Forums > Critique > Serious Critique > Model Bio Critique Anyone?

Photographer

The Signature Image

Posts: 12055

Gorham, Maine, US

As a photographer and former professional resume writer I sometimes read things in a model's bio that scream "red flag" or small things that might turn off the reader. As with a resume the bio should encourage responses, not discourage responses.

If you like I'll take a look at your port and bio and let you know if there are ways you might improve your presentation?

This is for fun and any suggestions I might make are just that -- suggestions. smile

Jul 09 11 07:21 am Link

Model

Kyra Mangual

Posts: 76

San Bernardino, California, US

please smile

Jul 09 11 12:14 pm Link

Model

Melinda Blain

Posts: 508

Scottsdale, Arizona, US

Me please?

Jul 09 11 12:19 pm Link

Model

Amanda J Foster

Posts: 729

New York, New York, US

I need this. smile

Jul 09 11 02:33 pm Link

Model

coolbird

Posts: 63

Austin, Texas, US

I'd like some help please smile

Jul 09 11 03:19 pm Link

Photographer

The Signature Image

Posts: 12055

Gorham, Maine, US

Kyra Mangual wrote:
please smile

Kyra, Your bio appears to be one long paragraph, i.e., it's wordy and hard to read. The information about when you graduate, etc., only takes up space and is of no use to the photographer. It is "I" and not "i." Use caps, please.

Keep it simple. Paint a simple word picture of yourself and make it no longer than perhaps 2 short paragraphs. Keep in mind that the MM template that you filled out provides most of the information a photographer or agency needs.

I think you have a bright future as a model. Shoot some more with photographers in your area and expand your port a bit. smile

Jul 10 11 06:03 am Link

Photographer

The Signature Image

Posts: 12055

Gorham, Maine, US

Melinda Blain wrote:
Me please?

Melinda, I would suggest dropping the "Hey I'm Melinda Blain" from your bio. It does not sound professional. Also, being home-schooled is not relevant. I would suggest saying "I have flexible hours." Noting that you are a ballet dancer is great. Most photographers love working with a model who has fluid moves.

You have a very, very bright future as a model. Work on that port some. Your port is good but try and work with photographers in your area to expand your port some. Show different looks, etc.

Jul 10 11 06:13 am Link

Model

Randy Potvin

Posts: 188

Rochester, New York, US

Mine?

Jul 10 11 06:15 am Link

Model

LexLethal

Posts: 671

Los Angeles, California, US

Yes, please. smile

Jul 10 11 06:24 am Link

Photographer

The Signature Image

Posts: 12055

Gorham, Maine, US

Amanda J Foster wrote:
I need this. smile

Amanda, actually your bio is good. Short, sweet and to the point but it could be made a tad shorter.

The MM template asks Nudes, Yes or No? You indicated "No" so why stress that again? I do think, however, that stating no implieds, etc., is fine.

I would suggest that you delete references to "paid work." Again, only a suggestion, but at this point in your very young career you should focus on the art and not worry about pay for the moment.

There are some very fine photographers in your area. See if you can't get into a studio and add studio shots to your port. BTW, your port is fine.

Jul 10 11 06:27 am Link

Photographer

The Signature Image

Posts: 12055

Gorham, Maine, US

coolbird wrote:
I'd like some help please smile

Coolbird, Your bio is wordy. May I suggest deleting the paragraph that begins with "Although I am only 5'7"..." and the paragraph that begins with "As for right now..." The paragraphs add nothing to your bio. Other than that it reads well. smile

Your bio "screams" I have energy and want to work with you! That's a good thing.

Your port needs work. If you care to message me I'll go into detail.

Jul 10 11 06:39 am Link

Model

Catibra Burns

Posts: 1

Beaufort, South Carolina, US

I am interested in a bit (or a lot) of help. Please critique me if you can. Thanx!
cat.burns@yahoo.com or contact me here on MM

Oct 25 11 06:24 pm Link

Model

Lilith Marie

Posts: 424

Portland, Oregon, US

[Nvm, just noticed how dead this thread is. XD]

Oct 26 11 03:28 pm Link

Model

Rebecca Elizabeth Gomez

Posts: 321

Toronto, Ontario, Canada

I would love to know your opinion Thanks!

