Damianne wrote:

Tell him you're excited when he agrees, people love to be told they're liked.
Once he's already agreed to the activity, it's not really clingy to be excited to do said activity with him. It's not like "I'm really excited to one day marry you and here's my scrapbook of our outfits for that day"

lol. No, no scrapbook and if I did something like that, I would NEVER admit it to anyone, not even to myself!

Damianne wrote:

Tell him you're excited when he agrees, people love to be told they're liked.
Once he's already agreed to the activity, it's not really clingy to be excited to do said activity with him. It's not like "I'm really excited to one day marry you and here's my scrapbook of our outfits for that day"

lol. No, no scrapbook and if I did something like that, I would NEVER admit it to anyone, not even to myself!

scrymettet wrote:
fuck the etiquette.
go for it and report.
if you disappear for a week,we will assume you are getting the sweaty sex you deserve.

If I disappear for a week, it will be because I was so stressed out from work that I had to check myself into a psychiatric ward.

scrymettet wrote:
fuck the etiquette.
go for it and report.
if you disappear for a week,we will assume you are getting the sweaty sex you deserve.

great advice. Do what feels right. You dont want to regret not doing something.

Koryn Locke wrote:

If I disappear for a week, it will be because I was so stressed out from work that I had to check myself into a psychiatric ward.

Dear 'Mr Wonderful', I spent some great time hanging out with you, I would love to do it again. Soon.

scrymettet wrote:

Dear 'Mr Wonderful', I spent some great time hanging out with you, I would love to do it again. Soon.

And often.

And maybe horizontally.

Lawrence Guy wrote:
And often.

And maybe horizontally.

right, but not everything has to be about sex, or boobs, or sexual, always. Breathe.

Gabrielle Heather wrote:

right, but not everything has to be about sex, or boobs, or sexual, always. Breathe.

Gabrielle Heather wrote:

right, but not everything has to be about sex, or boobs, or sexual, always. Breathe.

Not everything I write is about sex, or boobs, or sexual, always. Breathe.

Koryn Locke wrote:
I sent it last night. No response so far. Every time someone texts me, I'm flying to the phone. Lol. Starting to maybe give up.

But, even if he never responds, well I shot some pin-up today. I 've never really shot "good" pin-up before, ever, so I'm happy. I'm going to go lift weights and eat a giant burrito. Whatever.

on being happy
lift weights for me

scrymettet wrote:


on being happy
lift weights for me

eat and get healthy for me too

Koryn Locke wrote:
I sent it last night. No response so far. Every time someone texts me, I'm flying to the phone. Lol. Starting to maybe give up.

Koryn Locke wrote:
I sent it last night. No response so far. Every time someone texts me, I'm flying to the phone. Lol. Starting to maybe give up.

But, even if he never responds, well I shot some pin-up today. I 've never really shot "good" pin-up before, ever, so I'm happy. I'm going to go lift weights and eat a giant burrito. Whatever.

Oh lady, I know the feeling.  I always try to temper my expectations, because I hate getting really excited for something that never happens, and it's totally not fair for the other people to try to live up to what I've created in my mind.  That being said, it's really hard to not expect a text, or think that you're going to look at your phone and see their name and then you don't.

Give it time.  He may just be busy, or maybe he's not very good at checking his phone , or maybe he's just not that into text messaging and prefers other ways of communicating.

Focus on you, which you're already doing.  If he texts back, awesome.  If not, you're still awesome.

Also, I can't wait to see the results of the shoot!

UnoMundo wrote:
"...he asked if I wanted to go sailing this summer,"

Can you swim?
Do you throw up at the slightest boat movement?

I once had a date turn green on a boat ride, and ended up spewing food chucks all over my khakis.

If he wants to see you after an upchuck, you have a keeper
.
Stop the formalities. He may be doing the same thing, and you guys are wasting time.

I can't swim but I look great in a life jacket and no, I don't get motion sickness. I've been boating, tubing & kayaking. None of them made me remotely ill.

I asked last night. No response. I'm going to stop fantasizing about having him in my bed now, because no answer is generally THE answer

Koryn Locke wrote:

I can't swim but I look great in a life jacket and no, I don't get motion sickness. I've been boating, tubing & kayaking. None of them made me remotely ill.

I asked last night. No response. I'm going to stop fantasizing about having him in my bed now, because no answer is generally THE answer

not over just one evening.

Calm thyself. Love thyself.

Laura Ann - Fashion wrote:

Also, I can't wait to see the results of the shoot!

me either. I shot figure work for so long, I think I sort of forgot I have a face, and that it photographs really well, and is pretty.

Damianne wrote:

not over just one evening.

Calm thyself. Love thyself.

I guess I'm not used to people not being into using their phones. I try to return messages and calls within a couple hours. It's a priority to me to be prompt in communications. I know different people are different.

Koryn Locke wrote:
…because no answer is generally THE answer

You only asked him a day ago.

Kincaid Blackwood wrote:

You only asked him a day ago.

This is the Age of Twitter. It's not like you have to deliver a love letter on horseback anymore.

Koryn Locke wrote:
This is the Age of Twitter. It's not like you have to deliver a love letter on horseback anymore.

That's a precariously problematic angle to take.

Consider the implications and ramifications. The expectation is that a quick response is not only deserved but a response that is not quick is somehow a sign of something. It assumes the other person is not engaged in otherwise consuming activities. It assumes that the other person is making you wait purposely and, therefore, playing games. It assumes that the other person has seen the invitation and is ignoring it or intentionally delaying his/her response. It assumes that there are not a host of reasons why a person might not get back to you within 24 hours.

