Tony From Syracuse wrote:
"The real estate developer and Upper West Side resident — who said he can have a different sex partner in the Hamptons every weekend — doesn’t want a repeat of last summer, when a woman he met at a party tried to pull a fast one after sex.

She offered to dispose of the used condom, but when she was in the bathroom for a while, John got suspicious. He found the woman seated on the toilet and inserting his semen inside her."

OMG!!

That just made me go... wow, lady... desperate ho - ever think about making your own money?

Jules NYC wrote:
https://www.google.com/amp/nypost.com/2 … -them/amp/

Ever meet a woman paying alimony & child support?

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Utopia much?

PhotoKromze wrote:
Utopia much?

I used to work with a woman that paid alimony and child support. I thanked my lucky stars I never wanted children.

Jules NYC wrote:
Ever meet a woman paying alimony & child support?

Yes, I do know of such a woman.  She got divorced when the kids were in primary school, and they got shared custody.  She paid him, but I don't think she has to pay him anymore (the eldest child is starting college now).

Shot By Adam wrote:
Even if you're married, it doesn't mean anything either. I know two people who have had solid pre-nups thrown out of court because the judge didn't think it was fair. The next time I hear some feminazi lecture someone about misogyny I'll just laugh at them.

Women can be quite conniving with these matters far worse than men. It's having a vagina I guess.

Hunter  GWPB wrote:
You don't have to have children.  Ask Paul McCartney.

Doesnt he have like 4 biological kids and 1 adopted?

Jules NYC wrote:

Women can be quite conniving with these matters far worse than men. It's having a vagina I guess.

I can assure you I don't have a vagina, but I sure as hell got to keep 50% of everything and my kids made their own decision on who they wish to live with.

Luckily for us in the UK, family laws seem a lot more fair. It seems that in the US the ex husband is totally screwed!

L o n d o n   F o g wrote:

I can assure you I don't have a vagina, but I sure as hell got to keep 50% of everything and my kids made their own decision on who they wish to live with.

Luckily for us in the UK, family laws seem a lot more fair. It seems that in the US the ex husband is totally screwed!

I think the laws here make it very easy to make a very bad decision.

GRMACK wrote:
Even sperm donors have gotten sued decades later for child support.

http://news.nationalpost.com/news/canad … ntario-law

Google shows a lot of other donors out there in the same mess.

I've heard about this. Yikes!
If I were a man, I'd never donate sperm.

I've seen ads for women to donate eggs for 30k + depending on what you look like, your education & ethnicity.

Jules NYC wrote:
At the end of the day, using a child to live a nice lifestyle is beyond wrong.

For eons people have used and are using their children. And their neighbors'.

MoRina wrote:
When you reinforce negative stereotypes about women, don't complain when they are later used against you.

I think women are lovely, I am one.
I will call out what I see though and it has nothing to do how I feel about women as a blanket rule.

Funny, given the example.
I think women would be sensitive to this if they are doubting their own intentions.

Dea and the Beast wrote:

For eons people have used and are using their children. And their neighbors'.

It's sad.

Koryn wrote:
There's an easy way to prevent this too...like, you know, not having random hookups with sketchy people you can't actually trust.

I went to see my family a few weeks back. There was some stupid reality show on TV that my mom seems to think actually represents the real life of younger people. It showed the inside of this rich dude's apartment, and some girl he'd taken home after getting drunk, leaving his house the next morning. My mom was all like, "Oh, look how nasty and gross that girl is. How disgusting." I couldn't help but be like, "Ummm, it's funny you put all the accusations on the woman in this situation when that dude has supposedly banged like ten different anonymous women in the same week." Great way to continue blaming everything on women and letting men get off scott-fuckin-free when they make poor decisions.

This. Actually getting to know someone and build trust before sleeping together seems to be a lost art.

If you don't want a surprise baby... keep your pants on until you know someone well enough to know that they won't pull this shit.

Stephen Fletcher wrote:
I got my snip job years ago when I suspected my girlfriend was trying to get pregnant.  She denied it but her best friend and her sister told me she was.

It must have felt pretty bad knowing that considering she was your girlfriend and not some random woman you picked up to have sex with.

