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Photographer
DMesser Photography
Posts: 1,288
Oceanside, California, US


Most of the models I contact either want to shoot with me, or give a nice response such as "Thank you for the compliment and request to shoot, but i'm not ready to shoot your style at this time".  Or something like this.  But, once in a while I get a response from a girl who says "NO THANK YOU, I WANT TO STAY CLASSY".   She is 5'4" and wants to shoot high fashion, but also puts in her details that she will shoot lingerie, swimsuit, erotic and body paint among other genres.  I thank you ladies who give a pleasant response whether it is yes, i want to shoot or no thank you.  I really appreciate you.  I know your not all going to say yes. 

Don
Oct 09 12 12:25 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Rachael Bueckert
Posts: 1,121
Red Deer, Alberta, Canada


There will always be harsh/rude/blunt people in this world. Dealing with it is a part of life. Have you considered going to the critique forum to get feedback on your work, some constructive criticism to improve and fine-tune your portfolio? The easiest way to get more 'yes' replies is to always keep improving the quality of your portfolio, finding out what you are doing right and what you can do better.

Best of luck!
Oct 09 12 01:02 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
James S Kassanoff
Posts: 812
Washington, New Jersey, US


Rudeness runs rampant on the web.  People who, in the real world, are simply self-centered take it to the next level when they don't have to stand face-to-face.  It sucks, but its the way it is.

Stay positive and and bully through it.  Don't give up and keep shooting!  :-)
Oct 09 12 01:17 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
MoRina
Posts: 5,594
Fort Lauderdale, Florida, US


Response:  "in order to stay classy, one must attain the level first."
Oct 09 12 02:21 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
L Bass
Posts: 940
Nacogdoches, Texas, US


MoRina wrote:
Response:  "in order to stay classy, one must attain the level first."

LOL... well said wink

Oct 09 12 02:28 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
DOUGLASFOTOS
Posts: 7,964
Los Angeles, California, US


OP...Trust me...It is not her.
Oct 09 12 02:28 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Jessie Shannon
Posts: 2,004
Las Vegas, Nevada, US


MoRina wrote:
Response:  "in order to stay classy, one must attain the level first."

smile

Oct 09 12 02:31 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
L Bass
Posts: 940
Nacogdoches, Texas, US


DOUGLASFOTOS wrote:
OP...Trust me...It is not her.

After closer examination I must say... again... Well said.

Oct 09 12 02:32 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Ivanafox
Posts: 979
Healesville, Victoria, Australia


DOUGLASFOTOS wrote:
OP...Trust me...It is not her.

OP wasn't asking for a critique, The OP was saying how much he appreciates the models who reject him in a pleasant way instead of being rude. I'm quite certain he is fully aware he is not everything to everyone, just like you probably aren't either.

A valid comment since people find it next to impossible to be polite when they are hiding behind a computer screen. Your comment and others on this thread is a perfect example.

Oct 09 12 02:52 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
M A S T E R S
Posts: 309
Murphys, California, US


Ivanafox wrote:

OP wasn't asking for a critique, The OP was saying how much he appreciates the models who reject him in a pleasant way instead of being rude. I'm quite certain he is fully aware he is not everything to everyone, just like you probably aren't either.

A valid comment since people find it next to impossible to be polite when they are hiding behind a computer screen. Your comment and others on this thread is a perfect example.

+10

Gives weight to some recent headlines stating that studies have found internet discussion forums are being linked to higher rates of obesity, depression, and lack of tact found in today's society.

Oct 09 12 03:16 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Eclectic Vision
Posts: 8,152
Toledo, Ohio, US


MoRina wrote:
Response:  "in order to stay classy, one must attain the level first."

http://ic2.pbase.com/o4/97/388497/1/64021719.CHPTbjAb.applause.gif

Oct 09 12 03:17 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Jordan Bunniie
Posts: 1,617
Los Angeles, California, US


MoRina wrote:
Response:  "in order to stay classy, one must attain the level first."

Well said.

