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Models: Do you have a jealous boyfriend?
I wouldn't be modeling at all if it was not for my husband. He has been my biggest supporter in this, as he should be. A relationship is not worth being in if you partner does not support you with regard to the things you are passionate about. Aug 04 11 01:10 pm Link He just doesn't like having you look better than him LOL Aug 04 11 01:10 pm Link Rachel Jay wrote: It's so sickening the way these people work. Aug 04 11 01:11 pm Link I wasn't going to say anything but, after reading all the posts...hell with it: I'm currently in Southern WV. You can't swing a cat around here without hitting at least 5 douchebags like that. Most of them are jobless dumbasses that's lived off their significant other since they were your age. They're now well past their 30's and some even way past that. My point is, these women stayed with these jacktards, gave up whatever it was they really wanted to do just so that jobless fuck wouldn't get mad and beat the ever-lovin' shit outta them. I truly wish I was exaggerating any part of this but I see it every day. You're young. If you see jealousy now, you'll see it later as well. Good luck and God bless... Aug 04 11 01:16 pm Link Yes, but I do what I want to do. He knows I will do it anyway regardless of what he is thinking and that he can't come with me. Sometimes he does have a hunch about things though (someone just wants to sleep with me). I really hate when that happens. Grrrr... Aug 04 11 01:18 pm Link My boyfriend is the same way we've been together or 3 years. And he thinks that its stupid and a waste of time and tells me to get a real job. BTW I work 3 jobs. He wants to go to shoots but doesn't so I don't allow him to because his vibe will kill everything. I told him to other day that this is what I want to do I'm putting my money into it so he needs to grow up and find something else to complain about. Aug 04 11 01:20 pm Link you're 16 and you have way too many possibilities and things to look forward to.. if someone is already holding you back from what you want to do then get rid of them. Aug 04 11 01:23 pm Link Megan Tomas wrote: That's a huge red flag:-( Aug 04 11 01:38 pm Link OhJessie wrote: Supportive, understanding, compassionate, loving, accepting, strong, positive, happy, productive ... these are all words I think of when considering what a successful relationship is like. Sounds like yours? Aug 04 11 02:19 pm Link Actually all my girlfriends have enjoyed bragging that they're dating a model, which is pretty annoying to me given that I don't like advertising my job outside the industry. Maybe men have different feelings about it, but jealousy has never been an issue in my personal experiences. Aug 04 11 02:37 pm Link I think mine is more jealous that he can't join me in photoshoots, since I always tell him how much fun I have and the money I sometimes get is nice. I think jealous is too strong of a word in my case, but you get the point. I've had a few guys who are brag they are talking to a model, but I've gotten used to it. Aug 04 11 02:47 pm Link Megan Tomas wrote: No, it has everything to do with this. You are WAY too young to have the type of boyfriend that is trying to impede your development and progress as a model. Megan Tomas wrote: What is he angry about, exactly? Megan Tomas wrote: Well, I'm glad we got that straightened out. Aug 04 11 02:50 pm Link Vaudeville wrote: +100,000,000 Aug 04 11 02:57 pm Link Megan Tomas wrote: If you want to deal with that crap, it's all you......but life is too short. Very infantile. Jealousy is a negative force that really destroys the quality of life, and relationships. Aug 04 11 03:58 pm Link Thanks everyone for the advice, you guys are awesome I actually just had a very long talk with my bf... I explained to him that modeling is very important to me; I take it very seriously. But not only is it my future; It is something I enjoy very much. He said that he will "work on" accepting it and supporting me. Well, that's better than nothing I guess. Let's see how this goes..... Aug 04 11 08:01 pm Link Jealousy comes from weakness, dump the punk! Dorothy Stratten had a jealous BF, he finally killed her. Aug 04 11 08:18 pm Link This isn't a boyFriend. This is a Control Freak. ;-) -JULIAN Aug 04 11 08:27 pm Link Fredrica von Kelsum wrote: Ohhh, you moved! I figured you were traveling. Enjoy the west coast and good luck in your new home! Aug 04 11 09:05 pm Link Megan Tomas wrote: Physical attraction=important. Aug 04 11 09:18 pm Link dump him, it is that simple. Aug 04 11 09:46 pm Link Megan Tomas wrote: Wow...that was a huge concession on his part! Megan Tomas wrote: If you say so. Aug 04 11 09:47 pm Link My girlfriend and I met through modeling so we were doing it way before we even met. We are on tour right now and shes actually shooting downstairs and I'm chilling in the photographers room. Its tougher for me to get work since I'm male and do alt./fetish stuff. Its been a lot of going to shoots with her and sometimes having to walk around somewhere for a couple hours in a strange city since the photographer doesn't want me there, which is understandable. But I always offer to leave or help the photographer move stuff, sometimes doing shit work, but you have to do shit work to earn the things you want in life. She does a lot of nude work and erotic work and she loves every minute of it. I could never take that away from her. Shes been doing it long before she met me. While a lot of people would not be comfortable with that, I trust her. Its a scary thing, I will admit. Putting trust in someone is a really hard thing to do. But when she finishes, she always thanks me for understanding and being laid back about it. Now, if I was posting in this thread five years ago, I'd be the complete opposite. You need to talk to your boyfriend about this and let him know that you love to do this. If he loves you like he says he does, he will understand. You have to do what makes YOU happy, even if people around you don't agree