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Facebook: Why don't people reply to messages?
I'm trying to find out if this is something I should take personally or if it's a Facebook issue. There are several people - some friends, some people I'm not FB friends with -- that I send messages to, but never get responses. Currently, there are about 10 people like this that just flat out don't respond at all. I want to know why. Is it because they have their Facebook notifications turned off and when they log in, they don't realize they have a message and don't check? For non-Facebook friends, I obviously can't write on their wall or anything, and I don't want to be so pompous as to send a friend request until I've at least reached out and made contact first. For many of these people, I can tell they've logged in since I sent my message. So are they purposely ignoring me for whatever reason, or is it plausible they have their notifications turned off and haven't even seen my message? Most of the people ignoring me, I don't care about. But there are a few people that it concerns/bothers me that they haven't responded and I hope it's not because they're pissed at me for some reason. Mar 10 10 09:20 pm Link FACEBOOK A.D.D. I have it. I read a message, go to respond and then see the add saying "Meet singles in your area" and then its like a SHINEY OBJECT and I lose focus  Mar 10 10 09:28 pm Link I can see that for some people, but there's 1 or 2 people, at least, that I would think would immediately reply to my if they saw a message from me. At least I'd like to think so. Mar 10 10 09:38 pm Link it does it to me too, dont worry i think its a fb glitch. Mar 10 10 09:40 pm Link It's hard to distinguish what's a message and what's spam. I have almost 7k messages in my fb inbox. Sometimes I just go in there, look, and exit if nothing looks promising. Sometimes I don't go in there for days because I don't feel like being bothered with pages, and pages of spam. Mar 10 10 09:41 pm Link Um, I don't respond to PM from people who aren't my friends. Why? Because when you reply to someone who cannot access your profile, well just responding to a PM lets them see it. And well, no thanks. Mar 10 10 09:44 pm Link Sleepy Weasel wrote: Facebook is not a "profesional" networking site as MM touts itself to be. Its more personalized thus I would not at all feel obligated or feel guilty not responding or friending someone who I did not know prior to. Mar 10 10 09:47 pm Link Sleepy Weasel wrote: 'course, you can take it how you'd like, including allowing it to get to you personally ... Mar 10 10 09:51 pm Link Ive had messages sitting in my inbox for over a week that I didnt even realize existed. they keep redoing the layout, and I dont log on enough to keep up with it. I had no idea where my inbox was let alone what was in it Mar 10 10 09:51 pm Link Dominique Jackson wrote: Facebook is a hot mess. I don't know why it's popular. Mar 10 10 09:54 pm Link Too many groups, events, and fan pages send me FB messages. It starts getting really annoying after a while, so I sometimes don't even bother to click through my inbox. Mar 10 10 10:01 pm Link Facebook isn't MySpace, so no, I don't accept just anyone sending me a friend request. I already find I have too many friends on there and I've cut down on more than half. Mar 10 10 10:07 pm Link I've had my personal Facebook page for almost 5 years (since Facebook began). Some of my Facebook "friends" are family members and people I've known since grade school. It's the one place where I don't have to be "on" all the time. I never book work on Facebook. I block messages and never accept friend requests from people I don't know. Maybe the people you're contacting just like their privacy or personal space. If you're interested in booking someone, perhaps you should try contacting them via MM, email, or even *gasp* MySpace. EDIT: If you're just sending friendly messages, then maybe they really are just unaware of them or they may just be procrastinating, as I often do (or they really could be ignoring you -- you know your friends better than I do). Mar 10 10 10:07 pm Link Lisa Levin wrote: +1 Mar 10 10 10:10 pm Link I asked a girl why she didn't return my message just today, and she told me she has about 1,200 unread messages. Pretty girls get a lot of messages. I get one a day, maybe. Mar 10 10 10:14 pm Link Nicotine wrote: + infinity! Mar 10 10 10:19 pm Link Just to clarify some responses in here - the people I'm contacting are PERSONAL FRIENDS - not models/photographers, or business associates. My main concern is the people I am not Facebook friends with (i.e., I know them personally, haven't talked to them in years, but I cannot write on their wall or contact them any other way). So if I've sent a message and they haven't responded, I'm trying to determine if they're blowing me off and I should leave