for this thread... it's nice to know people can relate since depression is usually not something that's discussed openly.
Photographer
Photons 2 Pixels Images
Posts: 17011
Berwick, Pennsylvania, US
Selena St James wrote:
WOW what a great thread...seriously...
My brother in law commited suicide 8yrs ago (my hubby and I found him) he was 28yrs old and had a 5month old baby at the time.
Depression is a sad disease and hopefully if someone that is suffering from it sees this and gets help. Not a lot of people suffering from this knows where to turn for help. Sometimes family members just aren't enough.
Thanks to the OP! And sadly, sometimes family is the cause. It is for me, anyway.
I really don't have anything important to add. Just like keeping this one up near the top.
Model
Natasha240
Posts: 6438
Cassina de' Pecchi, Lombardy, Italy
Just poppin in to say hi. And that this sucks. I just dont know what to do. It seems that medication does not help me, therapy does not help me. I'm just so tired of it. Sigh.
Clothing Designer
nothing
Posts: 9229
Okinawa, Okinawa, Japan
Natasha240 wrote:
Just poppin in to say hi. And that this sucks. I just dont know what to do. It seems that medication does not help me, therapy does not help me. I'm just so tired of it. Sigh. what medication are you on?
Clothing Designer
nothing
Posts: 9229
Okinawa, Okinawa, Japan
Selena St James wrote:
WOW what a great thread...seriously...
My brother in law commited suicide 8yrs ago (my hubby and I found him) he was 28yrs old and had a 5month old baby at the time.
Depression is a sad disease and hopefully if someone that is suffering from it sees this and gets help. Not a lot of people suffering from this knows where to turn for help. Sometimes family members just aren't enough.
Thanks to the OP! have you and your family gotten any help? risk of suicide increases if you have a family member that commits suicide and then drastically increases if you are the one who finds the body.
Model
Natasha240
Posts: 6438
Cassina de' Pecchi, Lombardy, Italy
Shiggily Weebonk McGee wrote:
what medication are you on? I have been on: Effexor XR, Paxil, Zoloft,Lithium,Gabapentin, Buspar, Seroquel, Depakote,Ativan,Xanax, Xyprexa, Lamictal, I'm sure there are more but that is all I can remember. I am off all of the drugs now, they did not work anyway.
Model
Alisyn Carliene
Posts: 11756
San Bernardino, California, US
Topless New York wrote:
Sorry, not to rain on a pretty good idea, but shouldn't this really be in Off-Topic? I can see how this is appropriate. The industry sometimes stresses people out especially those struggling with it. examples: boyfriends that do not approve and are violent. anorexia, bulemia, self-confidence, factors that make them go suicidal.
i can tell you i have never met a model that has never gone down on themselves about their looks at least once. i do all the time :p
Model
Alisyn Carliene
Posts: 11756
San Bernardino, California, US
Natasha240 wrote:
Just poppin in to say hi. And that this sucks. I just dont know what to do. It seems that medication does not help me, therapy does not help me. I'm just so tired of it. Sigh. hang in there.. i have a secret depression or so i am told..
it doesn't show much.. just that i sleep 12-16 hours on a typical day! 
I like to be optimistic.. its depressing being my age although i don't know why.
Clothing Designer
nothing
Posts: 9229
Okinawa, Okinawa, Japan
Natasha240 wrote:
I have been on: Effexor XR, Paxil, Zoloft,Lithium,Gabapentin, Buspar, Seroquel, Depakote,Ativan,Xanax, Xyprexa, Lamictal, I'm sure there are more but that is all I can remember. I am off all of the drugs now, they did not work anyway. I was put on Zoloft and it destroyed me. I was like a log... just sitting and staring at the wall.
I tried Ritalin and it actually worked out kind of well.
Photographer
Photons 2 Pixels Images
Posts: 17011
Berwick, Pennsylvania, US
I've tried anti-depressants a few times. The only thing they did for me was took away my appetite and I couldn't sleep more than 3 hours a day.
The only things that help for me is time, positive attitude, and meditation. Not always easy though.
Photographer
Michael R Kihn Studios
Posts: 2559
Erie, Pennsylvania, US
Natasha240 wrote:
Just bumping.....I'm having a really bad time lately, I read this thread almost every day Stay strong
Photographer
Michael R Kihn Studios
Posts: 2559
Erie, Pennsylvania, US
Photos by Mick wrote:
i have a constant battle with severe depression this is near and dear. Been there dealing with for most of my 48 yrs of life
Photographer
Star Child
Posts: 39289
Nashville, Tennessee, US
Natasha240 wrote:
Just poppin in to say hi. And that this sucks. I just dont know what to do. It seems that medication does not help me, therapy does not help me. I'm just so tired of it. Sigh. I'm finding a combination of drugs, therapy and the most key ingredient works best for me..... that ingredient is the support of friendship.