with it or understand it. If he makes you choose between modeling or him....he is not worth it. I know that is something you don't want to hear, but it is the truth. Aug 04 11 09:48 pm Link Valentine Laroche wrote: Thank you. Aug 05 11 02:10 am Link Yes, I have a "rather jealous" boyfriend and this issue has been brought up before in our couple. I used to model before we met - also for erotic sites - so he knew what kind of girl he was dating when we started. By the way, it seemed to still be an issue for him... but we've talked, talked, talked. And, luckily, we've made deals about it. Communication is always a win Aug 05 11 06:21 am Link Well, I think it's important for you to identify his concerns and deal with them. I had a girlfriend who did modelling on the internet - I was unhappy about it, and I told her I wanted her to stop. I had good reasons, and they had absolutely nothing to do with jealousy. And she stopped - she doesn't model any more. You need to identify the problem before finding the solution. Aug 05 11 06:36 am Link I used to. And now he is gone from the picture. Aug 05 11 07:34 am Link Vaudeville wrote: +1000 Aug 05 11 07:40 am Link Megan Tomas wrote: He does not love you, but he does feel like he owns you. Aug 05 11 07:40 am Link I had a bf kind of like this and it made work INCREDIBLE stressful and he'd even sometimes try to make me late for shoots. Even though this is my FULL TIME job and what was paying OUR bills. Obviously this relationship didn't work out. I'm now seeing someone whos incredibly supportive and loves to see and talk about my work, and has even driven me 7+ hours so I could do a shoot! AND doesn't mind waiting in the car for four hours while I go work! Aug 05 11 08:08 am Link Update: He doesn't understand how important modeling is to me. I have a huge shoot in NYC tomorrow, and apparently modeling is "more important" than him because I'm going to the shoot instead of seeing him. Apparently I don't care about him and only about modeling. Okay, modeling is VERY important to me, but I do care about him too. Instead of supporting me and wishing me luck, he's making me feel horrible for going. Yay. Aug 05 11 03:40 pm Link Megan Tomas wrote: Guilt and Jealousy Aug 05 11 04:04 pm Link Granted he's a boy, but what kind of friend is that, who get's mad cause you're good at something. Aug 05 11 04:08 pm Link My boyfriend isn't a photographer, model or artist in any way. In fact he's a teacher. He supports me 100% and loves seeing the images I produce. When I had to make the choice to travel or not he said that I should since it would benefit me and that no matter how long or how far I was it wouldn't make a difference to "us". We skyp and talk on the phone when I'm gone. You don't have to be in a relationship like that, but you do have to make the choice to either stay in it and deal with the bullshit or get out. No one here can make that for you. ~Mercy Aug 05 11 04:11 pm Link Extreme Body Art wrote: This. Aug 05 11 05:02 pm Link I'm not reading the previous posts, the OP only. So this has probably been said before: If he can't support you in what you love, then say goodbye. I'm pretty sure you'll be happier when you come out the other side! You're only 16- I can 100% guarantee you that this man isn't the love of your life. Aug 05 11 06:28 pm Link Megan Tomas wrote: He's being selfish. Shouldn't he, being two years your senior, be a little more mature than this nonsense? Could you ever see yourself treating him in such a manner for something he loved (whether you loved it as well or not?) Aug 05 11 09:00 pm Link Let me tell you a quick [read: super long] story: I used to have a boyfriend who didn't support me in my life decisions. He once told me "I started dating a smart journalism student, and who am I dating now? A model?" At the time, I was on my way to graduating with honors, while modeling and holding up two jobs while he could barely hold one. He was incredibly jealous-- but guess what-- that aside, he was a great guy. He can't handle having a girlfriend who models. That's the long and short of it. He didn't like the idea of me acting, where I might have to kiss another guy. It's not for everyone. But I thought it was something we could work through. We stayed together for 2 and a half years, in a mostly happy relationship. Aside from his jealousy at my guy friends (many were exs) and modeling, he treated me incredibly well. Our personalities synced like no one else I'd ever met and he was very intelligent, and very caring. So what happened? I let things slide, and the relationship built and built, with him wanting to get married and still not making any progress in supporting me in what I wanted to do, thinking I would just "outgrow" it. When I could take the jealousy issues anymore, I broke it off. Two and a half years, and he really didn't see it coming. While what happened needed to happen, I really wish I would have ended it when I saw things being a problem. We stayed together each expecting the other to "change," using the word "grow" in place of it. It just ended up hurting us more, because we were together for so long and really loved and cared about each other. My point: Think hard. Don't just stay together because it's easier than hurting the other person. It will only make things worse in the long run. Aug 05 11 09:10 pm Link He knew you were modelling when you started dating so he needs to learn to deal with it. Aug 05 11 10:04 pm Link Maybe he wants to be a model ;D *wink* *nudge* Okay seriously, I have had a jealous mom's boyfriend/husband, does that count? But in either case, it's none of his business, but more importantly "why do you have a boyfriend like that?" I think having a protective boyfriend is helpful and healthy, but someone who is jealous of you being a model is actually really weird and creepy sounding. Aug 06 11 12:35 am Link He doesn't like you to expose your things in front of others... He may be thinking that somebody else might take you away from him ... Sounds crazy but that might be the thing Aug 06 11 12:44 am Link |