There are many reasons. You asked yesterday. He might not have seen it. He might have seen it and is checking on some things first and has chosen not to respond until he has a definitive answer. You know, some people take "Thanks for the invitation; let me look at my schedule." to be a politely stated "Go fuck yourself." And before you argue that, consider that you've taken the radio silence (the origin of which is only speculation) and effectively embraced it as the same statement.

Come on. Give the guy at least 48 hours before you go breaking up with him. I mean, maybe it's a fuck you but how can you know that after a day? The only thing to assume is that he just hasn't gotten around to it yet. Which isn't getting your hopes up: assuming that he will automatically say "Yes." would be getting your hopes up. Acknowledging that he just hasn't responded is nothing more than accepting the obvious at face value and moving on. You're doing right by going about your business but reading something into his non-response is reaching.

Kincaid Blackwood wrote:
...  The only thing to assume is that he just hasn't gotten around to it yet. Which isn't getting your hopes up: assuming that he will automatically say "Yes." would be getting your hopes up. Acknowledging that he just hasn't responded is nothing more than accepting the obvious at face value and moving on. You're doing right by going about your business but reading something into his non-response is reaching.

Reading your post, I went downstairs to heat some corn in the microwave, and I got to thinking ; my life is very driven by the perception of time online == FAST. I network, socialize, do everything online, so I'm used to this sort of frenetic, bizarre sense of timing in communication exchanges.

He's basically a career academic, working in a lab, and obviously pretty obsessed with that lifestyle. His sense of time, and communication is likely to  be different than my own. I remember when I was younger, and involved in a more academic life, time felt slower to me then too. I had a cell phone, but I never used it. I think academics do have a different pace of life.

Koryn Locke wrote:
This is the Age of Twitter. It's not like you have to deliver a love letter on horseback anymore.

And if you do, women get all creeped out by it.

Zebadiah _MI wrote:

And if you do, women get all creeped out by it.

I would just think it was funny.

Koryn Locke wrote:

I would just think it was funny.

that would denote dedication,for sure

Koryn Locke wrote:

I guess I'm not used to people not being into using their phones. I try to return messages and calls within a couple hours. It's a priority to me to be prompt in communications. I know different people are different.

He could also just be checking his schedule

Koryn Locke wrote:
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Is that a yes

Koryn Locke wrote:
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I'm leaving the over abundance of jumps

Damianne wrote:

Is that a yes

I think it is

Damianne wrote:

Is that a yes

Yes, my friend, that was a yes.

Koryn Locke wrote:
[img]http:/gif[/img]

*high five*

scrymettet wrote:

*high five*

High fives for all!

Koryn Locke wrote:
I would just think it was funny.

You say that now....

but if you meant it, it's another one of those cruel tricks life likes to play on me


And congrats on the date!

Koryn Locke wrote:
When is it appropriate to "suggest" you see someone again, if you already socialized with them once, had a lot of fun and THEY suggested a variety of activities to do together for the future during that outing, but never directly followed up with you immediately afterward?

Specifically: I met someone for lunch and coffee last Sunday afternoon. We ended up spending something like 5 hours together. It was sort of like some holy power had extracted the essence of all the sex fantasies of my youth, poured them into a bottle, then alchemied that bottle of fantasies into a human form, gave it a degree from MIT, and handed it to me last Sunday.

During the time we were together, he asked if I wanted to go sailing this summer, and proposed a couple of other things we could do together at some point in the future. They were all fucking awesome. I was pretty much thinking over and over in my head, for five hours, "omgomgomg i-can't-believe-this-is-real-and-this-person-exists-anywhere-outside-of-my-imagination." Then, he sort of disappeared all week, so I sent him a link to an article about some mind-blowing black hole shit, with a crazy star orbiting around it -- even though I'm pretty sure he's already read every bad-ass science article of epic awesomeness I could ever send. He responded the next morning, and sent me his gmail chat name thing, said I "should have it," and approved my facebook friend request. Never mentioned meeting up for a second time, so I've had a sad since yesterday.

I realized that, maybe, the reason this person does not have a girlfriend, or five, or ten, is because he is not very ... aggressive in pursuit. He came across as pretty quiet and mild-mannered, and so I guess that turns it over onto me now - which I fucking hate, because I don't really like to take charge of anything.

It will be one week tomorrow; would it be too soon to send a message asking something, really goofy, along the lines of, "So, when are we going to go to the Museum of Bad Art that you mentioned? I can't wait to have my eyes opened, my aesthetic senses honed, my very soul left breathless by a significant dose of the most unfortunate creative renderings humankind has to offer." I figured he would laugh at that, and it wouldn't sound too serious.

There is always the possibility of this being a case of, 'They're just not that into you,' and I really misinterpreted everything.

This is why I love you. There is an innocence and wisdom going on in you. You are a bundle of duality. "Patience is a virtue" is a saying for a reason. I want to squeeze you and hold you and tell you it will all be okay. I want to find this man and tell him to find you and satisfy your heart... for now. As my guess is that you would out grow him pretty soon.

His non response is not about you. It is about him... it could be he is busy... his email was hacked... he lost his keys... he is scared of commitment,.. what ever... but it is not about you. The moment you get that it will all work out in the end... you will be able to see it is not over... because it hasn't worked out yet.