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Interpretation of women's personal ads
YES>>>this is stereotyping, and yes, many of you have probably seen it before, but I got it in my e-mail, so now you can choose to read it or not. DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS: 40-ish................................49. Adventurous.......................Slept with everyone. Athletic...............................No breasts. Average looking...................Moooo. Beautiful..............................Pathological liar. Emotionally Secure..............On medication. Feminist...............................Fat. Free spirit............................Junkie. Friendship first....................Former slut. New-Age.............Body hair in the wrong places. Old-fashioned......................No BJs. Open-minded.......................Desperate. Outgoing.............................Loud and Embarrassing. Professional.........................Bitch. Voluptuous..........................Very Fat. Large frame.........................Hugely Fat. Wants Soul mate.................Stalker. Dec 08 05 03:37 pm Link Actually had me laughing out loud. Now we just need a mens list.  Dec 08 05 03:39 pm Link Words Women Use FINE This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. FIVE MINUTES If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. NOTHING This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine" GO AHEAD This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it. LOUD SIGH This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing" THAT'S OKAY This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake. THANKS A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say "you're welcome." WHATEVER It's a woman's way of saying *!#@ YOU! Dec 08 05 03:41 pm Link Crazier Benny wrote: This one is sooooooo true. I said "whatever" to my bf the other day and he said, "you take that whatever back, I didn't do anything to deserve it and you know it." Dec 08 05 03:44 pm Link Lapis wrote: LOL Dec 08 05 03:47 pm Link Crazier Benny wrote: Pay attention to this one! Dec 08 05 03:47 pm Link Lapis wrote: ROTFLMAO Dec 08 05 03:48 pm Link "Likes candlelight dinners and long walks on the beach"...the candlelight covers up the amount of food she's stuffing in her mouth & the long walk on the beach...to burn off the calories she just gavoned  Dec 08 05 03:49 pm Link WOMEN'S ADS 40-ish..........................49 Adventurer......................Slept with all your friends Athletic........................No tits Average looking.................Has a face like a basset hound Beautiful.......................Pathological liar Contagious Smile................Does a lot of Ecstasy Educated........................Banged her Political Science professor Emotionally Secure..............Medicated Feminist........................Fat ballbuster Free spirit.....................Junkie Friendship first................Trying to live down reputation as a slut Fun.............................Annoying Gentle......................... Comatose Good Listener...................Borderline Autistic New-Age.........................All body hair, all the time Old-fashioned...................Lights out,missionary position only, no BJs Open-minded.....................Desperate Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing Passionate......................Sloppy drunk Poet............................Depressive Schizophrenic Professional....................Certified Bitch Redhead.........................Bad dye-job Reubenesque.....................Grossly Fat Romantic........................Looks better by candle light Social..........................Has been passed around like an hors d'oeuvres tray Voluptuous......................Very Fat Weight proportion w/ height.....Hugely Fat -as tall as you are wide Wants Soulmate..................Stalker Widow...........................Drove first husband to shoot himself Young at heart..................Old bat MEN'S ADS 40-ish..........................52 and looking for 25-yr-old Athletic........................Watches a lot of NASCAR Average looking.................Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back Educated........................Will patronize the shit out of you Free Spirit.....................Banging your sister Friendship first................As long as friendship involves nookie Fun.............................Good with a remote and a six pack Good looking....................Arrogant Very good looking...............Dumb as a board Honest..........................Pathological Liar Huggable........................Overweight, more body hair than a bear Likes to cuddle.................Insecure mama's boy Mature..........................Older than your father Open-minded.....................Wants to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested Physically fit..................Does a lot of 12-ounce curls Poet............................Wrote ex-girlfriend's # on a bathroom stall Sensitive.......................Cries at chick flicks Very sensitive..................Gay Spiritual.......................Got laid in a cemetery once Stable..........................Arrested for stalking, but not convicted Thoughtful......................Says "Excuse me" when he farts Dec 08 05 03:50 pm Link likes to travel...she means Paris...I'm thinking 'let's drive to the beach'! financially secure...she means 6 figure income...I'm thinking 'kewl, phones still on'! Dec 08 05 03:56 pm Link Thank you Cory, for providing us with both points of view. Looks like my internet friend clipped more words out of the original text then your internet friend. Dec 08 05 03:56 pm Link Man This is funny. The writter of this list is a genius. Dec 08 05 04:01 pm Link Lapis wrote: I just figured there had to be a man's side and Google was my friend. Dec 08 05 04:15 pm Link What is going on in hre? These lists are grossly insane...i.e. "Funny but, I'm too much of a prude to laugh." Dec 08 05 05:13 pm Link LOL good stuff! Lapis, if you have any personal ads anywhere, take them down and just call me Dec 08 05 06:53 pm Link Wait.. I dated a guy who used these. He had all the stereotypical disadvantages of BOTH genders. How could I let that one slip away? Crazier Benny wrote: Dec 09 05 01:01 am Link "Wait.. I dated a guy who used these. He had all the stereotypical disadvantages of BOTH genders. How could I let that one slip away?" Theda...you are to be fought over and won over...you could bring back the American Gladiator and have men fight for the privilage of taking you out to dinner. Dec 12 05 08:46 am Link Crazier Benny wrote: hehe.....this brought a huge smile to my face......damn, if only most men could figure these things out......... Dec 12 05 01:48 pm Link If there was one thing my father taught me that I'm going to remember for my entire life it was two simple words.... "Yes Dear" Dec 12 05 06:43 pm Link Brandon Smith wrote: sucker.....lol Dec 12 05 06:48 pm Link The Don Mon wrote: yeah, but he is probably getting laid a lot, since men who are getting regular sex are much calmer than their single brothers...so he'll agree with anything to keep that coming...lol. Dec 12 05 06:55 pm Link I think "I'm sorry" and "you're right" should also be said on a daily basis. Not to mention "I love you". Dec 12 05 07:00 pm Link not all true CM Photography wrote: Dec 12 05 07:59 pm Link did anyone ever go out with someone from a personal ad? and if so, where they like their profile? Dec 12 05 08:45 pm Link Lapis wrote: I neither verify nor disclaim that at all..... Dec 12 05 09:26 pm Link |
