Selene Cleveland wrote:
here's the thing. that terrible photographer you said i used...is my fucking husband. so why dont you watch your tongue? yeah thanks. and as for your critique? you can bite me. k? thanks!

Oh my. Testy, testy. If you want your ass kissed, just read your comments.
You asked for a critique. You don't like it...you shouldn't have asked.

btdsgns wrote:
What do you think about this image...

Your other stuff is way fucking better. Waaay better. This is okay.  Her facial expression is a little off, and the whole shot looks sort of...haphazard.  Most of yours are excellently planned and fantastically executed, and maybe it's just the close up sort of view, but this one doesn't seem to have that sort of polish to it. I do like your light and colors though .

Selene Cleveland wrote:
well im quite sure when you ask for a critique you are asking for some helpful advice, not having your life insulted. and yes i am testy. one usually gets slightly pissed when her HUSBAND is royally insulted.

Selene - look up the word "critique."

Selene Cleveland wrote:
well im quite sure when you ask for a critique you are asking for some helpful advice, not having your life insulted. and yes i am testy. one usually gets slightly pissed when her HUSBAND is royally insulted.

Edited.
Selene. If you want to keep whining, go ahead and pm me. It'll be great. You'll cry. Your husband will want to kick my ass. I'll play back and forth with you until I'm bored.  It keeps my impeccable wit sharp.

Please stop trying to de-rail my thread. I don't want a trainwreck.

Selene Cleveland wrote:
well im quite sure when you ask for a critique you are asking for some helpful advice, not having your life insulted. and yes i am testy. one usually gets slightly pissed when her HUSBAND is royally insulted.

Looks like she used the word "Photographer" and not Husband. Her crit is dead on, thats why its called that. Not Flowers and sunshine, its a critical examination of whats posted. You owe Heather an Apology for bad behavior

/sorry to derail Heather.

Selene Cleveland wrote:
well im quite sure when you ask for a critique you are asking for some helpful advice, not having your life insulted. and yes i am testy. one usually gets slightly pissed when her HUSBAND is royally insulted.

Insulted because he needs to work on his photography? Hope he isn't planning on doing anything high end where they are really honest and literally laugh in your face and then ask you "Ok, where's the hidden camera? This is a joke right?" Not that I would know *grin*

Selene Cleveland wrote:
well im quite sure when you ask for a critique you are asking for some helpful advice, not having your life insulted. and yes i am testy. one usually gets slightly pissed when her HUSBAND is royally insulted.

Whether the photographer is your husband or not does not make ONE BIT of difference.

YOU asked for a critique and you got it. If you don't like it move on.

Do you really, honestly believe she should have based your critique on whether the photographer is related to you or not? That is stupid. Grow up and grow a thicker skin or quit asking for critiques.


Get a  photographer that is not related to you so you don't have to take critiques in such an immature personal manner.

Xeris - Dwight wrote:

Whether the photographer is your husband or not does not make ONE BIT of difference.

YOU asked for a critique and you got it. If you don't like it move on.

Do you really, honestly believe she should have based your critique on whether the photographer is related to you or not? That is stupid. Grow up and grow a thicker skin or quit asking for critiques.


Get a  photographer that is not related to you so you don't have to take critiques in such an immature personal manner.

WORD, Dwight!

Lindsey Arnold wrote:
me too pleaseee!

Hi Lala!
How's it going?
I'll start out by mentioning that at 5'3, expecting to get work from fashion designers and boutiques is extremely unrealistic unless you've got some friends in the business.  Promotional is a great route though, because that definitely requires you to be pretty and outgoing, but not necessarily tall.  And I don't know if you would consider glamour, but you could probably do that too.

I'm going to compress your page a little, to make it sound a little smoother.
My name is Lindsey Arnold but if you want, call me LaLa! I am a model from New Orleans, Louisiana. I am 5'3, but my legs are endless.  I love the performing arts, and would like make a career in both singing and modeling.

I am currently seeking both paid and TF* jobs with different photographers, magazines, fashion designers, and boutiques, and am also accepting promotional and art work.

I am a very fun person. I'm spontaneous and outgoing. (You don't need to say your verbal, that comes right along with being outgoing)

Anyone wanting to book a shoot or show with me:
Please send me your contact information, job information, and proposed compensation via email, yahoo messenger, or mayhem message.

To contact me:

Here!
Myspace- www.myspace.com/this_is_me__lala
(This is MODEL mayhem. If people are interested in your singing skills, don't hesitate to send them to your page, but you don't need to put it here.)

