I like the photo. Like the multi-colored highlights and the ambiance. To add a little more photographic intimacy I would of cropped the photo from the top cutting off part of her hair so it brings the focus point down to the face to push the look through.

The wax (or whatever it is) creates kind of an odd-looking, awkward shape on her right breast.

I dig the tones though.

And the 'story' is?

I don't 'get' it.

Just my opinion.

It feels "forced". Like, for example, you had the concept but not the execution.  Between the angle, the the way the model is posed and the way she is made up it feels very thrown together in the wrong way. Are you aiming for a theme, a feeling and mood or just an image thats different in some way?

In ye olde industry there is a saying. Sometimes less is more.

Again, I feel like you have a concept in mind, you have some kind of story you might want to tell or some kind of emotion you want to get across. Or not, I dont know, because the image just kind sits there not knowing whats what. And we certainly can't guess.

Technically, the crop mixed with that angle throws me off center. Nothing at all that leaps out. The lighting doesnt grab me either.

Sorry to sound harsh, but you caught me in a wordy crit mood. Cheers