Okay, seems James Frey is too busy to write my bio so here goes...
I started out quite a number of years ago as an assistant to a Mr. Stieglitz at 291 Gallery where I was promptly fired for removing the landscape portion from a number of his quite nice cloud shots.
Then, after much bumming around on my own, I was hired by the Farm Security Administration. For a number of months I travelled with a Ms. Dorothea Lange until I was fired for beating up a couple of migrant workers who I swore had been trespassing. Unfortunately I had misunderstood the “Farm Security" part of my employment.
I soon headed “West young man" and found myself in Carmel. With my impressive resume, I was quickly hired as a studio assistant for one Mr. Weston. Unfortunately, this job didn’t last that long either when it was discovered that I had replaced his meticulously arranged still life with a garden variety pepper. It was beginning to dawn on me that photographers and artists didn’t have much of a sense of humor.
For the next couple of decades I bummed around, hitchhiking my way back and forth across the country. During that time I saved a Mr. Frank a ton of embarrassment as he had thought for years that he was actually in Canada and was going to produce a book called The Canadians. Later, during another ride, as a joke, I replaced all of a Mr. Eggleston’s black & white film with a bunch of new color stuff. I’m fairly sure he appreciated the joke.
Inspired by Robert Capa and his ilk, I traveled to Viet Nam as a war photographer. Unbeknownst to me, the war had been over for quite some time. On my return to the states, I spent the next few years in and out of VA hospitals and drug rehab. Upon recovery, I eventually published a well-received book entitled “War is Hell - to Photograph".
I later found myself in New York and was soon hired at a place called The Factory working as a photographer for a chap named Andrew Warhol. Well, it only took a few minutes to realize what a complete hack he was so I tried to drown him in a large can of tomato soup. Unfortunately I photographed the event and, as it soon appeared on Esquire magazine's cover, I was shortly arrested and sent to prison.
Upon release, I procured employment as Tammy Faye Baker’s makeup artist until I was able to get enough money together to open this studio. So there you have it. A life probably not that unlike your own.
Rates available for model/actor portfolios upon request.
Accepting select TFP/CD.