Please take out the photos here. You still have blank spaces in your portfolio, and some of the ones you have posted on the front page are not the best quality.

Credits:
Your list is good.

After that, please insert any promo or print you've done (Like UV Girl)

Now to the photos...

This is a lovely image of you, and anything like a tear sheet is always good to have If this was printed anywhere, it definitely belongs on your credits.


This is a very senior portrait pose, and the crop is kind of weird, but you look very nice, so keep it until you have better.


Nice emotion here. This is a beautiful shot. Keep it.


This seems really bland compared to the black and white in the same shirt, you look sort of bored, and your chin is tucked into your shoulder. I would take this out.


This is nice. Good work, on both you and the photographer.


The pose on this is good, but the lighting makes your skin look weird, you're blown out and sort of yellow at the top and heavily shadowed and orangey at the bottom. If you want to keep this one, please ask the photographer for a closer crop so you don't have so much empty space above and below you.


You are fantastic here, but the photo itself is lackluster. It looks like it was slightly blurry when taken, then over sharpened to try to fix it.


This is fantastic. Your pose is amazing (i could never hold that without falling flat on my back, and that's assuming I could do it in the first place!) The effects are really nice, too.


This is sort of grainy and your expressions don't really match. I'd take it down, it doesn't represent you well.


This one is marginally better, but it's still grainy, and the color effect combined with the angle give it sort of a myspace feel. Leave it for now, but when you update, make sure this is on the list to be rotated out.


My god. You do have some legs. This entire photo is tilted slightly to the right, but otherwise, it's cool.


I can see your face clearly here, but your leg blocks so much of your body. This is another one that I'd rotate out when you update.


Gorgeous. Your photographer did a fantastic job, your make up is wonderful, and you look so...condescendingly annoyed. Win!


This is a super cute idea, but an awful photo. And..do you have braces in this one? Keep it for the emotion, ditch it as soon as you can.


Hot summer day, check. Well done.

Overall, you are off to a good start. More work, more photographers, and your portfolio will surely be stunning. Right now just need better photos with more variety, but so far, you don't suck

Heather LeStabbityDeath wrote:

Words, words, words. I like words, but not yours.  You have no personality here. It's just...blah. Grab attention. Say something about yourself.
I shoot swimwear, glamour, and studio photography. This is/is not my full time job, so I am/am not always available for appointments. I look better in a bikini than Patsy Cline, but I'd still love to shoot you.

If you expect to get paid, don't call yourself 'semi-professional looking for more exposure'.   

Please message me for rates or select testing or TF* opportunities.
Thanks,
Joe

As for your photography, swimwear and glamour are way way away from my style. A quick off the cuff pointer is-watch your backgrounds. For the most part they are fine, but there are a few that are visible wrinkly, or in on location shots, where behind the models head is a little busy.





and

Are probably the two I like best.

Thanks for your input I do appreciate you input.

Uniquely U Images wrote:
Have fun and try to enjoy your visit!

Hello, Jamie.
We'll start with profile, move to pictures.

HEY! Welcome my Model Mayhem page! I'm Jamie Allbee, a 21 year old female photographer! I am outgoing, and love colors and expressive work. I'm willing, able, and excited to work with just about anyone.

I work grave yards, so my schedule is pretty flexible, and TFCD, so payment is easy for everyone.
Call me: (509) 216 - 4184
or email me at...
[email protected]
I can't wait to hear from you!

(Do not advertise for other sites on your MM page, it makes Tyler cry, but there is a place for your website, you can put modelbuzz there instead of myspace. It's always nice to link something besides myspace anyway)

Credits:
If you've worked with anyone on MM, or have had your stuff printed anywhere, here is a good place to mention that.


Very carnival/freakshow feeling. Awesome. The lighting is intense, and really draws attention to the face paint (whoever did the face also wins, that's awesome).


This is really pretty, and the leaves by the eye are definitely awesome. This shot is very good, but her background is boring. I would have put her somewhere else to make it more interesting. Since she's got leaves on her face, maybe somewhere with visible leaves...Otherwise, studio would probably be best.


This is really good too, lots of fun with face paint, I see . Someone commented that the colors really make this one-I think that person is right.

f
Normally, I would veto selective coloring, but on this one, it's definitely a winner. Without the color, this would be a boring high contrast shot indeed, and fully colored, I think you'd lose a lot of the intensity of her lips and eyes. This should be a cd cover for some weird norwegian metal band.


This would be more believable if you could have trashed the dress a little, but overall, I like it.


Lovely head shot.


