Ms Eryka wrote:
what site if you dont mind?

POF.com (Plenty of Fish)

For the most part it's identical to OK Cupid with many of the same faces and attitudes on both sites.  I don't think it's any better or any worse, just different.

Chris Rifkin wrote:
I think a few of us should be trolls and sign up on one of those Millionaire.com dating sites

They're scams. They take guys who pay to join sex sites like "Fling" or "Be Naughty" and girls who pay to join "Wealthy Men" and mush them together.

"What? You're not rich??!! What do mean all you want is to get laid?!" and vice versa...

Ms Eryka wrote:
smh.. i get random old white guys asking me my bra size

I got that, too. The comic book thing annoyed me more, though. (Probably because people have been asking me the bra question since 6th grade. Do I think it's acceptable? No.)

MS Foto wrote:
It's been a bit different lately since they were aquired by Match.com. They've got some "crazy blind date" thing they've trying to roll out. Online dating is scarey enough, but a blind date with someone from the internet? NTY....

There is something inherently unnerving about this "crazy blind date" and I'm not sure many people would enjoy it. I'm dating someone long-term, so this isn't really something that would affect me, but if I WAS single, it would set off so many alarm bells for me.

Connor Photography wrote:
Haha.... soooo it is not the others; it is YOU with a high bar.

May be you haven't bumped into the ones whom you are willing to become a princess.  I am sure the day will come.  Keep flirting. 

....I'd rather be Batman....I'll wait for the one who makes me feel as awesome as  Batman

Select Models wrote:
WOW... just found out that someone I've been dating for a few months (also a model on MM) is on OKCupid.  Hmmmmmm... what would you do?...

If you want to be exclusive then establish it.
Until then, you both are dating:)

Not everyone dates one person at a time.
Eggs in one basket is risky for some.

Ben Hinman wrote:
Tried it. Full of:
-Fat girls with fake pictures
-Girls that are to afraid to meet someone they've never met but not afraid to tell someone they've never met they are in love with them
-Average girls who never get hit on in real life but online revel in a slew of exaggerated compliments from horny perverts

Anyone worthwhile is immediately lost in a sea of trust issues, misandry and perversion. Since worthwhile people don't waste their time on those kind of things, they often leave just as soon as they join.

1 evening in a club gives you 10x the chance of getting laid of an entire year of online dating.

Damon Banner wrote:

Yes.  I make every woman I meet, ever, suck on my toes. 

Select Models wrote:
WOW... just found out that someone I've been dating for a few months (also a model on MM) is on OKCupid.  Hmmmmmm... what would you do?...

be thankful you didn't see her on millionaire.com?

That sucks bro

Chris Rifkin wrote:


be thankful you didn't see her on millionaire.com?

That sucks bro

I haven't blown the whistle on her yet.  She's actually taking me to the movies tonight AND PAYING!  Might not wanna messup a good thing... ...

Ms Eryka wrote:
so I'm guilty.

I'm on okcupid and i havent met a lot of guys because they either flake or just disappear ..


anyone else on okcupid?

how are your experiences??


p.s. okcupid put out a study that black women get the least amount of replies from white men (which are the preferred mating choice by women overall on the site) and black men.

Dang. What about the latinos ?? heh. I've never even seen the site honestly, but everyone's talking about it, saying they're on. I rmbr it it was shameful to say such a thing, (kinda like 2nd hand shopping) and now, you aren't COOl unless you DO!

Almost makes me think of it. But then 2 things strike my mind. 1 I still don't like the idea of having my mug out there in that way. (maybe do a pic with the head chopp'd off?) You ever see those people who look the same years later? Yeaaahh.... I'll be 30 and someone'll be like "Oh You still single, baby? I saw you on that site on day!!"

