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Forums > Critique > Serious Critique > Does confidence live in your model bio? Search   Reply
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Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Now and then I browse through local models' profiles for potential leads and am always surprised how much influence a model's MM bio has on my decision to want to include them--or not--in my portfolio.

If you're uncertain about your bio and/or portfolio I'd love to share ways to help you improve your self presentation.

This is just for fun and any suggestions I make are simply that.
Aug 16 12 10:31 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
KCLynne
Posts: 466
Harlan, Iowa, US


Would love an opinion
Aug 17 12 01:09 am  Link  Quote 
Model
Kaia Murphy
Posts: 171
Champlin, Minnesota, US


I'd like to hear your thoughts. My goal was to keep my profile concise, but still informative. More importantly, let me know if you find any grammar or spelling errors! That kinda stuff just drives me nuts, but one can only proofread so many times. wink
Aug 17 12 06:36 am  Link  Quote 
Model
Ester Ginzbur
Posts: 128
Edison, New Jersey, US


Interested in knowing.
Aug 17 12 06:39 am  Link  Quote 
Makeup Artist
PaulaMUAH
Posts: 36
Houston, Texas, US


I'd love to hear your opinion!
Aug 17 12 11:10 am  Link  Quote 
Model
Caitin Bre
Posts: 1,798
Naperville, Illinois, US


I think so...
Aug 17 12 11:16 am  Link  Quote 
Model
Just Danielle
Posts: 2,305
Petersfield, England, United Kingdom


what do you think?
Aug 17 12 11:20 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


KCLynne wrote:
Would love an opinion

KC,

Thanks for the opportunity to read through your MM! I like that you're not afraid to show your shape in your portfolio. I also like that your bio is written the way you talk (I can tell). It makes it sound natural and is easy to read.

One suggestion I would offer is to put your goals first so that they stand out. They give photographers and agencies a little look into what you want to do with your career. Don't be afraid to say what you mean.

"I'm hoping this site will help me get in touch with some great photographers, agencies, or clients looking for a classy and professional plus-sized model."

Perfect goal. (You wrote that, you know.)

Another suggestion is to take out the mention of being new. You've been modeling on and off for 16 years. Instead of mentioning that plus-size modeling is newer to you, emphasize what you've done and what you want to accomplish. Maybe something like "I take guidance well and want to try new things" instead of "I'm generally not afraid to try new things so if a photographer had an idea that he or she thought might work, I'd be open to discuss it."

A final suggestion is to move your favorite website of the two you mention in your bio to your MM link (there is an option to add a website in your profile) and to mention your credits in the "credits" section rather than in your bio.

I hope this is helpful. If you do take the time to rewrite your bio I'd love to read it. Let me know!

All the best,

Wendy

Aug 17 12 01:49 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Kaia Murphy wrote:
I'd like to hear your thoughts. My goal was to keep my profile concise, but still informative. More importantly, let me know if you find any grammar or spelling errors! That kinda stuff just drives me nuts, but one can only proofread so many times. wink

Kaia,

You sound cute. smile I like how your personality shows in your bio. Your face would do well in commercial modeling, in my opinion.

I only have one minor suggestion for you(and no, I didn't find any grammatical errors), and that is to take out the dates of your surgery. Enough time has passed that their appearance won't change enough to make a difference about when they happened.

Good luck!

Wendy

Aug 17 12 01:56 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Kelly Hess wrote:
I would absolutely love to hear! I'm always working on my portfolio, but the bio needs some attention too..

Kelly,

Your bio looks great. I like how you've divided it into related sections, that makes it very easy to read. My suggestions for you relate more to your portfolio. I don't review nudes but looking through your other pictures I noticed something very important.

I love how different the poses are in your portfolio. It's not the same position in all your images and I imagine that's how it in your nudes as well. Conversely, I only found three or four different expressions. While the poses draw me into your images, the expression doesn't always keep me there.

I hope you find this helpful. Best of luck!

Wendy

Aug 17 12 02:02 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


PaulaMUAH wrote:
I'd love to hear your opinion!