Also awesome. I think there's a just a little too much shadow on the left side of her face, maybe a reflector would have helped lighten it a little without totally killing the shadows?


The focus on this is really weird, I'm not sure if it's actually the focus or if it's just the way her hair is, but the focal point of this one ends up being her chest and her lips, and it should be her lips and her eyes.


I see a bright future in senior portraits here...


Oh noes! Not the graffiti wall! The hat turned sideways and the wall behind her give this one a parody feel, which means it's hilarious


I wish her face was a little clearer, and that the chairs had been switched. She would look much better on the blue chair. Otherwise, definitely raver kid and her little xtc-droppin hang out.  Nicely planned.


Oh my! this is silly! I like it . It's really evenly lit, and looks like your standard prom photo, only funny!


I think the frame is excessive. The model has enough ruffles and bling that the mirror just detracts from her.


Very interesting. Definitely not a style of photography I'm familiar with, but it looks good.


I was right. With color, you lose the intensity of the face make up. I think you should take this down, the other one is much better, and same model/same outfit gets redundant. All of her color is waay to much in this setting, it's extremely out of place.


You have done well. I don't really like the batman eye make up, but that's actually just me, I think, and not any fault with the photo. I think a different color background might have worked well with this too, but overall...Thumbs Up.


If her back foot wasn't so blurry, I would love this.


Beautiful. You, your model, and your make up artist did a great job.  The green below her eyes is a bit patchy, but otherwise, I really like this.


Nicely done.


Why did you shoot this in a studio?! Put her out in the woods. Throw her in the lake. Something!

You do well in the studio. I'd like to see more from you on location, because that'll keep your shots interesting, and maybe working with more props. All in all, can you be my new friend?

Shannon Bayless wrote:
please!

Hi Shannon! My, aren't you versatile...

Your profile information is very helpful and well written. I'm going to fix a few small things-places you repeated yourself or didn't capitalize, but overall, good job!
---
I am currently only accepting tf* from select photographers who can provide wardrobe/styling.

It is my goal to create sophisticated, distinctive images; images that capture moods, feelings and personalities. I am capable of producing a wide range of image styles that can help separate you from the crowd. Hopefully by doing this I will make it to the top! My ultimate model idol is Gemma Ward.

I am an agency represented model looking to excel and develop in the which? field. I'm interested in challenging and ambitious work.  I do not do any type of nude work. (This sentence is probably unnecessary. You're 16, most people that you will want to work with won't be asking you to do nudes yet anyway I'm have been lucky to work with fabulous makeup artists and photographers.  I am very serious about modeling and approach every shoot as a professional.  My mother will accompany me on all jobs due to my age.  She is not a distraction at shoots, and will help if asked.  I am very good at giving any expression you are trying to achieve.  No photographer I have ever shot with has been disappointed!  I have reasonable rates for MM Photographers who contact me directly, $75.00 per hour.
---
Your credits are great. I'm sure you've done some paid work, and I understand that it's probably a lot. If you don't want to list where you've been paid or published, just state that a full resume is available upon request.

--
I'm going to skip the one by one review of your photos because they look like they are all good, so I'll go over the ones I really like, or that I can nitpick a little.
--

This is super cute. That bag seems very heavy! If you want a more casual look with it, and I'm sure you already know this, just straight your back a bit so it doesn't look like you're being pulled over by the weight of it.


This is fantastic. Your wardrobe and make up people did a great job, and your bubble is excellent. A+ in gum chewing!


I don't think I need to tell you how awesome your make up artist is. Can I steal her?


Wonderful head shot. Are your eyes that blue? I am jealous if they are.


Either I'm jealous or you consistently wear contacts. This is also pretty awesome.


I'm not a big fan of this one, your face looks sort of plasticy, but otherwise it's also pretty fantastic.


Cute. you look very young here.


A+. This is a great shot of you. Very attention grabbing.


I've mentioned before in this thread, usually I'm not a fan of selective coloring, all too often it looks cheesy and bad, but here it really grabs attention. This particular shot has kind of a 'temptation of eve' feeling to it. Probably because you look so innocent and there's an apple involved.


This manages to look both good, and not like you at all. Craziness!


I'm an asshat. I almost told you this was boring and you should take it down, then I read the caption.  I would move it closer to the front of your photos though, so it's right there where people see it immediately, and not lost among all the rest.


You both look really pretty here, but you also both look very topless. It doesn't seem like the kind of thing you are aiming for, but if it is, keep it.


This is beautiful. When you are updating, I would take down the other one in this outfit. The blue eye make up is more striking, but overall, the feel and the look in this are better.


