Forums > Critique > Serious Critique > New 18+ image in need of some serious critique

Photographer

Photos by Magic

Posts: 14

Portland, Oregon, US

was experimenting with window light; would appreciate your feedback on how this one could be done better

http://www.modelmayhem.com/portfolio/pic/32867696

Jun 13 13 08:40 pm Link

Model

MelissaAnn

Posts: 3956

Seattle, Washington, US

Photos By Magic wrote:
was experimenting with window light; would appreciate your feedback on how this one could be done better

http://www.modelmayhem.com/portfolio/pic/32867696

Looks out of focus. Watermark is really atrocious.  Image feels claustrophobic- the top of her head & the tip of her boot are both cut off.

Jun 13 13 08:43 pm Link

Photographer

Photos by Magic

Posts: 14

Portland, Oregon, US

the logo is somewhat experimental

Jun 13 13 08:49 pm Link

Photographer

Revenge Photography

Posts: 1830

Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

MelissaAnn  wrote:

Looks out of focus. Watermark is really atrocious.  Image feels claustrophobic- the top of her head & the tip of her boot are both cut off.

+1

Jun 13 13 08:50 pm Link

Photographer

Photos by Magic

Posts: 14

Portland, Oregon, US

lol - tough crowd ...

Jun 13 13 08:52 pm Link

Photographer

Revenge Photography

Posts: 1830

Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

Don't be afraid of using negative space, composing to put the model to the right of the frame and not cropping so tightly would draw the eyes into the shot.  The central framing of the model along with her face being so dark in comparison to her ass, just makes her ass the visual focus of the shot.

As nice as her ass is, its not enough to carry the shot.

Jun 13 13 09:02 pm Link

Photographer

DarkSlide

Posts: 2217

Alexandria, Virginia, US

Revenge Photography wrote:
Don't be afraid of using negative space, composing to put the model to the right of the frame and not cropping so tightly would draw the eyes into the shot.  The central framing of the model along with her face being so dark in comparison to her ass, just makes her ass the visual focus of the shot.

As nice as her ass is, its not enough to carry the shot.

+1

Jun 13 13 11:02 pm Link

Photographer

Photos by Magic

Posts: 14

Portland, Oregon, US

I guess everybody has their own cropping style - I happen to prefer a tighter crop over "using negative space" ... but I see your point when it comes to this one.

Jun 14 13 08:19 pm Link

Photographer

VonTuck

Posts: 54

Marietta, Georgia, US

I like the shot. I do wish we could see her whole body....the top of her head being off is a little weird. I get it if that's just the shot, but if it was cropped then go back and recrop to have it there.

The only other thing for me is I would have had her turn just slightly more, twist her upper body just another inch or two until her breast was silhouetted rather than fading into the white...it would have made a more dynamic image in my opinion to have the full line of her body on the left, the white fade out on her breast breaks that and makes the eye bounce when it hits it.

But good composition otherwise, nothing to be ashamed of.

Jun 16 13 12:55 pm Link