Kevin Connery wrote:

KelliOnLineGlamourNude  wrote:

udor wrote:
See, the weird thing is... if I am in such a situation... all the way deep in, I do not want to talk to anybody about it...

One of my best friends, considerably older, he tells me to talk to him, or to call him anytime, and he means it... but, as I said... when I am deep... hitting that wall... I don't need or want to communicate what is going on.

"Talking" might be very advisable for people who feel desperate... and when in that state, a different perspective might and can help them... if they see no way out... a friend or counselor might be able to set perspective straight... this doesn't work if you are just tired of struggling, tired of life... you feel enough is enough.

You don't want to talk with someone who gets it and gets u?

You don't want to talk to anyone: it 'costs' too much, and the expectation of benefit is usually zero, if not negative.

One reason there aren't as many suicides as there might be is that it takes some effort, and some of the most depressed people don't even have the energy to get out of bed. (It's also why some anti-depressants can be risky, as they improve energy before improving mood.)

Bingo...

The most dangerous time with a severely depressed patient, is when they start to feel a little better.

Herman Surkis wrote:
Bingo...

The most dangerous time with a severely depressed patient, is when they start to feel a little better.

Then what reasonable thing can one do to 'help' a depressed person?

Herman Surkis wrote:
Reality is simple: from the moment you are born, you are destined to die. That is a given, so no surprise. What happens been A and B is the real question.

I agree with this 100%

Herman Surkis wrote:
Bingo...

The most dangerous time with a severely depressed patient, is when they start to feel a little better.

Jules NYC wrote:
Then what reasonable thing can one do to 'help' a depressed person?

Just be genuine. Listen and observe as best as you know how to. It's all you can do. Be there in whatever capacity you can. Sometimes just sitting in the room with someone and not talking is a huge support. They are comforted by you being there, but dont have the words to say. It's the simple fact that you care enough to stay and be with them. Maybe another time someone just needs a hug. It can vary from person to person and from time to time. Feel the person out and check in with them.

Lumen Sky wrote:

Herman Surkis wrote:
Bingo...

The most dangerous time with a severely depressed patient, is when they start to feel a little better.

Just be genuine. Listen and observe as best as you know how to. It's all you can do. Be there in whatever capacity you can. Sometimes just sitting in the room with someone and not talking is a huge support. They are comforted by you being there, but dont have the words to say. It's the simple fact that you care enough to stay and be with them. Maybe another time someone just needs a hug. It can vary from person to person and from time to time. Feel the person out and check in with them.

Thank you.

Jules NYC wrote:
Then what reasonable thing can one do to 'help' a depressed person?

Clinically, the slightly suicidal person was elevated to "suicide risk" as they got a little better. Now in a hospital, this is easy to track, at home not so much.

What happens too often at home is that the incredibly depressed person attracts a lot of attention and help. As soon as they get a *little* better they tell everyone that they are fine, and since they seem ok, they are left alone...support system withdraws. Unfortunately this is when they need them the most, as they now have the energy to do what they have been contemplating.

So what to do, is to not withdraw the support system when they are doing a little better. And mostly do *not* let them push you away. Keep them engaged in you and life.
During the primary depression phase, which may or may not lead to suicide, they will withdraw from people and the world. Withdrawing is how many depressives will deal with the world. After they have spent some time licking their wounds and re energizing, they will slowly become active and engaged. This is a complex dance.

It is work.
Are they worth it?

And know that if the person is determined to end their lives, then
a- there is nothing you can do to stop them, short of keeping them locked up for the rest of their lives.
b- choosing to not continue on, is a personal right.
c- you do want to prevent the acting out of the desire to be an impulsive act. Let's face it, we do as peeps do some stupid shit on impulse.

Also know that the typical test question of have 'you ever thought of suicide' is pretty bogus, as research shows that as many as 70% of the population have contemplated suicide at some point in their lives.

"Are you thinking of suicide at the moment" is a more valid question. But also know that the person who says "yes", is at risk, but by acknowledging the risk is also asking for help. The highly at risk is the person who answers "no", as they are likely to attempt, and often be successful. They say "no" because they do not want you interfering with their plans. At this point it requires a professionals judgment call, and we often get it wrong. (which is why they tend to err on the side of caution and will hospitalize someone who does not need it).

T Brown wrote:
I think almost everyone has that thought cross their mind in one form or another and to what degree it takes a hold of the thoughts is hard to discern, but I could see how easily it could go from a random thought, to something of consideration, to a solution for that person.

Is anyone of us astute enough to see or even recognize those thoughts? Let alone offer any help? I know there are signs but signs don't always indicate a tendency or an intent. Do we automatically assume any and everyone who is suffering from clinical depression or mental fatigue as being suicidal?

How does one intervene and at what point?

I have my thoughts but I am asking for yours.

Hi T. Here are some links to give you an idea of when to take a suicidal utterance seriously. Always of course is the perfect answer but we don't live in a perfect world. pp

http://www.webmd.com/depression/getting … -depressed

http://studentsagainstdepression.org/ge … t-someone/

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/living_ … person.htm


Often the depressed person will become up beat and happier. This often because they have decided they are ready to die.

Tim Little Photography wrote:
Hi T. Here are some links to give you an idea of when to take a suicidal utterance seriously. Always of course is the perfect answer but we don't live in a perfect world. pp

http://www.webmd.com/depression/getting … -depressed

http://studentsagainstdepression.org/ge … t-someone/

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/living_ … person.htm


Often the depressed person will become up beat and happier. This often because they have decided they are ready to die.

cite? ridiculous.

Lumen Sky wrote:

cite? ridiculous.

"Many people suffering from depression and even contemplating suicide hide their feelings and appear to be happy just prior to their suicide attempt."
http://www.save.org/index.cfm?fuseactio … 1b1b404c94

"Watch for sudden "rebounds". If the person in question experiences a change like one of those listed above and then suddenly go back to acting like their old self, this is not a sign that they have suddenly fixed all of their problems and are back to normal. A drastic change back to a seemingly happy state may signal that somebody has "made up their mind" about committing suicide and is now at peace with the idea. An unexpected swing towards happiness should not alone be seen as a sign that times of trouble are over.

http://www.wikihow.com/Recognize-the-Wa … of-Suicide

Finally, there is my own experience prior to my suicide attempt.