Oct 09 12 03:18 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Jessie Shannon
Posts: 2,004
Las Vegas, Nevada, US


M A S T E R S wrote:

+10

Gives weight to some recent headlines stating that studies have found internet discussion forums are being linked to higher rates of obesity, depression, and lack of tact found in today's society.

Oct 09 12 03:20 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Stormee
Posts: 2,463
San Antonio, Texas, US


Oct 09 12 03:27 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Digitoxin
Posts: 13,332
Houston, Texas, US


DOUGLASFOTOS wrote:
OP...Trust me...It is not her.

I am thinking this too.

The OP is all miffed because someone looked at his work and found it "not classy".  So what?  The model responded with the truth as SHE saw it.  I will not state if I agree or not as that would be a critique.  I will say that i have personally learned a lot from people who are direct and don't mince words.  That does not make them Rude.

Oct 09 12 03:48 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Cole Morrison
Posts: 3,958
Portland, Oregon, US


After enough models are saying the same thing, don't you start to wonder if maybe they are right? Since this isn't critique I cannot elaborate but there's some food for thought.
Oct 09 12 03:54 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Miss AY
Posts: 8,164
Portland, Maine, US


Hey she said "no thank you" right? ;P
Oct 09 12 04:04 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Dannielle Levan
Posts: 12,857
New Westminster, British Columbia, Canada


DMesser Photography wrote:
Most of the models I contact either want to shoot with me, or give a nice response such as "Thank you for the compliment and request to shoot, but i'm not ready to shoot your style at this time".  Or something like this.  But, once in a while I get a response from a girl who says "NO THANK YOU, I WANT TO STAY CLASSY".   She is 5'4" and wants to shoot high fashion, but also puts in her details that she will shoot lingerie, swimsuit, erotic and body paint among other genres.  I thank you ladies who give a pleasant response whether it is yes, i want to shoot or no thank you.  I really appreciate you.  I know your not all going to say yes. 

Don

She will implode her own reputation, they always do...

Oct 09 12 04:37 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Natural Means
Posts: 521
Sydney, New South Wales, Australia


Had one model say "Sorry, but nothing in your portfolio 'speaks' to me".  Which i thought was a nice way to say she wanted to stay classy. And you know what? As my portfolio increases in class at its slow but steady rate, i reckon ill be working with her in about 2 years. Maybe 3.  :-)

A little bit of pleasentness keep options open in the future.
Oct 09 12 04:59 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Lovely Day Media
Posts: 3,694
Vineland, New Jersey, US


David Hyne wrote:
Had one model say "Sorry, but nothing in your portfolio 'speaks' to me".  Which i thought was a nice way to say she wanted to stay classy. And you know what? As my portfolio increases in class at its slow but steady rate, i reckon ill be working with her in about 2 years. Maybe 3.  :-)

A little bit of pleasentness keep options open in the future.

I don't think of it as lack of "class".  I think of it as they don't see enough creativity.  Well, part of that may be due to who one is working with at the time.  Another part may be what they were trying to accomplish.  If they don't see it, they don't see it, but I do think it's rude to say one wants to "stay classy".

  Maybe these people are turned off by nudity (if there is any in one's portfolio) and anyone who shoots them is "classless" in their opinion.  People are funny.  People here on MM are even funnier.

  I saw a casting call from a model looking for a TF maternity shoot.  I sent her a message.  She replied by saying that my pictures weren't good enough for her.  If I wanted to shoot with her anyway, I would have to pay her $200 an hour with a 2 hour minimum.  Needless to say, we didn't shoot.  Maybe my pictures weren't good enough at that time ... maybe they still aren't.  It doesn't mean I have no class, though.  I'd prefer to think of it as I lack equipment, experience and/or a creative eye that matches hers enough for us to work together..