And 2, this may sound a lil conceited but bare with me... You ever meet someone & they fall head over heels for you before you've said one sentence?? Well I've experienced it a lot (and you models prob do all the time!) and I'm afraid I'll get all these emails from horny men who say even the most innocuous pic and went straight to my inbox without reading a goddamn thing I posted on my page and seeing if we were at all compatible. It makes me pretty angry actually at this age, having guys profess love when they don't even know me as a person. I'm a human being capable of compatibility or incompatibility, not a goddamn piece of art/commodity. If someone can actually take a vested interest in getting to know you (reading your profile in this case), and THEN liking what they see (read), and your looks are the icing on the otherwise delicious cake, perfect! But I guess (generally speaking), the man will look first, listen later, and the women vice versa.

I guess I could omit a photo altogether but then people may assume I'm actually older or not the correct body type listed, or unattractive, and pass my profile entirely.

And 3, this is def a double standard, but I would wonder in the back of my mind, at least for a man, what brings him as a man on a dating site (besides either a)less desirable for whatever reason b)instant access to plenty women and their photos for sex). A women I would just assume was curious or lonely or a million better reasons.



Oh wells. No online dating for me I guess?

Also, are any of these sites free? And what are the general ages of say, most of the suitors on POF?

Model Sarah wrote:
Yep. It's fun. Met my last long term boyfriend on there who is now a friend.

You get what you put out there. My profile is both intimidating and hilarious which I think weeds out the people who are complete idiots.....

but for the most part it's just a hilarious social experiment for me.

Sounds like something I would do/create. Maybe still will now that you word it like that! I love social experiments!

JaneyGarnet wrote:
I got a lot of dates on okcupid.  Most of them never got past the first date, but in several months I met my current boyfriend.  We've been together a year so far, and it's going great. I like okcupid because it offers more scope for literacy.  I'd rather have a good conversationalist than a pretty face.

But that's just how I like my men. Gorgeous but dim models, feel free to hit me up!

Oh SNAP! ahahahaha...pics!

Ararity wrote:
You ever meet someone & they fall head over heels for you before you've said one sentence?? Well I've experienced it a lot (and you models prob do all the time!)

Um, no. Getting someone to notice me generally required doing a lot of extra stuff - like bringing boxes of homemade cookies to the place where they worked, or having a mutual friend just tell them that I liked them, or writing them cute notes and sticking it in their bag or jacket pocket when they weren't paying attention (did that a few times).  In the situation of being out in public, I would pretty much always notice someone and approach them first, and try to seem really sweet and smart, because I knew that otherwise, they would just disappear off into the night with someone taller and bustier, without ever talking to me - and I really, really thought they looked too interesting to pass up on.

It's always been on me, for the most part. At least from a short distance, I can be easily mistaken for a teenager, or someone who is "just too young," so part of getting attention, or asked out for a date, required me to come across *seeming* my age, and/or seeming mature for my age, so a 20 or 30 something single person wouldn't just ignore me, assuming I was "jailbait" (yeah, it's happened). And, no, I'm not joking. Being a tiny person, with a youthful-looking face, it's HARD to get taken seriously. I photograph like someone in my 20s; I LOOK like I'm a kid to most people in the real world.

Ararity wrote:
And 3, this is def a double standard, but I would wonder in the back of my mind, at least for a man, what brings him as a man on a dating site (besides either a)less desirable for whatever reason b)instant access to plenty women and their photos for sex). A women I would just assume was curious or lonely or a million better reasons.

The same reason women do it. For me at least (and yeah, I know I'm female and you're talking about dudes), I have no nearby social connections, and no connected network of friends in the area where I live, because I moved here in 2008, and worked/traveled a lot the first few years of my residence in this state. I have SOME friends, but they are all scattered throughout New England. My social network is fragmented, due to circumstance, and seeing them all irregularly so there's no one to introduce me to their friends, not in any realistic way.  Also, some areas of the country are "colder" socially, and not relationship-friendly. I would definitely say that about the Boston area. There are some really good-hearted people here, and almost everyone is basically pretty nice if you need to ask someone for directions, or you get a flat tire on the highway, or whatever --- but, in other ways, people are pretty cliquish and closed off, so it's harder to meet people than it was in the Southeast, where young people were just more emotionally open, and seemingly took greater risks in terms of opening up to new friends/companionships.

