Amadea T wrote:
Rohypnol.
Seven cats.

I'm the queen of practical jokes. You don't wanna piss me off.

I wish I had the balls to play practical jokes. I'm a broody, pissy kind of person who can hold a grudge for a very long time. So I'm a bit afraid of how I may handle it in the future. Ha

I would love a cat... Boyfriend is highly allergic, and we have 3 rats. But we should have a dog soon!

Amadea T wrote:
RATS!!!!??!?!?!


Even much more better with the practical joke thing...used to have three boys myself...

Hahah yes Rats. They are pretty adorable.


My brothers were good at practical jokes, sometimes. I've always been terrible. But maybe I should try anyway. ha I don't think she can hate me any more than she already does.

Vintagevista wrote:
Sure she can - BUT >A real friend doesn't pull shitty stuff like that.

in Roomate situations, you put up with it and knuckle under (now that THEY have made the first move) -  - or you respond forcefully and make it clear that they don't get a second move - - other than moving out.

Property management does not approve of unknown people living permanently in a place - They are obligated to know who resides in an apartment.  Your lease should spell it out. 

You two might just find your own place - since you both can pay rent - and get "thrown out" when your landlord finds out about the squatter.  Leaving her and the squatter to figure it out.

Like I said - you might have been pinky swear BFF's in the past - But there has been a choice made, and you are not part of it.

(I shared a 3bdrm apartment with a girl and a guy called "Dave the Communist"  Unmovable boundaries are sometimes less painful in the long run.)

Yeah, I but 'best friend' in airquotes because she's been anything but a good friend for the last about 6 months.
We gave them a deadline to get him on the lease by Wednesday. If she doesn't then we are going to be calling our landlord ourselves.

I would love to find my own place, but I'm in a college town with no decent, affordable openings. I've been looking for a good six months and can't find anything under a three bedroom. And if we move out , we'd be breaking the lease and have to pay the lease fee. If it gets bad enough though, I'm just gonna do it.

Setting boundaries is so difficult. We were living like a small family, sharing everything. Groceries, dishes, laundry etc. So i have had to split literally everything we own up. Its not been fun. We are attempting to keep super distinct boundaries, and hope it works. She refuses to communicate with us, so its been odd trying to get the boundaries across.

DougBPhoto wrote:
sounds like you're doing the right thing even if she does not understand it

good luck, but keep protecting yourselves

Thanks. I'm trying my hardest. We made a lot of mistakes when we agreed to live together, and now I'm paying for it.

Lela Jesse wrote:
Yeah, I but 'best friend' in airquotes because she's been anything but a good friend for the last about 6 months.
We gave them a deadline to get him on the lease by Wednesday. If she doesn't then we are going to be calling our landlord ourselves.

I would love to find my own place, but I'm in a college town with no decent, affordable openings. I've been looking for a good six months and can't find anything under a three bedroom. And if we move out , we'd be breaking the lease and have to pay the lease fee. If it gets bad enough though, I'm just gonna do it.

Setting boundaries is so difficult. We were living like a small family, sharing everything. Groceries, dishes, laundry etc. So i have had to split literally everything we own up. Its not been fun. We are attempting to keep super distinct boundaries, and hope it works. She refuses to communicate with us, so its been odd trying to get the boundaries across.

Sorry for your distress - truly I am.

And in a more humorous vein - there's always the "biker option"  (A landlord friend used 2 guys to move people out when they "overstayed" their welcome)  They were both crazy MoFo's that would make Hell's Angels nervously look for an "Exit" sign in a bar.  When a tenant was well past the move out date - He would rent the house to these guys - they would kick in the door  - - - and move in.....  Of course there was hysteria and cops called - but the bikers had a valid, fully legal lease and they told the cops that these fine folks could live there, -with them- if they wanted.....  Usually by the time one of them had taken a dump in a dresser - the squatters were packing.

So,  "Well  - - - my cousin just got out and needs a place to stay that is outside the restraining order's limits - He won't be any trouble"  (Depends on how good a poker face you have)

your cousin vv

Vintagevista wrote:
Sorry for your distress - truly I am.

