Looknsee Photography wrote:
That being said, a buddy of mine is being audited for 2012.  She worked in NYC as a photo-tech for some big photography shoots, and based on "advice" she heard from co-workers, she declared that 80% of her apartment was a home office.  Those of us that know, that is a red flag for the IRS.

I stick to the 1040EZ, or if I absolutely have to, the 1040.  I've never taken anything except the standard deduction.  I'm 44 years old, and I've been audited FOUR TIMES.

Of the four times, three of the checks the IRS cut me for overpayment were so small I never bothered to cash them.  The other one was about $400 or so, and I cashed it.

Looknsee Photography wrote:
That being said, a buddy of mine is being audited for 2012.  She worked in NYC as a photo-tech for some big photography shoots, and based on "advice" she heard from co-workers, she declared that 80% of her apartment was a home office.  Those of us that know, that is a red flag for the IRS.

Schlake wrote:
I stick to the 1040EZ, or if I absolutely have to, the 1040.  I've never taken anything except the standard deduction.  I'm 44 years old, and I've been audited FOUR TIMES.

I've oversimplified my buddy's problems with the IRS -- she had very bad advice from colleagues, including deducting way too much for transportation, entertainment, meals, etc.  Worse, she had her tax returns professionally done, and her accountant didn't catch these obvious issues.  She's screwed.

My tax returns were & are very complicated.  At one point, I was living & working in one state, had rental properties here in this state, and the music business in a third state -- I was filing tax returns in three states.  Nowadays, I am self-employed (and the government doesn't like self-employed people, it seems).  I've got a graduate computer science degree and am fairly intelligent, but I admit that I don't fully understand my returns (but close enough).  But my returns create a stack that is over an inch tall, comprising hundreds of pages.

Sorry, but I've never been audited. 

Why were you audited?  What set the IRS off?

Looknsee Photography wrote:
Sorry, but I've never been audited. 

Why were you audited?  What set the IRS off?

I have no idea.  I'd think a 1040/1040EZ with the standard deduction would be the least suspicious tax submission in existance!  The fact that every time they found out I've overpayed should have discouraged them too.  The $400 overpayment was the first one, from 1988.  After that it was just a couple of bucks each time, but they printed checks for me!

Schlake wrote:
I stick to the 1040EZ, or if I absolutely have to, the 1040.  I've never taken anything except the standard deduction.  I'm 44 years old, and I've been audited FOUR TIMES.

Of the four times, three of the checks the IRS cut me for overpayment were so small I never bothered to cash them.  The other one was about $400 or so, and I cashed it.

Chuckles. You are either not being truthful, or there is an ongoing issue you are not telling us about.

Chuckarelei wrote:
Be careful what you say in here, the IRS may target you.

Ummmmm, sir, could you speak a little louder please (our lowest-bid hidden microphones don't work all that great).

Looknsee Photography wrote:
I've got a graduate computer science degree and am fairly intelligent, but I admit that I don't fully understand my returns

As you well know, I love to take a good-natured (at least that has always been my intent) pot-shot at you once in a while. Time to switch gears to keep you off-balance.

You get a freebie.

I worked at IRS for 25 years and don't understand my (simple) returns **at all** so you're doing better than I.

Lohkee wrote:

Chuckles. You are either not being truthful, or there is an ongoing issue you are not telling us about.

No, I'm being serious.  I've had a couple of times that I had to file a 1040 instead of an EZ, but in general I have nothing special to declare on anything.  My standard deduction is far beyond any real deductions I've ever had.  I have no idea why they picked on me.

Schlake wrote:
No, I'm being serious.  I've had a couple of times that I had to file a 1040 instead of an EZ, but in general I have nothing special to declare on anything.  My standard deduction is far beyond any real deductions I've ever had.  I have no idea why they picked on me.

O.K. I'm bored. I'll play for a little while before my nap time. What CP notices did you get?

Lohkee wrote:

O.K. I'm bored. I'll play for a little while. What CP notices did you get?

I have no idea what a CP notice is, but what I'd get would be a giant envelope from the IRS stuffed with papers.  Inside it would tell me that I had been audited and give the results (lots of pages).  If I agreed with the results, I should sign it and mail it back.  After I did, they would mail me a check, since they always said I had overpaid.