Oct 09 12 05:07 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Isaiah Brink
Posts: 1,993
Charlotte, North Carolina, US


You know, I must admit as well, most of the models I've run into are polite, respectful, and just nice people to be around.  But in the last several months, I too have run into some very rude models, for lack of better word, but I realize that it's just a run of bad luck, and does not represent every person I've worked with, so I'll just press on, and keep in mind that most models are nice people and nice to be around.
Oct 09 12 05:15 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Oscar Partida
Posts: 729
San Diego, California, US


Eclectic Vision  wrote:

http://ic2.pbase.com/o4/97/388497/1/64021719.CHPTbjAb.applause.gif

haha in love with this

Oct 09 12 05:24 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
David Hirsh
Posts: 2,379
Toronto, Ontario, Canada


This is not a critique, but an observation: it doesn't take a stretch of the imagination to wonder what relevance there is being a nudist and giving women MASSAGE (your caps) for 12 years has to do with shooting photos.

You also go on to discuss the delight of models taking bubble baths while you shoot, and them "almost forgetting" they are supposed to be posing.

All this is fine, of course (and you certainly have the right to let the world know anything you want to). I am not suggesting you have anything other than the most honorable intentions. smile

However, as I mentioned, it seems to me that the info you have decided was appropriate for your profile could mistakenly be looked at as red flag material. You may want to try to redo it and see if you are 'judged' differently.
Oct 09 12 06:08 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
G Images
Posts: 253
Lexington, Kentucky, US


Augustine York wrote:
Hey she said "no thank you" right? ;P

That is much better than the impolite messages I have received from some models.

Oct 09 12 09:58 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
DMesser Photography
Posts: 1,288
Oceanside, California, US


Thank you all for your responses, even the critiques I wasn't really asking for.  The vast majority of models that have turned down my offer of photogrpahy have been ladies and considerate about it.  I am planning on adding more variety to my port, than just what I do right now.  I will also re-right my profile so it only talks about my photography.  As I said, thank you all, and I have learned from you all.  I will now consider this closed since i will no longer look at it. 

Don
Oct 10 12 12:41 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Don-Jones
Posts: 301
Memphis, Tennessee, US


If you can't learn to wade through the piss and vinegar, you're in the wrong business.
Oct 10 12 01:56 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Kit DeLite
Posts: 69
Westminster, California, US


David Hirsh wrote:
This is not a critique, but an observation: it doesn't take a stretch of the imagination to wonder what relevance there is being a nudist and giving women MASSAGE (your caps) for 12 years has to do with shooting photos.

You also go on to discuss the delight of models taking bubble baths while you shoot, and them "almost forgetting" they are supposed to be posing.

All this is fine, of course (and you certainly have the right to let the world know anything you want to). I am not suggesting you have anything other than the most honorable intentions. smile

However, as I mentioned, it seems to me that the info you have decided was appropriate for your profile could mistakenly be looked at as red flag material. You may want to try to redo it and see if you are 'judged' differently.

Just to add- You might want to make sure the messages you send to models don't push onto the side of inappropriate. Describing what you want to shoot is great as long as the details are of a professional nature and not awkward or uncomfortable.

Oct 10 12 03:23 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Teila K Day Photography
Posts: 1,919
Richmond, Indiana, US


DMesser Photography wrote:
Most of the models I contact either want to shoot with me, or give a nice response such as "Thank you for the compliment and request to shoot, but i'm not ready to shoot your style at this time".  Or something like this.  But, once in a while I get a response from a girl who says "NO THANK YOU, I WANT TO STAY CLASSY".   She is 5'4" and wants to shoot high fashion, but also puts in her details that she will shoot lingerie, swimsuit, erotic and body paint among other genres.  I thank you ladies who give a pleasant response whether it is yes, i want to shoot or no thank you.  I really appreciate you.  I know your not all going to say yes. 

Don

She wasn't rude.  She said "No thank you" and told you why.  Don't let your feelings get hurt just because she's being honest with you about how she feels.  Better in my  opinion than beating around the bush and giving you some sappy ridiculous sounding reason why she doesn't want to shoot with you.   She doesn't find your work "classy"?  Big deal.  Find another model.  That simple.

Perhaps it would be smarter to ask the model specifically what makes your work in her opinion "less-than-classy", so you can better market towards a broader model demographic if and when you choose.

No response = not rude and equals "no"

Her response = not rude

"I don't want to shoot because you freaking suck!!!" = rude and immature... she/he would be doing you a favor by not shooting with you.