Paula,

"I'm a hairstylist with 3 years of salon experience working in downtown Portland." Boom! Great intro. Simple. To the point. That is who you are. Never change that (unless you move or as your years of experience grow, wink). If you lived in Utah, I would book you.

As I'm sure you've noticed, the images in a MUA's portfolio are highly dependent on the photographer who actually takes the image. The makeup could be stellar and flawless but if the photographer takes a bad image it won't be noticed. (I didn't find any bad images in there.) Thus, my only suggestion is that as you continue to gain experience, make sure you know and like the style of the photographer who is shooting the model.

--And a casting call to gather people you like is a great idea. I noticed you have one. Again, if you lived in Utah I would want my name on that list.

Great work!

Wendy

Aug 17 12 02:09 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Caitin   wrote:
I think so...

Caitin,

Thanks for the opportunity to review your MM. I don't review nudes and since that's the majority of your portfolio I don't think I know enough to comment except to say that what I do see keeps my interest.

As for your bio, this isn't as much a critique as a question. In your first sentence you mention that you are comfortable with your body and passionate about your work, but in the second sentence you say that you only want to do erotic nude that doesn't reveal your identity. Why is that? (Again, not a critique, the sentences are just sending opposite messages.)

My only other comment would be to fix the sentence structure of what you've aleady written. A single space between one sentence and the next, only putting capital letters at the beginning of sentences unless it's a name or other proper noun. That won't matter as much as your actual portfolio but it certainly helps show your professionalism.

I hope this helps. Good luck!

Wendy

Aug 17 12 02:18 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Just Danielle wrote:
what do you think?

Danielle,

Your portfolio is beautiful! You've chosen your photographers well, or they chose you, or whatever. Keep it up!

Your bio, though...TMI. Way too much happening here. With the boxes everywhere and with so much information it's as intimidating as reading a legal agreement; it's possible, but intimidating.

- "I can be creative and don't need direction in my shoots." > This sounds like you wouldn't want a photographer to guide you at all even if they wanted to. Maybe find a less aggressive way to say that you know what you're doing?

- I'd take out the friend requests part. You can still note an invitation for people to be your friend but people already know that if they want to book you, they have to come to you.

- Move your goals (art nude, glamour, TFCD conditions, etc.) to the top so it's easy to find. Goals are important to a photographer!

- Only mention your rates once. The last section about paid shoots vs. TF is the clearest, I'd keep that and take out the other sections that mention rates and such.

That's all the specifics. If you do decide to do a rewrite I'd suggest three paragraphs at the most and take out the boxes.

I'd love to read any changes you make, if any.

Good luck in everything!

Wendy

Aug 17 12 02:30 pm  Link  Quote 
Makeup Artist
PaulaMUAH
Posts: 36
Houston, Texas, US


Thanks Wendy!
Aug 17 12 02:47 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Caitin Bre
Posts: 1,798
Naperville, Illinois, US


Perceptive Portraits wrote:

Caitin,

Thanks for the opportunity to review your MM. I don't review nudes and since that's the majority of your portfolio I don't think I know enough to comment except to say that what I do see keeps my interest.

As for your bio, this isn't as much a critique as a question. In your first sentence you mention that you are comfortable with your body and passionate about your work, but in the second sentence you say that you only want to do erotic nude that doesn't reveal your identity. Why is that? (Again, not a critique, the sentences are just sending opposite messages.)

My only other comment would be to fix the sentence structure of what you've aleady written. A single space between one sentence and the next, only putting capital letters at the beginning of sentences unless it's a name or other proper noun. That won't matter as much as your actual portfolio but it certainly helps show your professionalism.

I hope this helps. Good luck!

Wendy

I thought your critique was about the introduction on the profile (bio) and if it kept your interest, not the images or what genre...sorry.

My profile states that I am comfortable with my body and passionate about my work for the purpose of letting photographers know I am confident in being able to be nude and express myself, I have found they appreciate knowing that nudity is not a problem.The photographer can feel at ease as well, it assures them I am not going to show up and be shy in front of the camera or offended or upset if asked about nude genre.Adding to my profile that I keep identity hidden does not change the fact I am comfortable with my body or passionate.I prefer my identity hidden from family.