Koryn wrote:
There's an easy way to prevent this too...like, you know, not having random hookups with sketchy people you can't actually trust.

I went to see my family a few weeks back. There was some stupid reality show on TV that my mom seems to think actually represents the real life of younger people. It showed the inside of this rich dude's apartment, and some girl he'd taken home after getting drunk, leaving his house the next morning. My mom was all like, "Oh, look how nasty and gross that girl is. How disgusting." I couldn't help but be like, "Ummm, it's funny you put all the accusations on the woman in this situation when that dude has supposedly banged like ten different anonymous women in the same week." Great way to continue blaming everything on women and letting men get off scott-fuckin-free when they make poor decisions.

A man with a fuck & chuck mentality attracts women that put pinholes in condoms.
They both are the same with different intentions.

Playing with a human being's life seems more dastardly to me than a guy who wants to have sex with multiple women over the summer. In fact, the guy isn't a dick at all if he's clear with his intentions. If one is on board with that, so what?

Same goes for a woman, being clear with her intentions.

Having a date with a rich guy in the Hamptons that ends up with sex is the same as anyone having a date that ends up with sex. If two people don't take time to know each other, that's on them.

Is it illegal to put a pinhole in a condom?
If not, it should be.

Tony From Syracuse wrote:
in any case I dont even know how these people can have so many sex partners. while its a normal realistic fear, I have such a batshit crazy fear of getting HIV I cant imagine how one has one night stands and multiple sex partners over a small amount of time even with condoms.

Ditto that.

Jules NYC wrote:

A man with a fuck & chuck mentality attracts women that put pinholes in condoms.
They both are the same with different intentions.

Playing with a human being's life seems more dastardly to me than a guy who wants to have sex with multiple women over the summer. In fact, the guy isn't a dick at all if he's clear with his intentions. If one is on board with that, so what?

Same goes for a woman, being clear with her intentions.

Having a date with a rich guy in the Hamptons that ends up with sex is the same as anyone having a date that ends up with sex. If two people don't take time to know each other, that's on them.

Is it illegal to put a pinhole in a condom?
If not, it should be.

It's really a matter of consequences. Sex comes with a risk of pregnancy and STD's. No matter how much prevention is put into place, there's a risk, however small, of it happening. The notion of a man having one night stands with random women and then complaining about the risk of being on the hook for child support is like walking up to a Leopard Seal and complaining that it's trying to kill you. It's the nature of the beast.

If someone isn't willing to deal with the consequences of their actions, they probably shouldn't be doing it in the first place.

Lieza Nova wrote:

It's really a matter of consequences. Sex comes with a risk of pregnancy and STD's. No matter how much prevention is put into place, there's a risk, however small, of it happening. The notion of a man having one night stands with random women and then complaining about the risk of being on the hook for child support is like walking up to a Leopard Seal and complaining that it's trying to kill you. It's the nature of the beast.

If someone isn't willing to deal with the consequences of their actions, they probably shouldn't be doing it in the first place.

I agree with you on most points but don't believe paying child support for a child you don't want is a mere consequence. It should be illegal to put a pinhole in a condom. If a woman "oops" forgets to take her pill that gets into murky waters.

Jules NYC wrote:

I agree with you on most points but don't believe paying child support for a child you don't want is a mere consequence. It should be illegal to put a pinhole in a condom. If a woman "oops" forgets to take her pill that gets into murky waters.

There's definitely a range of severity, but consequences are the potential outcomes of an action, positive or negative. Sex potentially leads to pregnancy and pregnancy potentially leads to child support. It also potentially leads to STD's, some of which can be transmitted even with condom use. If a woman will lie about birth control, there's a strong likelihood that she'll lie about that too.

I'm not saying that sex with random people is wrong or anything like that, but rather that there are definite risks involved in it. My point stands. If someone isn't willing to deal with the risks involved in an activity, they shouldn't be doing it. Not liking the risks, doing it anyway and then complaining about it after the fact... I have a hard time mustering up any sympathy in those situations.

Lieza Nova wrote:
. The notion of a man having one night stands with random women and then complaining about the risk of being on the hook for child support is like walking up to a Leopard Seal and complaining that it's trying to kill you. It's the nature of the beast.