And in a more humorous vein - there's always the "biker option"  (A landlord friend used 2 guys to move people out when they "overstayed" their welcome)  They were both crazy MoFo's that would make Hell's Angels nervously look for an "Exit" sign in a bar.  When a tenant was well past the move out date - He would rent the house to these guys - they would kick in the door  - - - and move in.....  Of course there was hysteria and cops called - but the bikers had a valid, fully legal lease and they told the cops that these fine folks could live there, -with them- if they wanted.....  Usually by the time one of them had taken a dump in a dresser - the squatters were packing.

So,  "Well  - - - my cousin just got out and needs a place to stay that is outside the restraining order's limits - He won't be any trouble"  (Depends on how good a poker face you have)

Hahahah! oh my gosh, I wish I could do that so badly! Hahah  It would be lovely. Thank you for that laugh, I needed it.

Sadly she know literally ever single member of my family. We've taken way to many trips to visit anyone I could possibly use. So it would be pretty hard to pull one over on her. But I could start lookin and see who I could find.

Our landlord is a pretty no- nonsense lady. They'll have a huge lawsuit hanging over their heads if they screw up again.

Edit
Oh my gosh... That person would be the best 'cousin' ever. At least to remove unwanted people

DougBPhoto wrote:
I hope I'll see you in front of my camera before I see you on Judge Judy


I don't know the law, but I would keep written track of when he moved in, when the conversations take place.

If you, your BF and the roommate are on the lease, I don't know if you should notify the landlord as if the landlord can appreciate that it is your roommate who is violating the lease (I presume) and not the two of you.

I shall try my hardest not to end up there. Hah

Thats a good idea. I really should write everything down.

I really hope my landlord could appreciate that we were not the ones violating the lease. You are right though. She may not be able to. She does seem to really like my BF and I though, so we'll see. They were smoking pot the other night, in the apartment, and that is also against the lease. I want to make sure I get my deposit back, you know? My bf and I have extremely careful to follow every single part of the rental agreement.

Danielle Reid wrote:
My fiance and I moved in with another guy and we split the bill 50/50. My fiance went to go play in the sand, and a few months later my brother started sleeping over on my bedroom floor. My roommate then decided since my brother had 3 shirts and a pair of jeans in my room that he was now a tenant and had to pay $150 to be there. $150 on top of he $400 I owe for rent. This guy doesn't own the apartment, he's a renter. But he talks about me owing him money for my brother sleeping in my room and eating only the food I buy and using less electricity than my fiance used for the short time he was here.

So I cursed him out, my fiance cursed him out, and I told him I'm leaving. He admitted he just wanted extra cash and overreacted when he found out my brother was here. I guess he thought me being alone meant free ass.

I haven't seen my roommate in nearly a month. I know he's still around because his bedroom light goes on and off. But I haven't spoken to him in weeks.

That sucks. How in the world does that even make sense to the guy. I don't get people. I see no way you would owe him any money.  But at least you were paying half, and he became more reasonable.  We were paying 600 of the total rent, she was paying 300. We have the exact same size bedrooms, except that my BF and I share the room and she had the room to herself. We all have equal access to the amenities. Utilities were split three ways, which is all good and fair. Then she decided to add another person, and it all when to shit. We were dumb for paying the 600 anyway. It should have been 450 per bedroom, which is what its going to have to be now.

At least you don't have to see him. My roommates have decided that their lives are going to happen on the couch in front of the TV. I see them, and they both give me the nastiest glare ever.

Toto Photo wrote:
You're going to need to communicate. Talk and listen--both equally. If that doesn't work, agree to see and abide by a mediator's decision.

That would be best. WE are gonna need a mediator, because she's highly passive aggressive, and just flat out doesn't care what we say, or our reasoning behind things.

The Original Sin  wrote:
The next time she starts smoking pot, leave the house- then call the cops, leave an anonymous tip and report that there are copious amounts of marijuana smoke coming from your apartment.

