Model
Malina van Leuven
Posts: 86
Brussels, Brussels, Belgium
I am soon going to change my profile text and was wondering what your thoughts and advice would be. Thank you in advance because you seem to keep this going even if it must require lots of efforts. Greets!
Model
Tremmy
Posts: 19
Nairobi, Nairobi, Kenya
your opinion would be appreciated!
Model
Cheyenne Demus
Posts: 8
Chicago, Illinois, US
Can I get an opinion please?
Clothing Designer
Necia C
Posts: 4
Ventura, California, US
Model
Zoe Harlotta
Posts: 28
Manchester, England, United Kingdom
I was wondering on whether I could get some advice on my bio Thanks
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
Malinaa wrote: I am soon going to change my profile text and was wondering what your thoughts and advice would be. Thank you in advance because you seem to keep this going even if it must require lots of efforts. Greets! Malinaa, Everything in your bio is fine except for this sentence, which doesn't make sense: "Modeling and acting is something I do besides studying for the simple reason that I enjoy it and want to develop it as professional as possible, so I can spend more time within this industry." What I think you're trying to say is, "In addition to modeling and acting, I like to study because I like it." Since the sentence doesn't add much impact to your bio anyway, you could take it out and be just fine. Good luck to you!
Model
M A U I
Posts: 1587
Harare, Harare, Zimbabwe
I would say it has a fun and a serious side although I would love some opinions..
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
Tremmy wrote: your opinion would be appreciated! Hi Tremmy, The biggest statement that jumps out at me for improvement is this one: "I am currently interested in 'enhancing' my portfolio. there is not much at the moment, but a journey of a thousand miles always has 'the first step'... I believe I will get there." To me, this could be interpreted that you are happy wandering around those thousand miles and enhancement will just happen along the way. A potential client might be turned away by the idea that it is entirely on them to give you direction. Wandering isn't bad; it's a great way to seek out who you want to become. But having some direction or at least a vision in mind so you know when you've discovered that someone--that's important too. Instead, maybe something like this reflects what you actually meant to say: "I am always looking for unique ideas to enhance my portfolio on this journey of a thousand miles." ...It's not amazing but it might get you started. Good luck!
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
Cheyenne Demus wrote: Can I get an opinion please? Cheyenne, Your bio has a good skeleton, but I don't think it reflects the message you're trying to send. Grammatical mistakes are the most blaring; I'm not saying you need to be a spectacular writer but following the basic rules will improve your perceived credibility. Your main message seems to be professionalism in all situations. If that is the case, I'd take out smiley faces and fix that grammar. Sentences begin with a capital letter and end with a period, a space comes before the next one, etc. You mention you are a perfectionist. Making these changes will demonstrate that much more clearly. If I were to summarize your bio, I'd start with something like this: "I am easy going, enthusiastic, and punctual. I'm always keen to add creative concepts, implied nude, body part modeling, and anything commercial. While I have tons of ideas I work hard to be open-minded and achieve your project's vision. I have experience in acting, promotional modeling, fashion shows, music videos, and hair shows. I can travel up to ___ miles from Chicago without any extra fees. Respect my time and I'll respect yours. If you're serious, contact me!" Like I said, it doesn't have to be an English graduate paper. It should still sound like you. Good luck out there!
Model
E L I N
Posts: 199
Montreal, Quebec, Canada
I'd like to have your input on this please
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
Necia C wrote:
I like how concise your bio is. One note: Swavorski = Swarovski
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
Harlotti wrote: I was wondering on whether I could get some advice on my bio Thanks Harlotti, My suggestion for you is to shorten your opening paragraph to not include how long you've been modeling or the locale of the photographers you've modeled for. Why, you ask? Because ultimately, in the end, all a potential client cares about is results. Taking that extra info out leaves more opportunity for a client to read about what you really want them to know about you: that you have experience in certain genres and are looking to expand the quality of your list. Something like, "I'm interested in modeling lingerie and anything fetish. My wardrobe is very diverse and includes alternative clothing options such as latex items and a prom and wedding dress that can all be used to make magic happen," helps draw a clearer picture of what you have to offer--and it sounds like a lot. I hope this helps.
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
Randy Potvin wrote: I'd like to know! Hi Randy, Your bio has good bones but sounds a little cookie-cutter. Networking, expanding portfolio, being easy to work with--these are all great goals and qualities to have, but to stand out it you need to be more specific. For example: "To achieve my dream to be an actor and model, I'm here to network and build a portfolio that stuns. While I include some ideas in a list below, I'm willing to try anything that will help me achieve my goal." It's your dream; fight for it! Good luck.
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
M A U I wrote: I would say it has a fun and a serious side although I would love some opinions..
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
E L I N wrote: I'd like to have your input on this please Elin, I like that your portfolio is simple and straight forward. You include pertinent details and organized it well. Good luck!
Model
Axioma
Posts: 6822
Antwerp, Antwerp, Belgium
Did an update, would love a review
Model
Heather Smythe
Posts: 367
Sacramento, California, US
Very interested
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
Axioma wrote: Did an update, would love a review Axi, You've chosen an interesting format for your bio and I kind of like that. Because its broken up that way I had to read it more carefully--which isn't a bad thing.
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
Heather Smythe wrote: Very interested Heather, Do you work in business? Your bio reads like a portfolio update--and that's not a bad thing. That means its simple, specific, and only includes applicable information. It encourages me as a reader to spend more time looking at your portfolio rather than trying to pick out the important stuff.
Photographer
Wendy Hurst Portrait
Posts: 249
Riverton, Utah, US
Meghan Devlin wrote: I wonder. Great bio! Enthusiastic, high energy, positive and clear. Those are all attributes I look for when hiring a model. Excellent text here, don't change a thing.
Model
VeronicaB
Posts: 97
San Francisco, California, US
Model
Celine Sophia
Posts: 503
Santa Barbara, California, US
oops sorry didnt see my previous post. My turn yet?
Model
AlexaRose
Posts: 29
Spokane, Washington, US
I'd love to know
Model
D A N I
Posts: 4627
Little Rock, Arkansas, US
Please take a look at mine. Thanks
Photographer
The Dave
Posts: 8848
Ann Arbor, Michigan, US
Yes please
Model
CallMeKate
Posts: 1
Ewa Beach, Hawaii, US
I would love to hear you opinions and advice. Thank you!
Model
CambriaPlusModel
Posts: 47
Los Angeles, California, US
I would love to know what you think
Model
H E F F
Posts: 141
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, US
Would love to hear what you think.
Model
JTModels
Posts: 7
Seattle, Washington, US
Model
TiffanyLesley
Posts: 84
Brisbane, Queensland, Australia
I've just recently updated my bio and would love to see what you think
Model
Clearly Clarissa
Posts: 51
Kitchener, Ontario, Canada
Over here! Please and thank you!
Photographer
Gene Balitski
Posts: 24
Los Angeles, California, US
Wendy, I am having a real hard time writing my bio. I can express myself visually, but verbally is a problem. Can you take a look at my port? Let me know what you think. Thanks a lot!
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