ok -- so I have very thick, yet smooth, hair.. after pregnancy it got a little wavy but is going back to normal (straight)

Growing up in the 80's, I've done just about every hairstyle I could do - short, long, layers, perms etc etc....

the problem I have is with the salons I've been going to -- and I try to be loyal at least for a few cuts...

I wear my hair in a bob, just below shoulders and bangs.. when I keep it one length I love it but I hate it in pictures - it just is my big face surrounded by two hunks of hair (nice hair but still just these two huge hanks)

so, I went to get a cut and I showed her a picture of the actress from the B in apt whatever -- and the bob she has has 'internal' layers that when styled straight will look one length but when wanted you have the ability to curl it... so, I asked her if this was something that would actually work and what did she think etc etc...  so, she does the cut -- we went up a few inches (just skimming shoulders) and she turns me away from the mirror... like a schmuck, I'd like to trust her, so I go with it...  she doesn't keep the angle on the corners....ugh...  then it's still looking ok layer wise and then she freakin' goes into with those stupid thinning shears... I hate those stupid things because, now, my hair has these huge stupid gaps in it - like literally, if you pull the hair between your fingers or with a brush, there are actually parts with about an inch to an inch and a half discrepency....  and the 'layers' are starting at about 5" inches from the crown...  and the additional bangs she added? heavily weighted towards one side - like not evenly placed at all....

I'm so distressed because I actually really like this woman and she has done nice cuts for me in the past....

I've had this since last week and I'm just so upset...   I'm 44 years old, I really don't want to live with a bad cut... the only option is grow it or cut it even shorter...

please help me out? how can I talk to her without sounding like a complete bitch?