This should have been posted here so don't be suprised if it gets moved there.
For me, the first thing that immediately catches my eye is that the poor girl looks like she got punched pretty hard. I don't know if that was the MUA or PP but her cheek looks horribly swollen, particularly in the bottom image. The other major detractor is her hair looks like it had little to no attention paid to it. Fly aways are to be expected but its all over the place! More attention should have been paid attention to it at the time of capture and then cleaned-up a little in post, not fixed or neglected. Those are the major issues.
A few other quibbles that I have is that the red channel is blown out on her forehead and I think the model is a little too saturated. I would recommend toning that down some. Also, the center of her chest (in the bottom image), is a little red giving the impression she has a rash. The background in the bottom image is fairly neutral throughout but the top image seems to have a green to red gradient running across it. Nothing really wrong with that per se, but if you want to keep the two images cohesive, it should be one or the other. Personally, I'd go with the neutral background myself.