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Models: ever feel judged for your looks?
Have you ever lost friends or have been treated shitty for the way you look due to jealousy or intimidation? Especially by other women. Sep 01 13 06:39 am Link Not that I know of. But I also think that someone who claims that people don't like her because of how she looks has some problems that go beyond just her physical appearance. Sep 01 13 06:53 am Link An interesting question - I have not lost friends, but most of my friends are a part of the 'industry' (it does sort of take over your life after a while...) and those that are not I have known for a long time before considering them friends, and they become aware of my modelling fairly early on. However, I do not look like a 'model' - in fact I've found a lot of models don't look like models. The most popular reaction I receive to knowledge of my modelling is people (often people I barely know) wanting me to get them involved and organise shoots for them - sort of a 'well she is short and fat and modelling, so obviously I can model too' more than jealously. The jealousy tends to come after, when they have signed up to here or another website expecting to be signed in three weeks and a superstar in four. 'Taint my problem though! I don't put up with body-critical, jealous or bitchy people, and it's a great way of weeding them out quickly  Maybe if I looked more modelish I'd have more of a problem...Sep 01 13 06:55 am Link Gianna Virginia wrote: No, in fact since modeling I've gotten more attention then I ever had back in school. This ugly duckling is now Top Model in the eyes of those that use to tease me. Sep 01 13 06:57 am Link When I first started I had several photographers on this site tell me I wouldn't make it because I'm short, ugly and basically modeling is not for me. And I've also had others tell me the same exact thing but it doesn't matter. Those people who used to tease me in high school are now asking me how to get into modeling and I'm just brushing them off. You just gotta take all of this with a grain of salt. And since I'm a contortionist and dancer, I guess thos Sep 01 13 07:13 am Link My best female friend since high school refuses to even look at my modeling photos. She wanted to be a model when she was a teen and she had a bad experience so didn't go through with it. She has major issues when it comes to me modeling. I try not to take it personally. Sep 01 13 07:39 am Link Isis22 wrote: Wow, that's pretty sad Isis Sep 01 13 07:45 am Link Ohh yes, I deal with the mean girls. I've had one in particular going around to other photographers and models telling them not to work with me and making up false claims just to hurt my reputation and even my personal life. I had a so-called friend who always acted very jealous of me, I eventually blocked her because of her foul behavior. She got angry and just to get back at me, she befriended everyone that gave me such a hard time so they could attack me on here and other sites. It was really ugly. I even had people I never met on Facebook bashing me on my modeling and photography pages. It got to the point that I had to contact a lawyer. I have had my fair share of jealous girls, but some people take it way too far.  I still run into catty women from time to time but I have learned to take it with a grain of salt. I focus on the positive things in my life. I have a beautiful son that just turned 2, I have a wonderful family that is very supportive, and I have close girlfriends that I love very much. It's silly to be jealous and nasty to other girls because they feel threatened by another girl's appearance. I'm glad my girlfriends don't really give a damn about how I am a model, instead, I'm their online gamer companion and fellow zombie hunter. :p Sep 01 13 08:10 am Link I guess so. Sometimes I get comments on my fan page saying I'm too small/too thin, mostly by random women, sometimes men though. That's about it to my knowledge anyway. Sep 01 13 08:24 am Link I had a photographer spend the whole hour i was shooting with him tell me I would only ever be a model if I did nudes because Im short a whole hour of hearing how I'll never get anywhere. If it wasnt horrible weather outside of that treehouse and my car wasnt a mile away I would have left. those photos were the worst ones ive ever done. you could see how mad i was in my every move. never working with him again. Sep 01 13 08:33 am Link I would say I get more put-downs and judgmental comments from people on this site than I do from friends or strangers I meet in real life. Sep 01 13 08:34 am Link Elizabeta Rosandic wrote: +1 Sep 01 13 08:41 am Link Ashley S Bell wrote: Damn, that is terrible! Why would a photographer work with a model and then turn around and say something like that? I don't get the mindset of tearing down a model for her looks, ambitions, or goals just because you can. I'm sorry that happened to you. Sep 01 13 08:47 am Link Elizabeta Rosandic wrote: I have a very pretty 12yo niece who gets treated badly by her class mates because they are jealous.My niece is very sweet, so no it doesn't always have to do with the person. People get jealous of other people strickly based on looks alone. It does happen. Sep 01 13 08:50 am Link Natalia_Taffarel wrote: That's mature you don't even know me. Plus, I did not say whether I was talking about myself, so seems you have a nasty agenda to tear me down. Very idiotic behavior and pointless as well since you added nothing but hate to the topic. Sep 01 13 08:57 am Link Natalia_Taffarel wrote: You don't know what I look like? Look to your left thats me. Duh.... Sep 01 13 08:59 am Link It is difficult to get women I find attractive to get along long enough for me to work with them in the studio. Even though I am not involved with any of