This is awesome.


Lovely concept, well executed. I wish I could see it with all of your outfit and maybe a nice Victorian masquerade setting.


This has an animation sort of feel that I'm not a big fan of, but that's just a personal preference, this really is a lovely bit of fantasy work.


And this is absolutely awesome. Definite winner, on everyone's part.


You are a lovely girl, Miss Shannon, and will certainly be going places if you keep going at the pace you are now. I'd suggest a few more full length shots, and maybe one where you smile, but I think you'll be fine even without them. Good luck!

Melanie Marie wrote:
if you have time I would like to know

Your about me is haphazard and half assed. We need to fix that.
--
I have experience doing glamour and promotional modeling, and am looking to do more paid work. I would like to expand my horizons with different photographers in new styles, especially themed shoots (what kind of themes?), and will accept TF* with select photographers for those shoots. I am available in Lafayette, and travel regularly to New Orleans and L.A.
--

So is your credits.
--
Credits
Photographers:
Floyd Willis (No MM Number? No one cares. Credit him on the photo, but not here)
Barry Hart  Mayhem #41603
Cameron J Grubbs Mayhem #117152
Samuel Martino Mayhem #36064
Mark Peeler #57671


Print: (were these printed?)
Maxim Magazine July 2006
Hometown Hotties Semi Final

Promotional/Appearances:
Anheuser-Busch Convention   New Orleans   March 2007
Cardiolody Convention  New Orleans  March 2007  (what did you do at a cardiology convention?)
CAO Flavorette April 2007
1 vs 100 NBC TV Guest Maxim Model (clip available here: http://youtube.com/watch?v=hWTPiQaBENY )

Acting/Performance:
   Bourbon and Burlesque Show    House of Lounge Model  (is this all one thing? Try:
   Model  -- Bourbon and Burlesque Show  House of Lounge -- 1492 or however this works to make sense. Were you in the show? Were you handing out t-shirts?)
   Featured Extra -- College -- Released March 18 2008
   Featured Extra -- American Summer -- When?
   (Who are you?) -- Hunting and Fishing -- 2008
   (Who were you?) -- Emeril's (New place's name, please) Commercial -- 2008




You look bug-eyed here, and I know you're not.


vs.

Ditch both, or keep one. Neither is really a good image, but together they are appalling, it gets boring quickly.


You look nice here. A little stiff, over posed, but not too bad. Your shadow is really harsh, and we're losing your red dress against the red curtain


Awkward pose, snapshot quality, you have the same outfit in the next photo...Ditch it.


You look really cute here. The floor is awful, and the bright red chair distracts from you as the focus, but you look good.


This is a lovely, soft shot of you. Keep it.


Your facial expression here is bland, but it's a good upper body shot, so keep it for now.


This is another pretty picture of you. More facial expression, please?


Here, you are also very pretty, but again, you have no expression


This is sort of dark, but you look very natural, so on your part, good job.


Again, you look good, your wardrobe leaves a little to be desired, you need a better photographer.


Oh dear. This is a trashy crotch shot, and you have this same outfit already.


This would be better if you got one with just your upper body. You have a cute but and great legs, but this is not the time to show it, because your panties just don't match the setting or outfit.


Ditch this. It's boring, your outfit is not that cute, your shoes are scuffed, the area is dirty and busted up, and it's horribly lit.


Someone else said it- Nice headshot. But why...are you grabbing your tit?


Nice swimsuit shot.


This is grainy and blown out, otherwise it would be a great addition.


Again, massive blowouts ruin it.


You already have this outfit, and while I would like this pose better it's sort of dark and you are cropped oddly.

You have three major issues.
1: You need better photographers
2: You look really uncomfortable most of the time. Relax. Learn to look natural.
3: You tend to do the same facial expression, over and over again. Head turned and slightly tilted, lips slightly parted...You can do more faces than that! Do them!

On the plus side, you're very pretty, and, as I'm sure you've heard, you have a great body. Get some better photographers and more experience in front of the camera....You'll be great.

better lighting studio wrote:
are you sti;; there? would love to hear from you! is your hair dry yet?

Hi Paul.

Beginning at the beginning:
Hello
        My name is Paul Slate. I'm from Monson, Ma 01057.
I have been a photographer for about 20 years. I like all aspects of photography, but am just now starting to get into shooting models. I would like to add some creative  artistic, bodyscapes and portraits to my portfolio. Please feel free to contact me if you are interested in a shoot. I do tfcd or tfp up to 13X19. If there are any MUA's or wardrobe people out there looking for a photographer to help them with their portfolio, I love to trade! (if you want to sideline as a retoucher, make a retouching port. on here and link it)

Thank you for looking through my portfolio.


