login info join!
Forums > Off-Topic Discussion > SF2: Ess Effin Two > Happies Search   Reply
Model
Dead account
Posts: 1,291
Sydney, New South Wales, Australia


Uni starts up again super soon. I'm pretty damn keen to get back to a regular routine of books and friends. But it makes me sad to think of where I was this time last year..

I had just moved in with my boyfriend into our own flat, three minutes from the university. I was working at EB Games. I had just gotten my license and I was planning my eighteenth birthday. My boyfriend and I were so incredibly crazy in love too, which was amazing.

Now.. I'm living at my mums house again. I'm not having a party or going out or anything to celebrate my nineteenth. I will travel over an hour to and from my Uni three days a week. Oh and my absolutely polar opposite to me sister is back in the country and is coming to stay.

I don't actually know whether or not I've grown as a person. I feel less likely to just go out and do something because I want to. Less confident in myself. And I'm jealous of how my previous relationship felt, even though I'm with the same man again much has changed. I probably have less money now than I did then. I've less friends that I feel close to...

Gosh, this was supposed to be a happy comparison. One thing that's a semi positive is that if my relationship ended tomorrow I wouldn't be that torn up about it. We are on different paths and I am not moving to Japan with him when he goes in six months time. I don't even know if my body has really improved that much over the year... my boobs are bigger though so I guess that's a win.

Oh well, I'm one step closer to being a 20 year old with a uni degree. Hopefully next year I'll have my own place again. My new fish are cool.
Feb 22 13 03:09 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
DougBPhoto
Posts: 37,960
Portland, Oregon, US


When people are young, they just want to get older.

Once people start getting older and discover what it is like, they miss how things were when they were younger.

It sounds like you're discovering the ebbs and flows of life, and why it is important to focus on the things that make us happy.

You've got tons of potential and a lot of people here adore you, so don't forget to include that in your reflections.

Can't complain about the bigger boobs either!!  (Yeah, like that was gonna go untouched)  tongue
Feb 22 13 03:26 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Dead account
Posts: 1,291
Sydney, New South Wales, Australia


DougBPhoto wrote:
When people are young, they just want to get older.

*lots of nice things*

But I don't haha. I want to appreciate my youth out on my own, learning things for myself, enjoying uni life etc. I feel as if I'm wasting my time here, but I do need to save and I miss my little sister when I move away.

Feb 22 13 05:46 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
California Girls Skate
Posts: 343
Los Angeles, California, US


Mary Thomson wrote:
I feel as if I'm wasting my time here...

Of course you do. Because you have ambition. Ironically, the people in this world who never feel like they are wasting their lives, are the ones totally wasting them.

Those with drive and a sense pf purpose are often plagued by a sense of urgency. You want to accomplish things in life and you want to do those thing NOW. Not in 3 years or 5 or 10.

That desire has NOTHING to do with wanting to grow older. Age has nothing to do with it. It's caused by being keenly aware that, regardless of age, you only have a few decades upon this earth to accomplish anything. So you better get moving...

Feb 22 13 05:57 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Dead account
Posts: 1,291
Sydney, New South Wales, Australia


^^ I love everything you wrote California. I've 10 days before university resumes. I'm working this evening, and tomorrow afternoon from 12. I'll find out my shifts for next week tomorrow. I've spent the majority of my day doing yoga between loading email attachments. I hate just sitting around waiting for things to happen.
Feb 22 13 06:05 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
DougBPhoto
Posts: 37,960
Portland, Oregon, US


Mary Thomson wrote:

But I don't haha. I want to appreciate my youth out on my own, learning things for myself, enjoying uni life etc. I feel as if I'm wasting my time here, but I do need to save and I miss my little sister when I move away.

Kinda my point... you've outgrown young...

however, you are right, in what you aspire to and unfortunately these kinds of things are things we all need to go through, and often help to appreciate our day-to-day lives more and what we need to do to alter/improve them.

I'm not worried about you, I know you are going places.

(Hopefully, those places include here, LOL)

Feb 22 13 09:13 pm  Link  Quote 
  Search   Reply



main | browse | casting/travel | forums | shout box | help | advertising | contests | share | join the mayhem

more modelmayhem on: | | | edu

©2006-2014 ModelMayhem.com. All Rights Reserved.
MODEL MAYHEM is a registered trademark.
Toggle Worksafe Mode: Off | On
Terms | Privacy | Careers