Oct 26 11 03:35 pm Link

Model

Kendra from Canada

Posts: 442

Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada

yes please

Oct 26 11 03:41 pm Link

Model

Chloe Selene

Posts: 636

Albuquerque, New Mexico, US

I'd love to hear your thoughts! smile

Oct 26 11 08:06 pm Link

Model

Lady Morgain

Posts: 3

Molde, Møre og Romsdal, Norway

oh, yes please!! smile)

Jul 31 12 07:30 am Link

Model

Solacium

Posts: 9640

Charleston, South Carolina, US

me too! smile

Aug 03 12 05:44 pm Link

Model

Emily Smiles

Posts: 295

Columbia, South Carolina, US

I would love to know!

Aug 07 12 09:53 pm Link

Model

Jordan Bunniie

Posts: 1728

Los Angeles, California, US

Nvm. XD

Aug 07 12 09:57 pm Link

Model

Kelsie Leigh

Posts: 968

London, England, United Kingdom

yes please smile

Aug 07 12 10:00 pm Link

Model

Jenny Jannetty

Posts: 449

Roanoke, Virginia, US

Me too!

Aug 08 12 12:37 am Link

Model

Love Annie

Posts: 60

Arcadia, California, US

Yes, please! This would be very useful. Thank you in advance!

Aug 08 12 12:49 am Link

Model

Axioma

Posts: 6819

Gent, East Flanders, Belgium

mine too please

Aug 08 12 01:35 am Link

Model

RUSSIA

Posts: 1

Boston, Massachusetts, US

could you please review my bio. i need some help.. smile

Aug 23 12 01:17 pm Link

Model

Ms Cupcake Couture

Posts: 123

Los Angeles, California, US

I'd greatly appreciate it smile

Aug 23 12 03:06 pm Link

Model

Kitty Brea

Posts: 22

Beaverton, Oregon, US

Aug 24 12 10:22 am Link

Model

Avery Mann

Posts: 3

Sacramento, California, US

Please do!

Aug 26 12 08:34 pm Link

Model

Yin L

Posts: 264

London, England, United Kingdom

me?

Aug 27 12 06:30 am Link

Model

Larisa Rose

Posts: 4

New York, New York, US

Hello,
I am interested in having you review my bio. I have not updated it in awhile, but it seems to be working for me. I have gained a lot of notice, but i think it is time for a change, and i also need a new or reconstructed bio for another website i have for my modeling, I was wondering if you could review mine and give me a few tips. I have a resume also. What else needs to be said in a bio?

Oct 12 12 11:10 am Link

Model

D A N I

Posts: 4615

Fort Lauderdale, Florida, US

Please read mine. I usually have trouble "selling" myself

Oct 15 12 09:22 pm Link

Photographer

The Effective Image

Posts: 3960

Lansing, Michigan, US

Danielle Kitten wrote:
Please read mine. I usually have trouble "selling" myself

Did you notice that the last time he reviewed a profile was in July of last year (2011)? This is an OLD thread!

Oct 16 12 10:18 am Link

Model

D A N I

Posts: 4615

Fort Lauderdale, Florida, US

The Effective Image wrote:

Did you notice that the last time he reviewed a profile was in July of last year (2011)? This is an OLD thread!

Well people should stop posting on it then and moving it to the top of the list -_-

Oct 16 12 11:03 am Link

Model

Jojo West

Posts: 1000

Annandale, Virginia, US

If you have time, would love to get your input on mine.

Thanks.

Oct 23 12 07:34 pm Link

Model

Maria Susanti

Posts: 546

Banyuwangi, Jawa Timur, Indonesia

me please

Oct 23 12 07:48 pm Link