This is okay, but her make up is really spotty, and I think her eyes were re-touched...Excessively so. Not only are they the only thing in focus, but they are so bright that they don't just draw attention, they drown out the rest of her face.


Everything here also is out of focus, except her eyes, her bottom lip, and her shirt. It has a sort of headache inducing affect, because it's a drastic difference.


The fan in the background makes this a little too busy, but lighting is key here.  She is very well lit, and definitely the focus, however, he, too, should be part of the photo and not just 'man prop'. His jacket is lit, but his face is not, making him look like an accidental addition. That feeling is intensified because she all there, with extra space to her right, whereas he is cut off along his arm.


Here again, we have a focusing issue. Your camera caught her leg, leaving the rest of her body, including her face, slightly out of focus.


Focus! This time it's her eyes and her hair, leaving the rest of her hand and her face blurred. The lighting is also a little too bright for someone as pale as she is, you have blow outs on her nose and one cheek. Curiously, why is her hand dead white, when no other part of her body is?


Muuch better. Everything is in focus, she's well framed and well lit, all she needs is to swipe those two hairs off of her face.

http://modelmayhm-4.vo.llnwd.net/d1/pho … f0f773.jpg
This is pretty good.

http://modelmayhm-4.vo.llnwd.net/d1/pho … 0cf093.jpg
I don't like her facial expression, and I think you should have shot at a slightly different angle so we can't see the drainage gate above her head.


I don't know what your obsession is with making people's eyes look to be fake colors through editing or lighting, but, well, here's another example.

https://img9.modelmayhem.com/070803/09/ … 7dbc9d.jpg
The harsh light doesn't benefit this one as well as it did the other of her, a reflector near  her feet might have given you a better look.


What is going on behind her?

https://img9.modelmayhem.com/070802/09/ … 044896.jpg
Nice. A light change so she was well lit, instead of half lit, might have helped...But maybe not.

https://img9.modelmayhem.com/070801/22/ … 196fba.jpg
A tip in art nudes--most of the time, they shouldn't cut the model off at the knees unless she's knee high in water or foliage.

https://img9.modelmayhem.com/070801/21/ … ae8155.jpg
There is massive blow out on her chest and face, and the lower half of her is lost in your darkness. Is she wearing boots? It is not good.

https://img9.modelmayhem.com/070801/20/ … f54d26.jpg
Way too bright.  Blowouts everywhere.

https://img9.modelmayhem.com/070801/15/ … 5d6a0c.jpg
https://img9.modelmayhem.com/070801/15/ … c2fd63.jpg
Same model, same place, 3rd time. Get rid of at least one of them. Despite being cut off at the knees, the water has a nice effect in the 3rd one.

Gear Shifter wrote:
Me! Me!

Hi!
Your phrasing is good, your spelling and word usage is somewhat less so.
I am a 21 year old amateur model, looking for more experience and to build my portfolio.  I am comfortable with all styles, and traveling (within the state) is not an issue for me.  I am a very outgoing person and I love to try new things!

Mostly interested in:
Pin-up
Cars
Glam (glamour? or like...20s-50s Hollywood head shots?)
Fetish
Artistic
Alternative

I am currently looking for a photographer who is interested in capturing the sexy tomboy side of me.  =]  I want to do shoots outside, working on cars, with my skateboard, with baggy pants, in abandoned and decrepit buildings, etc., and with my American Bull Terrier (sidenote, pitbull is not a breed. It is a classification which includes 4 breeds, one of which is the American Bull Terrier), Chance.  I have some ideas, so please message me if you're interested.



As for your photos-You got lucky, dear, and found a good photographer straight off!
You definitely have expressions, though I'd like to see a few more, and you do a lovely job of posing. Right now, I would leave up what you have, but once you have more photos, come on back and I will nitpick at you a bit. Mostly, you just need more experience.

GennaBee wrote:
id love a critique, not that i can offer you much to look at. but if you have the time id love the input

Hello, Genna!
I see that you are new, and very serious. Capitalization will impress this seriousness upon us.

Hello all!
I'm new, but I'm very serious about modeling. M
y goal is to do almost everything.
I would love to collaborate with photographers that have new and innovative ideas. I have some of my own.
I am most interested in glamour, conceptual/artistic, alternative (retro, cyber, fetish, etc).
I have very little modeling experience, but i am a fast learner, and take direction well.
I'm pretty much my own makeup artist, as i am a cosmetologist in training.
I can and will adjust for any look that I need to.
For now I am doing TFP on weekends, I look forward to getting paid and working on weekdays.