Schlake wrote:
I have no idea what a CP notice is, but what I'd get would be a giant envelope from the IRS stuffed with papers.  Inside it would tell me that I had been audited and give the results (lots of pages).  If I agreed with the results, I should sign it and mail it back.  After I did, they would mail me a check, since they always said I had overpaid.

ROTFLMFFAO. So, what you want us to believe is that that you have been audited four times because you PAID MORE TAXES than you actually owed?

Oh yeah, and that is not the way audits are conducted. I tried to give you a clue (CP notices). I don't believe a word of what you say.

Please, do yourself a huge favor and stop while you are (way) behind.

Lohkee wrote:
I worked at IRS for 25 years and don't understand my (simple) returns **at all** so you're doing better than I.

I read/heard somewhere (I think it was John Oliver & "Last Week Tonight") that the tax code gets maybe 500+ changes in a year, and that the code now encompasses something like 65,000 pages.

That's part of what makes a Flat Tax or a Federal sales tax appealing to me.

Lohkee wrote:

ROTFLMFFAO. So, what you want us to believe is that that you have been audited four times because you PAID MORE TAXES than you actually owed?

Oh yeah, and that is not the way audits are conducted. I tried to give you a clue (CP notices). I don't believe a word of what you say.

Please, do yourself a huge favor and stop while you are (way) behind.

Oh, yea, thanks.  It's good to know I'm a piece of human shit just because I got a scary overstuffed letter in the mail from the IRS and you're such an amazing expert at knowing my life that you know better than me what happened.  It's probably because I'm stupid right?  I'm so stupid I probably can't tie my fucking shoes in the morning without help from someone smart like you.  That's why I don't have any friends, and why everyone hates me.  It's why it's your so much more awesome than me and I need to just go die in a fucking fire so I stop wasting your precious air.

The Grey Forest wrote:
True story

Ummmm yeah. And I am so handsome (and hung  like a horse)  that all women on MM and elsewhere want to bed me (oh how I wish). Well, I suppose our fantasies are real for us in our dreams. Carry on (dreaming). Cute story, but clearly a lie as anyone with even minimal google powers can attest.

Schlake wrote:
Oh, yea, thanks.  It's good to know I'm a piece of human shit just because I got a scary overstuffed letter in the mail from the IRS and you're such an amazing expert at knowing my life that you know better than me what happened.  It's probably because I'm stupid right?  I'm so stupid I probably can't tie my fucking shoes in the morning without help from someone smart like you.  That's why I don't have any friends, and why everyone hates me.  It's why it's your so much more awesome than me and I need to just go die in a fucking fire so I stop wasting your precious air.

Sigh. After 25 years of working for IRS, I think (perhaps delusionaly so) that what you describe is not the way we do business or ever have. You are not telling the truth. Period!

As for your last comment. we are in complete agreement.

Monad Studios wrote:
I owed $3 to the IRS, and I'm due a very small refund from the state.  My withholdings are fine-tuned.

You won taxes.  Well done.


I was burning through my H&R Tax software on the 14th and got all finished and had 9 things that had to be fixed before it would let me file.  All 9 were about form 1095-A.  1095-A is the Obamacare form.  The form mailed to me, and the one you can download from Healthcare.gov was exactly the same, and those numbers I moved over to the Tax Filing software, but alas, still no good.

H&R has a handy chat tool where you can speak to a person who is supposed to know what they're doing.  On the 14th, it was ONLY a 55 minute wait to CHAT with someone.  I was on their phone line also in a race against time!

As it turns out, you have to find out (for yourself) how much the 2nd least expensive premium would be for you and put those values in your return.  Those numbers aren't on the forms they send you.  Really stupid, and something I discovered on my own while finally chatting with someone from H&R who didn't know how to fix my problem.  I find it odd that no one else had that problem since there was nothing to indicate where you were supposed to find those numbers that aren't on the paperwork the government sends you.

But, I suppose if it were efficient, it wouldn't be government.

Ron Swanson in 2016!!

R Bruce Duncan wrote:
Relax, Lohkee-

The Mayhem Off-Topic Forum isn't the office?

Do you really want to put down an obese guy whose avatar is a T shirt and a g string made of leaves?

Do you think you're going to make him look bad?

Do you think you're going to make yourself look better than he?

Oh well.

Chuckles. I am relaxed. I retired about 3 years ago. Oh yeah, relaxed I am.