them. Sep 01 13 09:15 am Link Gianna Virginia wrote: No, I just read your posts. Sep 01 13 09:49 am Link Gianna Virginia wrote: Same thing happened to me when I was a little. I've had so many girls come up to me and ask how I dealt with it because I model now and I was always open about it. It still happens but I just don't care anymore about the insults. Sep 01 13 09:53 am Link Gianna Virginia wrote: Yeeep. Main reason most of my friends are guys. I have enough bs in my life I don't need petty crap like that. Sep 01 13 10:07 am Link Elizabeta Rosandic wrote: +1 (but I'm not a model) Sep 01 13 10:49 am Link Michael Sergio Barnes wrote: Then why are you posting? My subject heading does say models.... Sep 01 13 11:28 am Link Yes, especially as a little kid and pre-teen. I was considered to be ugly as sin by my peers. Tallness was valued in female peers, and I was always the shortest kid, and the curviest at a very early age. The "prettiest" girls who got the most respect socially were very tall and thin. Even as an adult, in daily life, I'm not looked on by strangers as being particularly physically attractive. I had someone the other day tell me I look like a Cabbage Patch Kid, so.... Yeah... there's everyday "hot people," and then there are people who are photogenic. It's pretty different. I do not talk about modeling, or show pictures to anyone except my significant other. I do not talk to anyone I grew up with; they all look old, weathered and rough these days. Most of the tall, skinny girls are now overweight with several children they did not plan on having. Sep 01 13 11:28 am Link Sep 01 13 01:07 pm Link Gianna Virginia wrote: Pretty sure he's free to do so regardless of what your subject heading indicates. Sep 01 13 01:24 pm Link Yes :\ I did a shoot recently and one of the photos was cropped to shoulder level, it just so happens that I look naked even though I'm not. I had several comments from 'friends' saying I made them feel insecure and questioning how my partner felt about it. It was actually really disappointing for me because I am plan to jump into doing nudes soon so it was cruddy to see how even a photo where I *looked* naked wasn't well received. Sep 01 13 01:47 pm Link Gianna Virginia wrote: Yes, for dabbling into fetish and nude work. That one model then told my then boyfriend that I was doing porn. She also did nude work, but she was beyond all the stigmata because her work was art and mine wasn't. Sep 01 13 03:41 pm Link I this the model version of "don't hate be because I'm beautiful" ? Personally, I never hate them because they're beautiful, it's usually because they are shallow or full of themselves. Sep 01 13 03:53 pm Link I think in my case people just kind of think I am delusional like "Sure you are a model... keep thinking that" unless they have seen my work. And even then I think they see me as "just" an internet model who shoots nudes. I live in a weird little niche because I do not shoot enough fetish or erotic stuff to have a fan following or a photographer base wanting to shoot that with me, I shoot art nudes but I am not especially bendy unfortunately so I think I may be sort of boring there too, I do not have a very unique or cool alt look, and I have never been able to break into doing any kind of wardrobe modeling though I know a lot of other shorties do get into modeling for indie designers. I can pose and I do have a somewhat desirable look for some people, but not as much I would like. I mention all of that because a lot of my friends and therefore acquaintances know about modeling and such to some degree so they would see those things possibly. The fact that I am unable to do much modeling due to health issues does not help my case. Thankfully those who do see me model at least appreciate that I have some skill, even if that skill is not super special or sought after. People definitely make judgements too. Being a nude model makes a lot of people think you are automatically a lot of other things too, most of them involving "loose morals" and being a partier. And then when they find out I am married, monogamous, and not a drinker or a smoker I think they get a little disappointed  On the fun side the first time people who have known me in a another context see my nude photos I think they are a bit surprised because I do look so boring and I act so nice and a bit reserved, so how could I take my clothes off for photos artistic as they may be in my own mind? And then I am also around a lot of the fetish crowd which seems to also make people assume things that they later find out to be not true about me and that may disappoint as well. But really, I think more women probably dislike me for the fact that I am "tiny" than for me being a model. I have had a lot of discussions on this, obviously... then again, I may be totally off base with a lot of it. This is just from what I can gather from interactions and such. Thankfully, I am okay with it other than wishing I was able to model more and who does not want to be highly sought after by at least the right crowd? ^_~ Sep 01 13 04:11 pm Link Vector One Photography wrote: +1000 Sep 01 13 04:12 pm Link No, if so I don't notice really. I do get approached by random people to take photos with them and compliments. Sep 01 13 04:13 pm Link I have had that issue. recent and in the past. I was the front person for a band at one time and I would get snide remarks and hear nasty statements. Once after a fund raiser event we played a regular customer came up and said how sorry she was for anything she may have said or thought. She said she had been narrow minded and judged me on my dress and looks on stage and it never occurred to her that I was just playing a role on stage and was a real person with a real life. I thanked her and she was a great fan and follower after