If someone isn't willing to deal with the consequences of their actions, they probably shouldn't be doing it in the first place.

This was basically what I was getting at.

That being said, I went through periods of my life when I had numerous partners. They were not "pick ups" though, but people I actually went out with for varying lengths of time, knew and liked. I never got pregnant by accident, or contracted an STD. It wasn't just dumb "luck" either; it was being safe, barrier methods ALONG WITH hormonal birth control and getting tested regularly. I also liked everyone I ever had sex with, and didn't date or fuck crazy people.

I've been in a monogamous relationship now for two and a half years, with the person I will be spending the rest of my life with (and I never said that about ANY person I was involved with prior to this). Having had so many varying sexual and relationship experiences, both serious and casual, I absolutely knew when I finally met my current partner that he was the person I'd settle down with. And that has proven to be the case. Having a lot of partners comes with good sides and bad sides. The bad is that you have to be careful because all behaviors carry risk. The good, at least for me, is that a few of my ex-lovers have become my closest platonic friends, and I have formed bonds with these people that remained strong after the sexual aspect ended. Also, it taught me a lot about human nature, and what I personally needed to make a long term relationship work. People make a lot of negative judgements about people they consider "slutty," but it's a complicated thing that does actually come with psychological and emotional benefits for some people.

But just hooking up with some random person, then never speaking to them again... Well, if you can't accept the innate risks, then...

Koryn wrote:
There's an easy way to prevent this too...like, you know, not having random hookups with sketchy people you can't actually trust.

I went to see my family a few weeks back. There was some stupid reality show on TV that my mom seems to think actually represents the real life of younger people. It showed the inside of this rich dude's apartment, and some girl he'd taken home after getting drunk, leaving his house the next morning. My mom was all like, "Oh, look how nasty and gross that girl is. How disgusting." I couldn't help but be like, "Ummm, it's funny you put all the accusations on the woman in this situation when that dude has supposedly banged like ten different anonymous women in the same week." Great way to continue blaming everything on women and letting men get off scott-fuckin-free when they make poor decisions.

yep.

I'm all for casual sex and aint here to slut shame anyone, but if you're banging up to a dozen strangers per season then you need to do more than just ask her if she's on birth control and assume she's being honest with you. You can have casual sex with complete strangers you don't trust if thats what you wanna do, but you still have some fucking responsibility. Bring your own condoms so you know they're not damaged, WEAR THE FUCKING CONDOM, take off and dispose of the condom yourself. This is literally not difficult. Its so so easy to NOT HAVE A BABY YOU DONT WANT if you actually give half a fuck before you take your pants off.

As for the divorce/alimony/custody bullshit....men literally spent centuries insisting that home and child care was a "womans job" and that they weren't fit for or good at literally ANYTHING BESIDES HOMEMAKING AND CHILD REARING and worked their asses off just to make sure we wouldnt be paid well enough to support ourselves and our family without them thus creating the very "sexist standard" of women being the ones who get to keep the house, money, and kids that they always want to bring up when women discuss equal rights. You can't have it both ways. You want dudes to get a fairer shot in court? Cool, support womens rights and do your part to dismantle the idea that women are helpless and belong barefoot, knocked up, and in the kitchen, and maybe one day when you get divorced you'll be the one who keeps the house and gets child support payments.

Lieza Nova wrote:
There's definitely a range of severity, but consequences are the potential outcomes of an action, positive or negative. Sex potentially leads to pregnancy and pregnancy potentially leads to child support. It also potentially leads to STD's, some of which can be transmitted even with condom use. If a woman will lie about birth control, there's a strong likelihood that she'll lie about that too.

I'm not saying that sex with random people is wrong or anything like that, but rather that there are definite risks involved in it. My point stands. If someone isn't willing to deal with the risks involved in an activity, they shouldn't be doing it. Not liking the risks, doing it anyway and then complaining about it after the fact... I have a hard time mustering up any sympathy in those situations.

I do have empathy for people who get scammed into having a child. Not every guy is a multiple-partner man. Pregnancy can happen with just one person, one time. Same with STDs.