I will proof read my profile and correct what you have pointed out, I do appreciate that.
Thank you!

Aug 17 12 06:45 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
KCLynne
Posts: 466
Harlan, Iowa, US


Perceptive Portraits wrote:
KC,

Thanks for the opportunity to read through your MM! I like that you're not afraid to show your shape in your portfolio. I also like that your bio is written the way you talk (I can tell). It makes it sound natural and is easy to read.

One suggestion I would offer is to put your goals first so that they stand out. They give photographers and agencies a little look into what you want to do with your career. Don't be afraid to say what you mean.

"I'm hoping this site will help me get in touch with some great photographers, agencies, or clients looking for a classy and professional plus-sized model."

Perfect goal. (You wrote that, you know.)

Another suggestion is to take out the mention of being new. You've been modeling on and off for 16 years. Instead of mentioning that plus-size modeling is newer to you, emphasize what you've done and what you want to accomplish. Maybe something like "I take guidance well and want to try new things" instead of "I'm generally not afraid to try new things so if a photographer had an idea that he or she thought might work, I'd be open to discuss it."

A final suggestion is to move your favorite website of the two you mention in your bio to your MM link (there is an option to add a website in your profile) and to mention your credits in the "credits" section rather than in your bio.

I hope this is helpful. If you do take the time to rewrite your bio I'd love to read it. Let me know!

All the best,

Wendy

Wendy,

I took some of your advice and revamped my profile and would love to hear your thoughts now. 

Thanks a bunch.  I never would have thought that just moving things around could make such a difference!

KC

Aug 17 12 07:37 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


KC,

Big improvement! It's a little long but it's charming. smile I hope it draws the kind of photographers you want to work with to you.

Wendy
Aug 17 12 10:07 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Paige Morgan
Posts: 4,058
New York, New York, US


It's lengthy, but saves me back and forth....anything missing in there?
Aug 17 12 10:45 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Axioma
Posts: 6,756
Gent, East Flanders, Belgium


smile?
Aug 17 12 11:47 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Axioma
Posts: 6,756
Gent, East Flanders, Belgium


DP
Aug 17 12 11:47 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Danielle Arizona
Posts: 63
Tempe, Arizona, US


Me? smile
Aug 18 12 12:20 am  Link  Quote 
Model
M E L U X I N E
Posts: 1,198
Sydney, New South Wales, Australia


I'm not sure about confidence, but it sure as hell shows that I've got the wrong site for my goals wink
Aug 18 12 11:54 am  Link  Quote 
Model
Kaia Murphy
Posts: 171
Champlin, Minnesota, US


Perceptive Portraits wrote:
I only have one minor suggestion for you(and no, I didn't find any grammatical errors), and that is to take out the dates of your surgery. Enough time has passed that their appearance won't change enough to make a difference about when they happened.

Good luck!

Wendy

Thanks much! Done and done. wink

Aug 18 12 12:50 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Ms Cupcake Couture
Posts: 123
Los Angeles, California, US


Please smile
Aug 18 12 02:17 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
MatureModelMM
Posts: 902
Detroit, Michigan, US


Please take a look at mine. Much like some of the others, I want to keep it accurate and give needed information without making it so long that no one will read it.
Aug 18 12 02:23 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Rachel Hayslette
Posts: 205
Weaver, Alabama, US


What about mine?
Aug 18 12 08:14 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Meluxine wrote:
I'm not sure about confidence, but it sure as hell shows that I've got the wrong site for my goals wink

Mel,

Going to your MM profile I wasn't sure what to expect. Now that I've read through it I still don't, haha. In a way you've turned it into your own website, so for you and your personality what you have seems to be working. I hope you find that man you're looking for, lol.

Wendy

Aug 18 12 08:24 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Paige Morgan wrote:
It's lengthy, but saves me back and forth....anything missing in there?