I wasn't trying to put anyone down. He wears green leafy things. I actually think that's kind of cool. Dude has more balls than I do.  I respect him.

So, to the issue at hand . . . .

I am **not** an apologist for the IRS. Far from it. I don't like them.

but

I am an honest man (I'm really sorry about this).

Does the IRS fuck up? Yeppers. All the time.

But hey, don't believe me. Just go to TIGTA's website and read the audits for yourself.

That said, the blade cuts both ways.

I might not like my former employer; I might be completely thrilled to be now gone; but when I hear absolute BS, yeah, Ima gonna say it's BS.

It's just the way I roll.

The Grey Forest wrote:
7 years ago I walked into my U.S. local state IRS office, it was a bland grey, dimly lit office empty of any color with a subtle staff and their joyless faces. It was the middle of the afternoon and I took a number and was oddly left waiting for over 1/2 hour even though there was no-one else waiting and my ticket read "01" ~ finally, a boxed cubicle door opened across the waiting area where I was sitting, peculiarly designed like a cardboard prison cell in a vain effort to give the illusion of privacy.

I presented the agent with my valid Passport, State ID, permanent mailing address, phone number, DOB & SS number and parents full names, and sat patiently until he finished reviewing and entering the information into his database, being far too obvious that he was trying to angle the screen away from my prying eyes as I had purposely chosen to sit in a position that would help give me a privy view.

He asked dryly, "what can I help you with?" after sliding my ID and documents back to me.
I responded by making sure "You have all my information on file on your screen, right ?" wanting to make double sure there was no confusion or mistake on my data or if he had any unsolved questions to ask me.  The IRS agent nodded in response, stating bluntly "Yes."

I told him, "As of this date I no longer volunteer to pay any Federal Income Taxes." and I slowly sat back, looking him in the eyes and awaited his response.

He just gave me a long glassy stare that began to tickle the fine edge of awkward silence; and said "Okay," then reluctantly turned back to his screen and hit a few buttons.  I got up, walked out the door and have neither been requested; issued notice, nor had to pay FIT or ever heard from the US-IRS since.

True story

Only in your imagination.

The Grey Forest wrote:
... That being said:  as a former IRS agent/government employee = retired or otherwise, you must abide by a strict Confidentiality Agreement related to your former post, no ?

Nope. Will I talk about IRS IT security? I could legally, but will not. Sorry.

The Grey Forest wrote:
And as such, you can't be truly forthright or offer a level of Transparency that would be of honest value - calling BS or not per se.

Chuckles. I have been forthright. I know this makes you (and people with an agenda) unhappy. I'm sorry.

The Grey Forest wrote:
Even if a given citizen forced a freedom of information act request through the courts, there is a huge list of Exemptions and Exclusions and secret Identifier codes that the IRS HQ in DC would keep hidden from a US tax paying civilians. (despite a court order) Thus, input from someone's whose hands are actually tied and muzzled from providing a greater range of exposure and insightful intellect to the IRS and its inner workings, would in fact be of limited equity to us mere commoners.

What would you like to know? Oh wait, you really don't want to know anything at all. You just want to tell a story and have people swallow it - hook - line- and sinker.

I'll be the first in line to admit that the IRS has fucked up (more than once). I'll be the last in line to buy your story. It's BS, pure and simple.

You don't even have to be an IRS employee to know this.

Google is your friend.

The Grey Forest wrote:
Q: In your opinion, with Obamacare inclusions; is the current Federal tax code a holy mess ?

It was a mess before, and it's a mess now.

Around 10-ish years ago, when the IRS did a massive re-do to simplify things, a friend of mine who was an IRS agent (auditor) at the time commented that all the staff was calling it the Tax Preparer Full Employment Act.  The "simplification" moved some furniture around, covered old loopholes with material pulled from the new ones, etc. More complex than when they started.

And so it goes.

Kevin Connery wrote:
It was a mess before, and it's a mess now.

Around 10-ish years ago, when the IRS did a massive re-do to simplify things, a friend of mine who was an IRS agent (auditor) at the time commented that all the staff was calling it the Tax Preparer Full Employment Act.  The "simplification" moved some furniture around, covered old loopholes with material pulled from the new ones, etc. More complex than when they started.

And so it goes.

Can you please post a link to this imaginary act? Please? Not to worry, I won't be holding my breath.