Star wrote:

no. I would elaborate- but just no.

Uh-huh. I thought not. Oh, Star you can elaborate if you like? What? Need my okay? You have my okay to critique me and my work if you like? Rip me up. Tell me a critique would not be worth your time -- just let me comment in return.

RBM Photo wrote:

your first three images are a bit trite. However your second two look like maybe you are starting to find where you want to go. I especially do not like your avatar, it does not showcase the quality your photos could have.

I would weed down your portfolio to just the best images, if you do that you will get a better quality of model and that is the goal, isn't it? To work with people who bring your game up.

These are the ones you should keep



for now, hopefully you will replace will something better in the next year or so



go back to the raw file and bring out the shadows, you can then use the tools in lightroom to control exactly where your shadow fall off is. Right now it just doesn't read the way it could with a bit more finessing





lose the spot on her face and let it all be black. A white vigniette might be good

also add these ones in

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid … =3&theater

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid … =3&theater

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid … =3&theater

Right now your models are controlling the images more than you are. And there is no reason to not go dark, but if you are going dark go dark. Don't play act at darkness, find it in them. Make them sit still, or have them breath quick but shallow breaths, just find a way to make it about your direction and your focus and not them wanting to play at being a vampire.

Also styling is an issue for you, the images of death you have a velvet cloak. That, IMO cheapens the feel of the images. The cloak feels velure, it doesn't feel like death incarnate.

I would start shopping for vintage dresses. Damaged vintage is your friend, you can destroy it and nobody cares.

These images may not be the best in my portfolio, but I think you can see where the darker side meets fashion (which is kinda what I do) but still shows an emotion. Model is Kickham, she is wearing a vintage slip in some and a vintage aerialist costume in others. They are lightroom processed with no photoshop retouching.









this one is a stilt walker on break from a video shoot, I added in the necklace from the wardrobe stylist and did some stills behind the studio



I know I don't do your exact same type of work, but I wanted to give you examples of ways to style etc... that might give you a bit more gold than brass. Finding a way to work with models is different for each person, but once you find that way you will be in a position to consistently create work you are proud of.

Dean Johnson Photo wrote:

She already said no. Please stop trolling.

Thanks

I just asked a question? Asking for a clarification is not "...trolling." I just asked a follow-up question.

Star wrote:

Paul you haven't found a voice yet. You seem to be either looking at other people's work and attempting to emulate it or just plain not reaching far enough yet. The most important thing you will learn is how to pair a model with a concept. Until then you aren't ready for a critique.

Thank you, I appreciate the comments, and I have to admit I agree, I have mostly been working on technical aspects, and have been searching for a transition to bring in vision.

Star wrote:
Also styling is an issue for you, the images of death you have a velvet cloak. That, IMO cheapens the feel of the images. The cloak feels velure, it doesn't feel like death incarnate.

I would start shopping for vintage dresses. Damaged vintage is your friend, you can destroy it and nobody cares.

Absolutely, my original intent for that concept was to use a decorative black Edwardian dress I purchased, but it arrived much smaller than I thought it was, probably was a child's dress. It did not fit and the cloak was the only other thing I had that would work. I am working on creating a better costume for that concept.