Ben Hinman wrote:
1 evening in a club gives you 10x the chance of getting laid of an entire year of online dating.

You're doing something wrong.......very wrong.

Chris Rifkin wrote:
I think a few of us should be trolls and sign up on one of those Millionaire.com dating sites

I can give you five reasons not to do that

Jules NYC wrote:
After so many times me making the effort and providing a wonderland for a guy just to spend money in gas just to get to me... Ugh

Cheap fucker....
I'da tossed in dinner and some Skittles along with the gas for that.

Small Fruit Pits wrote:

Cheap fucker....
I'da tossed in dinner and some Skittles along with the gas for that.

I know, right?

Sophistocles wrote:
It goes both ways.

There are women on such sites who, like the men who want to eschew courtship, want to bypass the preliminaries and get right to the "gimme, buyme, takeme."

That said, this isn't exclusive to dating sites. It happens in "real life" situations as well.

They call those types 'dinner whores'

Big difference from wanting a courtship.
A courtship is about knowing a person.

As for the money thing, I 'get' it.

http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=LQ7wT4CU … Q7wT4CUprQ

Jules NYC wrote:
They call those types 'dinner whores'

If only dinner was all they wanted...

These days, if I meet someone new, and the first question is, "so, what do you do?" I make something up.

I think women have it harder on dating sites, though. The equivalent, as sexist as it might be to note, would be deliberately using a bad picture to fend off guys who just want looks for sex.

Sophistocles wrote:

If only dinner was all they wanted...

These days, if I meet someone new, and the first question is, "so, what do you do?" I make something up.

I think women have it harder on dating sites, though. The equivalent, as sexist as it might be to note, would be deliberately using a bad picture to fend off guys who just want looks for sex.

I currently do nothing.  That can be a problem.

Sophistocles wrote:
If only dinner was all they wanted...

These days, if I meet someone new, and the first question is, "so, what do you do?" I make something up.

I think women have it harder on dating sites, though. The equivalent, as sexist as it might be to note, would be deliberately using a bad picture to fend off guys who just want looks for sex.

Some people don't know how to make conversation so they ask typical questions like that.
Some people are genuinely interested in what you do.

Great to talk about if you love your job, not so much if you don't.

If the questions are paired with "What car do you drive?" then you may want to alter your course unless you live in Los Angeles

Dishonesty is never a good method to end a date you don't like.

BlueMoonPics wrote:

I currently do nothing.  That can be a problem.

The guy I speak of didn't have a job.
I knew he'd get one so that wasn't my concern.

It was how he treated me.

Jules NYC wrote:
Nowadays people use dating sites because they are too lazy to make the effort to know someone and glaringly stuck in fear to make any small commitment, even proclaim  'boyfriend-girlfriend' stature.

I don't see how using a dating site is lazy.  You make a profile, you scope out people of interest, you strike up a conversation, you meet up, and then you get to know each other.  It's really no different than going out to meet someone, except instead of putting on makeup and getting dressed up, you're creating a profile.  And shit, if there is a first date, you're getting all gussied up anyway.  (or at least I would hope so)

I met my now boyfriend on OKC.  He moved to my area a year ago and works from home, so his friend base is pretty limited.  I also work from home, and my clients are all married people, so I'm not exactly meeting a potential partner at work.  So we joined the site to meet new people and maybe find someone worth dating. 

We talked online for a week, and then moved to texting while he was on a work trip to California.  When he got back from his trip, he scheduled dinner plans, and we did the typical date thing.  We got along great, he invited me to dessert the next night, and then we watched a football game because our favorite team was playing.  Then we kept hanging out, going on dates, made it offical within the week, met each others friends, and that's that.  We're very much at the 'couple state' of knowing each other.