Contact me through here, or look for me in your local garbage can.

JHMoore Photography wrote:
If you still wanted to do a critique, I'd love one

Your words are fine, straight to photos.


She has very dark shadows under her eyes, washed out skin, and a sort of blank expression. Heroin chic at it's worst?


This is a little dark, but otherwise, an okay photo.


This is very fun. It's too dark, and you cut off the toe of her boot, but otherwise, it's nice


This seems kind of pointless to me, and her chest is paler than her stomach, but whatever floats your boat. The lighting was pretty well done.


The shadows in this are really harsh, so between shadow and her hair, you're losing half of her face. She also has a really blank, sort of confused facial expression that doesn't flatter her.  Good framing though.


This is a good angle, and would succeed as a nice photo if you had only convinced her to make a face at you, any face.


This is so dark I actually had to look twice to see if her eyes were open or closed. Brighten it up, and it will be good.


I would have moved her up the stairs a bit, so the railing wasn't breaking the line of her leg. Her face is slightly out of focus, it's very dark, she probably should have been barefoot, and really, ask your models to smile or something.


Much better. Talk to the models about facial expressions.


This is pretty good, but your standing model's face is out of focus and not lit.


Cute kid...moving on.


What is going on here? I don't understand why 4 women in their underwear are in this place...You cut the lower two off at mid-calf, and they 3 out of 4 are trying to smile sexy, but aren't, and the 4th is just sort of staring off into space with her eyes pointed sort of at the camera.


Hey, chain link fence. Hello senior picture. At least it's not super dark.


This is a nice shot. Good job. You have light, without harsh shadows. She almost has a facial expression. Muuch better.


Good water capture!  But it's still soo dark.


I have one question: Why is she here? If you can answer that, this will be a good photo.

So, lighting, and facial expressions. When you can get the lights, and convince your models to have facial expressions, you will be much closer to 'the area's best portfolio photographer'

Heather LeStabbityDeath wrote:

Hi Shannon! My, aren't you versatile...

Your profile information is very helpful and well written. I'm going to fix a few small things-places you repeated yourself or didn't capitalize, but overall, good job!
---
I am currently only accepting tf* from select photographers who can provide wardrobe/styling.

It is my goal to create sophisticated, distinctive images; images that capture moods, feelings and personalities. I am capable of producing a wide range of image styles that can help separate you from the crowd. Hopefully by doing this I will make it to the top! My ultimate model idol is Gemma Ward.

I am an agency represented model looking to excel and develop in the which? field. I'm interested in challenging and ambitious work.  I do not do any type of nude work. (This sentence is probably unnecessary. You're 16, most people that you will want to work with won't be asking you to do nudes yet anyway I'm have been lucky to work with fabulous makeup artists and photographers.  I am very serious about modeling and approach every shoot as a professional.  My mother will accompany me on all jobs due to my age.  She is not a distraction at shoots, and will help if asked.  I am very good at giving any expression you are trying to achieve.  No photographer I have ever shot with has been disappointed!  I have reasonable rates for MM Photographers who contact me directly, $75.00 per hour.
---
Your credits are great. I'm sure you've done some paid work, and I understand that it's probably a lot. If you don't want to list where you've been paid or published, just state that a full resume is available upon request.

--
I'm going to skip the one by one review of your photos because they look like they are all good, so I'll go over the ones I really like, or that I can nitpick a little.
--

This is super cute. That bag seems very heavy! If you want a more casual look with it, and I'm sure you already know this, just straight your back a bit so it doesn't look like you're being pulled over by the weight of it.


This is fantastic. Your wardrobe and make up people did a great job, and your bubble is excellent. A+ in gum chewing!


I don't think I need to tell you how awesome your make up artist is. Can I steal her?


Wonderful head shot. Are your eyes that blue? I am jealous if they are.


Either I'm jealous or you consistently wear contacts. This is also pretty awesome.


I'm not a big fan of this one, your face looks sort of plasticy, but otherwise it's also pretty fantastic.


Cute. you look very young here.


A+. This is a great shot of you. Very attention grabbing.


I've mentioned before in this thread, usually I'm not a fan of selective coloring, all too often it looks cheesy and bad, but here it really grabs attention. This particular shot has kind of a 'temptation of eve' feeling to it. Probably because you look so innocent and there's an apple involved.


This manages to look both good, and not like you at all. Craziness!


