Super Dimension Foto wrote:
I think it is a bad idea to date someone whom you have a position of authority over.    As photographers we're asking models to trust that we'll be professional and respectful around them during a shoot.   I think you risk hurting your reputation dating models that you work with.  At least that's my opinion.  Now if they have a friend and want to play match maker I'm not going to complain.

While I think there can be an element of truth to this I think this often stated argument is also often flawed or over stated in many respects.  I think the idea that because one person acts in a managerial capacity over another means they have tremendous power and leverage is an overly simplistic argument the often does not hold true. 

1.  Contracting someone for a one-time event does not involve the same long-term power that employing someone does.  At the end of a shoot and after a model has been paid, their transaction is concluded.  There isn't nearly the potential leverage there is with long term employment. 

2.  Having some administrative power over someone doesn't mean you have power over them, in fact it can be the other way around.    My boss for example manages our department, but he can't just fire me, deny me a raise or just change my contractual duties, so he has very little leverage or power over me.  Someone I supervise could make a false accusation against me and very likely get me fired for it.  The threat of that gives them power, even though I supervise them.

3.  Even where a notable power structure exists, it doesn't mean any relationship or proposed relationship is using that power to force one person into doing something they don't want to do.  I think when one is in a position of power, they need to be careful not to misuse that power, but I disagree that means having a relationship is an abuse of power.

Images by MR wrote:

Yes.

+1 (Provided both parties are consenting adults).

Eyesso wrote:
I think with fashion photography it's not quite the same, the footing is more equal, mutually beneficial, so I don't think the lines need to be as strict.

Great post (and amazing port btw.) But for fashion professionals at least, a lot of photographers would go even further:

https://www.modelmayhem.com/education/p … ssionalism

TomFRohwer wrote:
50% of all problems would end in smoke if people would stop caring for what other people think how they should live.

+1

99.9%

jakemillerphoto wrote:
Hopefully this is an appropriate place to open up this sort of discussion. I'm a single photographer getting into fashion and more than a few models have indicated an interest in dating me. I know art making is about blurring boundaries but the double role of girlfriend and contractor / employee concerns me. Has anyone else grappled with this? Please let's keep this to an adult rational discussion about the professional implications hopefully I'm not alone on this issue. - Thanks!

(I did not read many of the other comments, so these are just my thoughts in response to the OP)

Obviously models and photographers date all the time. I don't think there is an issue in that. I think where the issues come up are when:
1) The dating is somehow part of the working relationship (as in I'll date you if you shoot with me or vice versa).
2) There are jealous issues ("You can't shoot with anyone else while we're dating" or "Why did you shoot that concept with her and not me?"
3) The relationship doesn't work out and one or both people decide to make that personal issue a professional issue as well by spreading rumors, telling people they can't shoot with their ex, etc.

I think there is also the issue of how you approach the situation. In my opinion, this should be done outside of a shoot. As in, once the shoot is done, you might ask the other person if they are interested. Otherwise I think you risk looking like you shot with them just so you could ask them out or, if they say no, you might be tempted to end the shoot or not give photos.

And I am one of those models who has a success story with it. I met a photographer online, he was the first person whose work I really enjoyed and wanted to be a part of, but we were states apart and both seeing other people. I don't think at that point that either of us was thinking about dating the other anyway. We sort of exchanged comments and such online, became FB friends, and that was about it for a couple years. I went through a nasty breakup (caused by a female photographer and my ex who then became a photographer), and we started talking more eventually becoming long distance friends. And then one day it just sort of clicked. I started flying out to visit him and we eventually got married. So it is possible, but I've seen a lot of not so successful stories too, particularly with more casual types of relationships.

(Also, please keep in mind that MM is not a dating site, so any dating you would want to do would need to be pursued elsewhere. Just stating that preemptively, not accusing)

Eyesso wrote:
The laws of what is ethical are not the same as what is legal.  Legally, anybody can date anybody.....except, actually, psychiatrists/psychologists, since...well, you can imagine the opportunism that might occur in that setting. 

I guess  if the model asked you out?  I mean....I it's up to you.  Just be careful you aren't just a character in his or her shallow fantasy.  You deserve as much respect as they do.

I enjoyed your entire post yet your words are quite true.  I also wanted to add that some people don't even care if one is married/in a committed relationship so it's not so simple for either party, single or in a relationship.  Sharks are everywhere people;)

Dating a photographer while you are only working a short amount of time (even for a long shoot) is wildly different from seeing someone every day in a 9-5 situation, being in meetings where you can't relax and be yourself as much within a corporate situation.  Plus in ideal circumstances, the photographer is being creative, the model is being creative and looking fabulous... all nice ingredients for all of that.

It's not cool being hit on when you are not interested and just 'working', yet with dignity, class and tact, it is easy to say, "No thank you".

As for jealousy and such - well, it's silly if a photographer truly enjoys shooting (insert whatever here).  I always admired portrait photographers that don't find the most wrinkled old person to shoot to prove their artistic merit in a black and white shot.

I think the crux of jealousy in these scenarios stem from women wanting their partner to see themselves as the 'most beautiful' and other beautiful women are competition for that feeling if the photographer doesn't make her feel #1.  It's really a self-esteem issue & a relationship issue. With all of that, it's easier falling in love with landscape photographer if that element is a problem... or be with someone who is 'into' other things than pretty faces.

Alex C wrote:
No! Absolutely not! Photographers and Models should never date! EVER! Before you know it, you fall in love and get married. Yes! Married!!! I was still coming to grips with that and then BAM! You make *babies*! I mean it's just insane! Love? Marriage? Babies? Who needs this crap! Sure I love my wife and our beautiful baby boy. But I didn't become a photographer to change diapers. I became a photographer to be adored and admired from all corners of the world! Women begging to take their clothes off in front of my lens. Clients flying me all over the world to shoot their campaigns. DIAPERS I TELL YOU!

Photographers, don't date models because you will have to change pooped diapers. It happened to me! Don't let it happen to you!

'This has been a public service announcement"

Thank you for this, we will take it into consideration!

Eyesso wrote:
I guess  if the model asked you out?  I mean....I it's up to you.  Just be careful you aren't just a character in his or her shallow fantasy.  You deserve as much respect as they do.

At this stage in my life, at this very moment... I'd settle for being just a character in her shallow fantasy!   

                                                    

udor wrote:

At this stage in my life, at this very moment... I'd settle for being just a character in her shallow fantasy!   

                                                    

I just prefer being shallow!

udor wrote:

At this stage in my life, at this very moment... I'd settle for being just a character in her shallow fantasy!   

                                                    

Settle? I remember a few times in my life where being a character in someone else's shallow fantasy lit me up and opened my eyes. Settle hell, it was great.

L o n d o n   F o g wrote:

I just prefer being shallow!

"Lowered expectations" and you'd be rarely disappointed...

Jeffrey M Fletcher wrote:

Settle? I remember a few times in my life where being a character in someone else's shallow fantasy lit me up and opened my eyes. Settle hell, it was great.

Well... I said "at this very moment"... to settle could be a non permanent situation...

Francisco Castro wrote:
...as separate as church and state.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roger_Williams

Roger Williams would approve of that m.o.!

Karl Barbosa Photo wrote:
Can models and photographers date? Sure! You both have a shared passion and it's only normal that this happens. I dated a model for a couple of years myself.

Should models or photographers approach shoots as a dating prospect? Absolutely not! Stay professional. If it so happens that you continue hanging out afterwards to become friends or lovers, that's fine. But don't hit on anyone during a shoot.

I would love to have (female) models hitting on me.