"I'm not up for shooting because your photography doesn't fit me in the way I'd like to be portrayed" = not rude and is basically the long version of what she told you.

Being a photographer you're going to at one point or another get at least one rude comment.  Big deal.  You're not in first grade.  Forget it.  I probably would've forgot what she said 20 minutes after reading it as I would've already been sorting through other possible models to shoot.

Sticks and stones may break my bones.....    you know the rest.  Apply it.  wink

Oct 10 12 03:45 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Sandra Vixen
Posts: 710
Los Angeles, California, US


Having caps-lock on is already rude.

But like what the others have said, there will always be rude people, so click on the "next model" button. smile
Oct 10 12 03:51 pm  Link  Quote 
Artist/Painter
Two Pears Studio
Posts: 3,313
Wilmington, Delaware, US


Do yourself a favor... have someone who you trust to be objective to read your standard request to shoot... if they can't find any reason that someone might reply that way... then chalk it up to you can't please them all...

I just find that when an unusual number of people respond to me a certain way... and it is out of whack or context to my intent... sometimes it me and it helps to check it out. My guess is that they are just not responding to you and are responding to something going on in their life...
Oct 10 12 03:55 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Nikki Magnusson
Posts: 6,841
Las Vegas, Nevada, US


http://a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/139/e5b3eeb90b9946099aa6e258e7b6ca78/l.gifhttp://a3.ec-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/144/c2bbe541f833422584d61b8f85bfdc4b/l.gifhttp://a3.l3-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/138/l_5e6cd402190f47419bab38b038a086e0.jpg
Oct 10 12 04:05 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
g2-new photographics
Posts: 1,928
Boston, Massachusetts, US


Being essentially retired now, I have the more-or-less luxury of working mainly (realistically not very often) only with models who contact me.

smile

With that being said, though, I rarely had rude replies when I contacted models (although that was usually with established/experienced models.)
Oct 10 12 04:23 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
The F-Stop
Posts: 1,421
New York, New York, US


At least she answered. Rude is when they just ignore ya.
Oct 10 12 07:02 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
MoRina
Posts: 5,594
Fort Lauderdale, Florida, US


G Images wrote:

That is much better than the impolite messages I have received from some models.

Hard to believe someone could be rude to you.  You are one of the good ones!

Oct 10 12 08:37 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Jerry Nemeth
Posts: 26,734
Dearborn, Michigan, US


Jessie Shannon wrote:

Oct 10 12 08:39 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Aaliyah Love
Posts: 113
Los Angeles, California, US


L Bass wrote:

i just wouldn't of responded at all to her or maybe even blocked her. Why even bother to start/continue a dialog with a rude.unprofessional person. You already know all you need to know about her! Next!

..but, I do like this quote too;)

Oct 15 12 02:12 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Andrew Thomas Evans
Posts: 23,842
Minneapolis, Minnesota, US


DMesser Photography wrote:
Most of the models I contact either want to shoot with me, or give a nice response such as "Thank you for the compliment and request to shoot, but i'm not ready to shoot your style at this time".  Or something like this.  But, once in a while I get a response from a girl who says "NO THANK YOU, I WANT TO STAY CLASSY".   She is 5'4" and wants to shoot high fashion, but also puts in her details that she will shoot lingerie, swimsuit, erotic and body paint among other genres.  I thank you ladies who give a pleasant response whether it is yes, i want to shoot or no thank you.  I really appreciate you.  I know your not all going to say yes. 

Don

That's awesome!

But then let's go on a thread where a model asks to change paperwork, bring an escort, bring a friend/escort unannounced, etc and we will get a bunch of "NO", "NEXT", and other rude things.

But OMG it's a big deal of a model does that to us!



Andrew Thomas Evans
www.andrewthomasevans.com

Oct 15 12 07:20 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Mark
Posts: 2,889
New York, New York, US


She may be rude but she's correct
Oct 15 12 10:27 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
DAN CRUIKSHANK
Posts: 1,784
Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada


I'm afraid you are in the wrong business if you can't take blunt rejection... pretty sure models deal with it every day.
Oct 15 12 10:41 pm  Link  Quote 
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