I'm an asshat. I almost told you this was boring and you should take it down, then I read the caption.  I would move it closer to the front of your photos though, so it's right there where people see it immediately, and not lost among all the rest.


You both look really pretty here, but you also both look very topless. It doesn't seem like the kind of thing you are aiming for, but if it is, keep it.


This is beautiful. When you are updating, I would take down the other one in this outfit. The blue eye make up is more striking, but overall, the feel and the look in this are better.


This is awesome.


Lovely concept, well executed. I wish I could see it with all of your outfit and maybe a nice Victorian masquerade setting.


This has an animation sort of feel that I'm not a big fan of, but that's just a personal preference, this really is a lovely bit of fantasy work.


And this is absolutely awesome. Definite winner, on everyone's part.


You are a lovely girl, Miss Shannon, and will certainly be going places if you keep going at the pace you are now. I'd suggest a few more full length shots, and maybe one where you smile, but I think you'll be fine even without them. Good luck!

Best critique ive ever had- took your advice :]

Heather LeStabbityDeath wrote:

THANK YOU so very much for the extensive critique. it was very helpful. :]

Nicole Hopkins wrote:
dude id love a crit if your still giving them

Nicole, you're very verbose. Let's tone that down a bit.

Hello and thank you for your interest. I aim to create a strong portfolio including lifestyle, lingerie, editorial, swim wear, and glamour shots. I LOVE unique and vintage clothes and am thrilled to work with anyone who can provide them for a shoot.

I am currently only accepting tf* from select photographers who can provide wardrobe/styling.
-I travel for work if gas/lodging expenses are compensated (this includes Rio Rancho). -I am willing to travel out of state for select shoots I need for my portfolio (if you are not willing to pay for this travel, do not mention it).
-I do not wear leather or fur.
Current and upcoming TF* Projects And Travel:
-Glamour shoots to submit to FHM and similar
-High Fashion Make-up
-Outdoor, location shoots. (Nude? Dressed? Any particular theme?)
-Something 'bloody'-knives, needles, whatever. I'm flexible.
-"Mechanic" shoot (Still looking for the perfect muscle car)
-June 1-7 Los Angeles, looking for limited TF*

Body Modifications:
-Anti-Eyebrow piercing (angled at the outer corner of my right eye)
-Navel Ring
-Small Tattoo (descriptions, please, including location)
-Small Tattoo
-Small Tattoo
  *Tattoos can be covered easily. Piercings can/cannot be removed.


(You want an MUA Profile to work with photographers? Make one. It won't take that long. Don't take up space here, it makes you seem less serious.)
(You own and operate a bag and accessory line? Start a wardrobe stylist profile. Stop using your modeling to push your other agendas, it makes you seem like you're just modeling until something else works)

Credits (this section exists for a reason)
RC Exotic Cars promo model (2008)
PlayNowDJ.com clothing/site model (2008)
Featured-Nifty Magazine (niftymag.com) "Glamour Shots" (2008)
Miss Hawaiian Tropic Swimsuit competition finalist (2007)
Evolution Body Piercing add (2007)
www.indiekool.com site model (2007)
Dairy Queen commercial (2006)
Master Rack swimsuit calendar (2006)
(List your promo work, or say 'Full resume available on request)
(getting a suicide girls contract offer is not a 'highlight'. They aren't picky anymore, and a lot of photographers won't work with suicide girls. Mentioning them as though it's an accomplishment will not endear you to those people)

Please find your print/ezine ads and features, and put them up as tear sheets in your pictures.

Your pictures are good. You need both facial expressions and variety. In order to get variety, you may need to lighten up about wardrobe and stylists, that is awfully high maintenance for someone with almost no pictures, and one reference.

AliceLopez wrote:
me please

You have beautiful, professional images, and we both know it. Not a damn thing wrong with any of them.
You do need a full length shot.
And one of these would better serve as your avatar:

This is an excellent shot of your face, and will show up well small.
or

This is very bright and will get attention.

Now, to the part where you need some help.
Your photos say you are a professional. Your profile says 'weee! teenager! computer! stufffff!!!!!' Let's make them both say professional...

Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to stop by my page!
I am 17, and my mother is 100% supportive of my modeling. She comes to all of my shoots, due to my age.
I am of Brazilian, Cuban, Italian, and Spanish descent, and multi-lingual.

I am looking for more work as a commercial/lifestyle/whatever model. No TF* at this time, exceptions may be considered.

I have a non-exclusive contract with (insert agency). If you don't have one, you should look, in Miami, I'm sure a commercial agency would probably snap you up.