It's easy to take on the stance well, too bad, he/she deserved it if the person is a perceived jerk. Thing is, even the nicest people can be scammed. A condom is not 100% but pretty damn close. If a woman deliberately is trying to baste herself like a turkey to get pregnant, that should be illegal.

Karma has a way of working itself out but no matter how much of a jerk, I think it's unfair.

Jules NYC wrote:
I do have empathy for people who get scammed into having a child. Not every guy is a multiple-partner man. Pregnancy can happen with just one person, one time. Same with STDs.

That's a little bit different than what we're talking about here. Accidents happen and people lie to those with honest intentions. I have a lot of sympathy for people in those situations.

On the other hand, there are people who are purposely sleeping with large numbers of random people, most likely attracting them by flaunting their wealth, and then complaining when it backfires on them. I have little sympathy for these people. They're using women and then whining when those women try to use them.

Jules NYC wrote:
It's easy to take on the stance well, too bad, he/she deserved it if the person is a perceived jerk. Thing is, even the nicest people can be scammed. A condom is not 100% but pretty damn close. If a woman deliberately is trying to baste herself like a turkey to get pregnant, that should be illegal.

Karma has a way of working itself out but no matter how much of a jerk, I think it's unfair.

Again, these guys are making a habit of using women, yet have a problem when women try to turn the tables on them.  I don't think these guys are jerks for trying to have a lot of random sex. There's nothing inherently wrong with having sex or having sex with a lot of uni own people. I think they're jerks for having a lot of random sex and then whining when there are repercussions for having a lot of random sex. Sex has repercussions and sex with a lot of unknown people has a lot more potential repercussions. They can either deal with it or engage in sexual behavior with a more acceptable level of risk.

Lieza Nova wrote:
That's a little bit different than what we're talking about here. Accidents happen and people lie to those with honest intentions. I have a lot of sympathy for people in those situations.

On the other hand, there are people who are purposely sleeping with large numbers of random people, most likely attracting them by flaunting their wealth, and then complaining when it backfires on them. I have little sympathy for these people. They're using women and then whining when those women try to use them.


Again, these guys are making a habit of using women, yet have a problem when women try to turn the tables on them.  I don't think these guys are jerks for trying to have a lot of random sex. There's nothing inherently wrong with having sex or having sex with a lot of uni own people. I think they're jerks for having a lot of random sex and then whining when there are repercussions for having a lot of random sex. Sex has repercussions and sex with a lot of unknown people has a lot more potential repercussions. They can either deal with it or engage in sexual behavior with a more acceptable level of risk.

I think these Hamptons guys that have a lot of sex with different people are eliminating this risk by the vasectomy.

As much as I ageee with your feeling on this, it's not fair to bring an innocent child into the world by someone looking to cash in be the man deserving of the responsibility or not.

My boyfriend brought this article to my attention because we both were shaking our head at it all. We have the same values about all of this. We're both not rich and both honest, decent, hard-working people.

Tony From Syracuse wrote:

Doesn't he have like 4 biological kids and 1 adopted?

My recollection was incorrect.  I had thought he and Heather Mills did not have children.  I also had remembered the marriage as being shorter than it was.  When I think of Heather Mills, I always remember a joke about her and McCartney.  Mills and McCartney had one daughter.   I did not look to see what he brought into this world with Linda, since that marriage ended with Linda's death, it wasn't relevant.

Jules NYC wrote:
I think these Hamptons guys that have a lot of sex with different people are eliminating this risk by the vasectomy.

The risk of pregnancy, perhaps. The risk of STD's and the consequences of getting a vasectomy, not so much. If they ever do want children...

Jules NYC wrote:
As much as I ageee with your feeling on this, it's not fair to bring an innocent child into the world by someone looking to cash in be the man deserving of the responsibility or not.

My boyfriend brought this article to my attention because we both were shaking our head at it all. We have the same values about all of this. We're both not rich and both honest, decent, hard-working people.

Oh, it's definitely not ok. The women aren't any better than the men are. The men are The ones who are complaining about it. If gold diggers started whining that the rich men were getting vasectomies to thwart their attempts to have a baby, I wouldn't have any sympathy for them either.

I know enough people who make really stupid decisions and wonder why they have problems that shit like this no longer surprises me.