them alone, or if they aren't even checking the message and it would not be considered bothersome to try another way to contact them (send friend request, or something of the like). Mar 10 10 10:33 pm Link Nicotine wrote: These are people I haven't talked to in years, so i don't know them well enough to know which case it may be. I'm not good at taking hints from people and have a history of misinterpreting things like this, so I'm just asking others if it's "common" for people to not reply to FB messages, even if they are from friends you're in good standing with. Mar 10 10 10:36 pm Link Sleepy Weasel wrote: Send a friend request with a personal message attached - that shows up in the friend requests list (not the inbox) but they will still see your message. They may get many less friend requests than spam email messages each day. Mar 11 10 02:27 am Link Its a struggle. Mar 11 10 02:30 am Link Sleepy Weasel wrote: Call them ask ask why. Mar 11 10 02:59 am Link Paul Bryson Photography wrote: ? Mar 11 10 08:24 am Link PixieMini wrote: +1 Mar 11 10 08:32 am Link fwiw...i don't ever respond... Mar 11 10 08:34 am Link I often get sent messages on facebook and don't reply, probably about 8/10 of messages I receive go unresponded to... I'll open them or read them on my blackberry and decide to reply later, them completely forget about them. My counter is at 28 at the moment. Maybe I'm just a bad person.  Or I don't care about the people!  Mar 11 10 08:35 am Link I'm pretty bad at responding to messages. Usually it's because my inbox gets spammed with messages from groups and a crap ton of messages from random events I got invited to. I nearly always get 10+ messages a day and they are usually from events I'm invited to but haven't responded to. Thus it's easy to miss a message from someone I actually know. Currently I have 584 unread messages and it's because I'm not going to bother reading or deleting the spam messages. Usually I just ignore FB messages. FB is filled with spammers, random people, annoying messages and application request. I ignore it and it just builds up to much it's pointless to even try and respond. Lets see at the moment: 196 Friend Requests from people I don't know 584 messages from groups, events I don't want to go to, or people I don't know 38 random event invites from events I won't go to 212 group invites from groups I don't want to join 163 application requests Yeah don't get offended if people don't respond to you I'm sure most peoples accounts are like this unless they are on FB all the time there is no way to keep up! Mar 11 10 08:35 am Link I don't answer Facebook messages from people I used to go to high school with, even though they insist on messaging me compulsively. I can't figure out why a decade later makes all the difference, and suddenly they want to be friends with me. Sometimes, I don't answer Facebook messages from people I actually like, because I only log in every few days, and spend less than an hour per week on there. There's a mix of people on my Facebook friends list, people who know about my current life now, and people who used to know me years ago. Since I try to keep my work and current lifestyle (sort of) private, I have to be careful what I say and do on Facebook, since there's a lot of cross-over that could occur. Mar 11 10 08:39 am Link Laura UnBound wrote: This.^ I've had this happen with a couple of people that I DO know and they never respond. I had to post on their profile that I sent them a message. But this doesn't apply to all, my nephew had people that he just got rid of on his profile because he felt that it was just a waste of space aka no conversation period. Suddenly out of the blue they want to know why he took them off of their friend list. Mar 11 10 08:46 am Link OK, some of these replies make me feel a little better. I'm trying the friend request for a few of the people I would actually want to friend on FB. The others, I guess, will just be ignored since they won't reply. Mar 11 10 09:49 am Link I have a perfect example of a "non-reply" When I was in HS, I lived in a neighborhood..... it was my house, then Ron's house, then Debbie's house, all in that order.....my parents divorced in 1995, we all went our separate ways, and havent been to that neighborhood since, except for a few drive by's when I wanted to see my old house.... Well, Debbie is on my FB friend's list...and one day I was thinking about Ron, and I sent her a message on FB, I wrote : "Hey Debbie, blah blah blah...."is Ron still around, have you kept intouch with him"? This was a few months ago....i havent got an answer yet!! Mar 11 10 12:20 pm Link One of my friends requests was returned! Now I have another friend to completely ignore me. Mar 11 10 04:09 pm Link Facebook: Why don't people reply to messages? Those must be some of the same people from here...... Mar 11 10 04:16 pm Link |