Leave it at that.

Seriously- never live with "friends."  Strangers are much easier.  I have roomates (my landlord allows me to sublet on the condition I carry extra rental insurance)- an awesome couple that just needed a room to rent for a few months while they're waiting on a house to be ready- and I laid the rules out before they even came over to see the place- you get the room and bathroom, use of laundry, kitchen, living room, etc- but if you're loud, nasty, don't clean up after yourself or a drunk/drug user, your ass is out with 24 hours notice and no refund of the rent.  They signed the agreement without hesitation- and I'm wishing they didn't have a house ready in March, now- I will never find roomies as awesome and harmonious to live with as these two ever again.

ETA:  I am serious about the drugs/cop combo.  I have zero tolerance for that crap in my home- because if they for some reason get busted while you're in the house, you can go to jail just as easily.

She should make sure her room has a lock on the door though and locked when they leave, the way some people's luck is, the shitty roommates would run and hide their stash in her room, so when the place was searched it would be found in her "possession" 

Lela Jesse wrote:
That would be best. WE are gonna need a mediator, because she's highly passive aggressive, and just flat out doesn't care what we say, or our reasoning behind things.

I found you a mediator.

The Original Sin  wrote:
The next time she starts smoking pot, leave the house- then call the cops, leave an anonymous tip and report that there are copious amounts of marijuana smoke coming from your apartment.

Leave it at that.

Seriously- never live with "friends."  Strangers are much easier.  I have roomates (my landlord allows me to sublet on the condition I carry extra rental insurance)- an awesome couple that just needed a room to rent for a few months while they're waiting on a house to be ready- and I laid the rules out before they even came over to see the place- you get the room and bathroom, use of laundry, kitchen, living room, etc- but if you're loud, nasty, don't clean up after yourself or a drunk/drug user, your ass is out with 24 hours notice and no refund of the rent.  They signed the agreement without hesitation- and I'm wishing they didn't have a house ready in March, now- I will never find roomies as awesome and harmonious to live with as these two ever again.

ETA:  I am serious about the drugs/cop combo.  I have zero tolerance for that crap in my home- because if they for some reason get busted while you're in the house, you can go to jail just as easily.

Yeah, That was my plan. The problem is the town I live in now. If you don't smoke pot, you are in the rare minority here. But I still plan on calling to police if it ever happens again. I'm not cool with it,

Oh boy, do I wish I had listened to all the people who told me that living with my friend may not be a good idea. They would have saved me a lot of trouble. But I didn't listen, and now I'm paying the consequences XP. That's what I get for being so stubborn.

I plan on never living with friends again, if I can at all help it. Its really not worth it. I'm hoping to avoid roommates all together if I can.

Your roommates sound lovely. I wish my landlord was more relaxed, but she is a very uptight and particular. I probably would be too, If i dealt with the masses of college students renting and not caring for their properties though.

Two Pears Studio wrote:
I once waited until the offensive roommate's parents arrived, ran into the kitchen and chugged most of a gallon jug of red wine... walked into the living room... Sat down and after striking up a conversation, proceeded to puke up red wine all over the parents...

She was fully moved out by midnight.

HAHAHAH

Now that sounds like a lovely plan. HAHA


I would love to try something like that. I know her mom very well too, so it might be even funnier. ha

P I X I E wrote:
I've only had significant others as roommates. It wasn't always sunshine and rainbows but it's mostly been good.

I don't think I'd ever be able to live with a stranger. Good thing that I don't have to worry about this right now.

I also live with my boyfriend, and thank god I do, or I would have been in a whole other mess.

Its not perfect, but its really good.

I don't want to live with a stranger either. It may have to happen in the future, but I'm going to try at all costs to avoid it. You never know what kind of crazy random people might be bringing around with them. I thought I knew already what I was getting myself into ( I've known this girl for almost 14 years, and her boyfriend for 3) but she is most definitely crazier than I assumed.

Caradoc wrote:

I found you a mediator.

Great!!!! I take him! He seems like exactly the person I need! XP