It's really not all that different than typical dating once you get to the actual 'meet up' stage.  Of course online dating does complicate things, it can be a virtual smorgasbord of people that you're making snap judgments on...but hey, isn't that basically the modus operandi of the bar scene?

I do agree that dating overall has gotten a bit more lazy, just meeting at people's houses, or meeting up in a large group instead of doing the dinner and conversation thing, but that's certainly not just an online thing.

Laura Ann - Fashion wrote:

I don't see how using a dating site is lazy.  You make a profile, you scope out people of interest, you strike up a conversation, you meet up, and then you get to know each other.  It's really no different than going out to meet someone, except instead of putting on makeup and getting dressed up, you're creating a profile.  And shit, if there is a first date, you're getting all gussied up anyway.  (or at least I would hope so)

I met my now boyfriend on OKC.  He moved to my area a year ago and works from home, so his friend base is pretty limited.  I also work from home, and my clients are all married people, so I'm not exactly meeting a potential partner at work.  So we joined the site to meet new people and maybe find someone worth dating. 

We talked online for a week, and then moved to texting while he was on a work trip to California.  When he got back from his trip, he scheduled dinner plans, and we did the typical date thing.  We got along great, he invited me to dessert the next night, and then we watched a football game because our favorite team was playing.  Then we kept hanging out, going on dates, made it offical within the week, met each others friends, and that's that.  We're very much at the 'couple state' of knowing each other.

It's really not all that different than typical dating once you get to the actual 'meet up' stage.  Of course online dating does complicate things, it can be a virtual smorgasbord of people that you're making snap judgments on...but hey, isn't that basically the modus operandi of the bar scene?

I do agree that dating overall has gotten a bit more lazy, just meeting at people's houses, or meeting up in a large group instead of doing the dinner and conversation thing, but that's certainly not just an online thing.

I had the same intent as you but my experience was different.
I'm happy for you that your experience was different.

Jules NYC wrote:
There used to be a time when a guy would come to your house, pick you up and drive you somewhere other than HIS house for a date (if he didn't ask you to drive there yourself).

He would then take you somewhere fun, perhaps dinner was involved... we do like to eat with someone we like you know...

The course of the evening would be enjoyable and you would be driven home without being pressured for sex.

They will still do this - generally until they get into your pants. Then, it gets super-fun for a few weeks, followed by them swiftly losing interest in you, just at the point where you start feeling comfortable enough to begin really trusting them.

I always hated the "hanging out" culture that dating has evolved into. I don't want to "hang out" with someone, at their house - watching while they play video games and take bong hits - if I don't even know them yet. It's kind of uncomfortable to me. You don't have to spend money on taking me out somewhere; I will make a picnic, because I like to cook, and we can take it to a park somewhere and eat, and that's absolutely free. Know how many times I've wanted to do that with people, and they couldn't even manage to get out of fucking bed before 4pm to go with me???

I've always been a pretty loving, good-natured person, but this past year, I've developed some serious misanthropic tendencies.

Koryn Locke wrote:

They will still do this - generally until they get into your pants. Then, it gets super-fun for a few weeks, followed by them swiftly losing interest in you, just at the point where you start feeling comfortable enough to begin really trusting them.

I always hated the "hanging out" culture that dating has evolved into. I don't want to "hang out" with someone, if I don't even know them yet. It's kind of uncomfortable to me. You don't have to spend money on taking me out somewhere; I will make a picnic, because I like to cook, and we can take it to a park somewhere and eat, and that's absolutely free. Know how many times I've wanted to do that with people, and they couldn't even manage to get out of fucking bed before 4pm to go with me???

I've always been a pretty loving, good-natured person, but this past year, I've developed some serious misanthropic tendencies.

I am with you on this 100%!

PS, picnics are awesome and super sweet.

http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=mHCuPfb4 … HCuPfb4QA0