Credits: (please list your experience)
Print:

Promotional:

(and so on)

John-Anthony  wrote:
I thought I was in this one guess not

I am way down the list but will take one if you ever reach me

How's it going on? Let's get started.

Tell me a little about yourself. How long have you been doing this? Why do you love it?

I am currently testing High Fashion shots, to be added to my book. I am looking for MUAs, Stylists, and Models (Models, 5'8+, size 2-4). Please send me a message if you are interested.

I am also looking for work as an assistant in New York.

Credits:
Do you have some?


Your frame is taking away from this photo, but otherwise it's lovely. Not eye-catching, but definitely pretty.


Very nice, but you lost the toe of her shoe.  Also, I think this would be improved by a more studio setting.


Nice, but you've lost her shoe, part of her hat, and her hand is blending in with the support she's holding on to. Maybe if she had grabbed the railing, it would be better.


Beautiful, but could you sweep the floor first next time? The very corner of this photo is a mess.  You also cropped really close to her toe. Give her some space!


Beautiful headshot.  When you update, keep this and ditch the other two of her in this hat.


You need a little bit more light, you're losing lots of her hair and body. Given a tad bit more light to make her stand out against the black background, this would be awesome.


This would be better with more even lighting and a smooth backdrop. Wronked sheets are bad, mmmkay?


This is beautiful, her face is excellently lit to be the focus, and her pose is outstanding.  You did a good job.


It looks like you lit her cleavage better than her face. Probably an optical illusion caused by hair shadows, but it's still a downer to an otherwise perfect shot. No, wait...That is not an illusion, she also has blow outs on her hand.


What the fuck is up with this frame? You also have a light flare right about her elbow, but otherwise, this is lovely.


Good job.


I really can't stand this black at the top and the bottom. It's distracting.  For a 'clone' series, this is pretty good, but it's still kind of rough. Each individual shot is good, but 3's skirt has a white edge where it overlaps on 2. Not a 'lighting made you be able to see the difference' but...A real, white, edge.


Isn't she just cute? High five.


The skin of her face and part of her neck appears darker than her hands and the rest of her chest, and while this is probably make up's fault, it detracts from an otherwise extremely nice image.


This is okay. There's nothing wrong with it...But there's nothing great either.


This is a better shot of her. When you update, get rid of the other one.


Very nice, good job.


That is an amazing hat.  And a good shot. Nicely done, sir.


Allright. Rundown. Your studio stuff is very good. You need to work on location shots. But don't worry, you'll get it!

Tanya Weaver wrote:
Ooh! Me too, please.

Why am I critiquing you Tanya? You're already good
Words: A+

You have expressions and no crappy photos, so I'll go over what you should kill as you update.


Keep this one, you look sultry and cute.


This is also very nice, but the one I posted above is in the same outfit, and the one I'm linking below is very similarly posed
http://modelmayhm-4.vo.llnwd.net/d1/pho … 64c19b.jpg
Sexay lady!


You look bored!


Do not make this go away. It is fantastic.


This would be better for a photographer, we can't actually see that much of you, even if it is super cool.


This is also a keeper. It's casual, relaxed, and sort of sad.


Cute!


This you will eventually want to move out, because at full size, the background is shit and it's pretty obvious that that's not what was behind you when this was taken.

But anyway. Nothing you have sucks. You have a recurring theme of sultry/sexy, and that's awesome, but it's good that you remember to put other stuff in there too .  Keep up the good work!

Heather LeStabbityDeath wrote:

Why am I critiquing you Tanya? You're already good
Words: A+

You have expressions and no crappy photos, so I'll go over what you should kill as you update.


Keep this one, you look sultry and cute.


This is also very nice, but the one I posted above is in the same outfit, and the one I'm linking below is very similarly posed
http://modelmayhm-4.vo.llnwd.net/d1/pho … 64c19b.jpg
Sexay lady!


You look bored!


Do not make this go away. It is fantastic.


This would be better for a photographer, we can't actually see that much of you, even if it is super cool.


This is also a keeper. It's casual, relaxed, and sort of sad.


Cute!


This you will eventually want to move out, because at full size, the background is shit and it's pretty obvious that that's not what was behind you when this was taken.

But anyway. Nothing you have sucks. You have a recurring theme of sultry/sexy, and that's awesome, but it's good that you remember to put other stuff in there too .  Keep up the good work!

Oh gosh. You are too sweet! (Ill stop before ruining your rep!)


But seriously, thanks for the outside input. Its tough to know what needs to go, when you kinda get attached.