Paige,

Normally I don't recommend more than three paragraphs but the way you've broken it out into question-and-answer format makes it work. An intro would be ice at the beginning under your booking notice, maybe something like, "I'm the swiss army knife of models, and have relevant experience in most anything you can think of. It doesn't matter if you're brand new or an established photographer/hairstylist/MUA/designer/whatever. I'll always be prompt, professional and polite, and give each shoot my all." Well, maybe not that exactly but a nice introduction before the specifics would warm up your bio a bit.

I like the picture in your credits that shows what you look like right now. For someone who changes their appearance often I think that's a great solution.

If you do make edits I'd love to read them. Let me know!

Wendy

Aug 18 12 08:36 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Polly Anther
Posts: 53
Darlington, England, United Kingdom


Would be helpful to know!
Aug 19 12 02:15 am  Link  Quote 
Model
Love Annie
Posts: 60
Costa Mesa, California, US


I'd like your input. Mine is pretty lengthy; I have no idea what to take out.
Aug 19 12 02:23 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Danielle Mae Jake wrote:
Me? smile

Danielle,

The first thing I notice is that you haven't selected any genres for your MM profile. This is how a potential photographer or agency would find you and/or know what you're interested in. Make sure you fill that out!

The content of your bio is good, but I would shift it around to keep like things together and take out the part that mentions a limit to your experience.

For example...(in words you have already written)

I am seeking to expand my market and grow my portfolio by doing almost all kinds of modeling, excluding nudes, to grow professionally. I am also interested in networking, and making friends, because no contact is a bad contact! I welcome all tips and advice, and will give any that I can back.

(Then mention your work in the Credits section of your MM profile.)

I hope this is helpful. If you decide to rewrite your bio completely I'd love to read it. Let me know!

Wendy

Aug 19 12 03:36 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Ms Cupcake Couture wrote:
Please smile

Cupcake,

Your bio (and personality, no doubt) is truly unique. After reading it I looked through your portfolio and found some great images in there that proved my first instinct right--your bio matches your style very well and also seems to be attracting some skilled photographers to you. Another strength I found was how you keep your bio up to date by the week. Good on you!

The only suggestion I have is to perhaps move your booking schedule higher up so one can read it without scrolling.

Good luck with everything!

Wendy

Aug 19 12 09:06 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


MatureModelMM wrote:
Please take a look at mine. Much like some of the others, I want to keep it accurate and give needed information without making it so long that no one will read it.

M,

Good on you for being yourself out there. Reality really is good. smile Your bio is as unique as Cupcake's (above). I haven't met you before but it seems like the way you've written your bio matches your personality without being excessive. Don't change a thing.

Wendy

Aug 19 12 09:38 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Rachel Hayslette wrote:
What about mine?

Rachel,

Hi there. Your portfolio is beautiful! I read through your bio and didn't find any red flags. My only suggestion for you is to refresh it often as you spend more time on MM. If one day you decide to specialize in a style you might want to include that as well.

Good luck in all!

Wendy

Aug 19 12 09:49 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Perceptive Portraits
Posts: 227
North Salt Lake, Utah, US


Polly Anther wrote:
Would be helpful to know!

Polly,

I like your bio. It's clear, concise and states your goals right up front. Keep finding good photographers, you have a great portfolio building up.

Good luck!

Wendy

Aug 19 12 09:55 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Hannah Richmond
Posts: 69
Manchester, England, United Kingdom


I think I may need some help?!
Aug 20 12 01:48 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Yin L
Posts: 264
London, England, United Kingdom


mine? smile
Aug 21 12 01:31 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
The Grace Gabbana
Posts: 351
Santa Rosa, California, US


I am interested in hearing your opinion.

G
Aug 21 12 01:36 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Cynthia Serrano
Posts: 12,466
Newark, New Jersey, US


Curious bunny
Aug 21 12 01:37 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Kelsie Leigh
Posts: 968
London, England, United Kingdom


me please smile
Aug 21 12 01:47 pm  Link  Quote 
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