Model
Stephy C
Posts: 6337
Los Angeles, California, US
*hugs* to all
I need some... blah
Model
Stephy C
Posts: 6337
Los Angeles, California, US
Kayelless wrote:
I'm finding a combination of drugs, therapy and the most key ingredient works best for me..... that ingredient is the support of friendship. very true... friend 
Photographer
Boho Hobo
Posts: 25351
Santa Barbara, California, US
situational depression seems to be up right now with a lot of people facing severe financial stress.
Photographer
Star Child
Posts: 39289
Nashville, Tennessee, US
Stephy C wrote:
*hugs* to all
I need some... blah *huggs*
Model
Fyre B
Posts: 157
Griswold, Connecticut, US
I just saw this topic and I had to post... I lost a good friend back in January to suicide, he got into a really bad fight with his girlfriend and he walked out in the back yard n shot himself. I'm still trying to deal with it, he was one of my best friends and someone I always saw myself dating and being with in the future and now hes gone and I won't get that chance. I almost wonder to myself everyday if there was something i could have done to change the outcome, but blaming myself is just starting an endless cycle of depression. Its hard to lose someone that way, probably the most traumatic way to see someone go.
Photographer
J Henry
Posts: 8775
Silver Spring, Maryland, US
Fyre B wrote:
I just saw this topic and I had to post... I lost a good friend back in January to suicide, he got into a really bad fight with his girlfriend and he walked out in the back yard n shot himself. I'm still trying to deal with it, he was one of my best friends and someone I always saw myself dating and being with in the future and now hes gone and I won't get that chance. I almost wonder to myself everyday if there was something i could have done to change the outcome, but blaming myself is just starting an endless cycle of depression. Its hard to lose someone that way, probably the most traumatic way to see someone go. I'm really sorry for your loss. I see what you're saying about being a hard way to lose someone.
Obviously I don't know everything about the situation. But for him to do something so final, it seems like it must have been more than just one argument with his girlfriend. It also sounds like you two were very close, and I'm sure he knew that. Instead of remorse, I wonder if you weren't one of the few bright spots in his life? All the "what ifs" that are easy to imagine now are eclipsed by the actual positives you DID bring to his life. As tragic as this was, those good times can still be celebrated, y'know?
Model
Fyre B
Posts: 157
Griswold, Connecticut, US
J Henry wrote:
I'm really sorry for your loss. I see what you're saying about being a hard way to lose someone.
Obviously I don't know everything about the situation. But for him to do something so final, it seems like it must have been more than just one argument with his girlfriend. It also sounds like you two were very close, and I'm sure he knew that. Instead of remorse, I wonder if you weren't one of the few bright spots in his life? All the "what ifs" that are easy to imagine now are eclipsed by the actual positives you DID bring to his life. As tragic as this was, those good times can still be celebrated, y'know? hell yea everytime i go out i party for him
Model
au revoir
Posts: 5366
New York, New York, US
Model
Stephy C
Posts: 6337
Los Angeles, California, US
Kayelless wrote:
*huggs* Thank you ![https://smily.hit.bg/hug.gif]()
Photographer
Star Child
Posts: 39289
Nashville, Tennessee, US
Never stop fighting.
You are a winner.
Talk to me and I'll show you that you are.
Photographer
Star Child
Posts: 39289
Nashville, Tennessee, US
Adah Hagen wrote:
Bump-bump-bump! thank you!
Model
Natasha240
Posts: 6438
Cassina de' Pecchi, Lombardy, Italy
blah, i just slept for almost 24 hours after a super crying spell
Clothing Designer
nothing
Posts: 9229
Okinawa, Okinawa, Japan
I have a question for you. Do you guys want this thread made a sticky or left loose?
People might not see it as a sticky, but at least it will remain on the top during the holidays.
Photographer
Photons 2 Pixels Images
Posts: 17011
Berwick, Pennsylvania, US
Shiggily Weebonk McGee wrote:
I have a question for you. Do you guys want this thread made a sticky or left loose?
People might not see it as a sticky, but at least it will remain on the top during the holidays. That's a tough call. I'd like to see it stay on the top, but as you said, sticky threads are often overlooked. I don't mind bumping it once a day if I see it slip to page 2. I just don't always get to the forums every day.
Model
Fyre B
Posts: 157
Griswold, Connecticut, US
making it sticky would be a good idea, but if people are going to surpass it then that would be pointless =\
Photographer
Photons 2 Pixels Images
Posts: 17011
Berwick, Pennsylvania, US
Natasha240 wrote:
blah, i just slept for almost 24 hours after a super crying spell That's rough. I had one of those episodes recently, though probably not as bad as yours.
I'm pullin' for you though. You are a wonderful person and deserve to be happy. I wish I could do more.
Model
Tanya Weaver
Posts: 7650
Atlanta, Georgia, US
Just wanted to pop in and say thanks to Shiggily for this thread.
Too many people have been lost to depression. I know many people who have it, and I am always at a lack of words and feel helpless. I am gonna steal this for when I don't know the right things to say, so I can at least point people in the right direction.
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