that! Sep 01 13 04:22 pm Link thats not just a "for models" questions Sep 01 13 07:36 pm Link I'd had a few friends/extended family members who were like "lol you look like crap without all that photoshop/makeup"  Whatever.Sep 01 13 07:39 pm Link My few female friends have been supportive of me when I told them I was going to model. The only time my friends have judged my based on looks was when we've been clothes shopping together because I have so much trouble finding my size in the styles I want. My many male friends have been suggesting it for years probably so they could someday see a picture of me in ways they would never see in person. I do feel judged by my looks by the public which is why I don't actually try to look great when I'm just doing random stuff. My everyday outfits have also been selected to de-emphasize my chest because I don't like how big I am there and because I'm really tired of catching guys blatantly staring. Sep 01 13 10:06 pm Link I dont think i really lost any friends to jealousy and the like...more like once I became a full-time traveling model I ceased to have anything in common with the people I was friends with before that. I come from a small town in the middle of nowhere, so I was on a plane across the continent and they were sitting at home in their parents house taking care of their newborn... we didnt really have much to talk about, and I was never around when people called me up last minute to hang out. They didnt really *get* what I was doing and why I would do it, they didnt care who I worked with last week or what awesome photos we made, and I didnt care about their home drama and what their kid stuck up his nose recently. We grew apart. The only people I have in my life now are artist-types who, if they dont themselves belong to the model/photographer industry, can at least appreciate or understand why I am and what makes me happy about it. Ive certainly had lots of strangers be bitchy about what I do, out of jealousy or hatred for nudity or something... (derp...pretend this came from my model profile) Sep 02 13 12:13 am Link No not really . I'm rather average looking plus I value my personal relationships a lot. And I don't care about the others. That's a pretty conflict-free way of living.Sep 02 13 12:46 am Link Not so much as the occasional "did you see that?She's anorexic/ not weraing a bra (MAKE ME A FUCKING BRA THAT FITS AND ILL WEAR IT, YOU FUCKING PRUDE BITCHES), etc, etc. Whatever. What does bug me though, is when folks think i was somehow blessed with this... Well, lemme tell yer all sommet: It's not my good genes. My entire family is obese, and I WORKED my way from.a size 12 to sizes 4 and 2. It's not my "pretty" face. It's the fucking 15k i have put into it, braces, nose job, etc. It's not that i don't eat. But i don't have to eat an entire weeks worth of food in two meals, you greedy bastards! And It's not like i look.like this when I roll out of the hay in the afternoon, cause, let's be serious, ONLY Kim Kardashian does...or so I've been told. No, I'm not a ballet dancer/natural/makeupwhatyouwill I have a room full of mirrors to practice poses and dance in, and I do still edit my 1500 pix from.most shoots in order to.improve. People who assume that there is Not a whole bunch of work going on, that somehow I got lucky doing this, without regard of the hungry/tired/cold/lonely irk me. Lots. Sep 02 13 12:47 am Link I have had a couple of interesting experiences relating to this question. I reconnected with my ballet friends not too long ago. They were my best friends for a dozen years while I was growing up. When I tried to talk about industry stuff, they said I sounded jaded and seemed very taken aback. Models are obligated to look at themselves objectively. It's not ego or being blase. In my case, it was saying my tits are too big and I'm too old for mainstream fashion - which is a straight up fact. To women playing the game of competition for men's affection, this can be majorly threatening. It's not necessarily jealous, but they're still locked in this game, and models have to discern how our looks fit into a market, not some larger male dominated ideal. I've also had people who refuse, literally point blank argue the fact that anything could ever be wrong in my life. Once again this is a case of people buying into the idea that a woman is only worth her looks. In which case, bam, I won the lotto. Life doesn't actually work that way though. This has terminated some relationships very quickly, because I sure as hellfire am not going to waste my time convincing you that I'm a living breathing human. There's definitely others that fall into the typically 'don't hate me because I'm beautiful' category. There's being treated different day to day. If I dress in a skirt that's too short, people assume that I'm a skank, give me the stink eye, and all that jazz. Most of it I can acknowledge for what it is and move on. It registers much more deeply when it strikes on a personal level, or when people I considered close are affected by my looks. Keep being yourself. The true friends end up showing themselves. And like Evie said, once you're in the industry, you start meeting awesome people who understand your day to day life. I wouldn't trade my model friends for the world. Sep 02 13 01:00 am Link I have also had a lot of experiences involving this subject, but I think while I was going to beauty school last December I had the worst of it. I wore a pair of peep-toe heels when I was just starting (open toed shoes are against the rules) and the results ranged from having photos taken of me when I was unaware//posting them to a hate page about me, to getting called at about how there's ''no strippers allowed''.. Not to mention dead silence and hostile glares when I entered a room. Sep 02 13 01:15 am Link |
