I do my own retouching as well so I know how hard it is. The first thing that caught my eye was the extra make-up it looked like you added around the eyes. Not sure if you just darkened it or what, but to me the pic looked better without what ever that gray shade is you added. Also, it seemed to me that you smoothed the face out, but left the bags under the eye, and the deep groove on the side of her mouth. (they are only obvious because the rest of the face is so smooth, and it's only noticeable on the right side of the face, making stand out.)
The color is good, the skin on the body looks good and the way you took out the background looks natural.
Hope that helps.