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Forums > Off-Topic Discussion > 25yr old girl wants me to take her virginity Search   Reply
first1234last
Photographer
Connor Photography
Posts: 6,426
Elkton, Maryland, US


macshot20 photography wrote:
yea, im kinda scared cuz  we are ok friends and i think has a crush on me but i dont see her like that, she says she trusts me and wants to get it over with so should i be the one to do it or should i not?. obviously im not one of those kinda guys if im asking strangers if i should do it sooooo what should i do? lmfao

Get her a dildo, the problem solved

Sep 20 12 09:48 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
ChanStudio - OtherSide
Posts: 5,317
Alpharetta, Georgia, US


macshot20 photography wrote:
yea, im kinda scared cuz  we are ok friends and i think has a crush on me but i dont see her like that, she says she trusts me and wants to get it over with so should i be the one to do it or should i not?. obviously im not one of those kinda guys if im asking strangers if i should do it sooooo what should i do? lmfao

Tell her you aren't that guy.  Ask her to find someone she loves and do it with..

Sep 20 12 09:51 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Erick Prince
Posts: 3,457
Austin, Texas, US


Morphine Dream wrote:
One of the dumbest http://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-iw5TaUpM1OI/AAAAAAAAAAI/AAAAAAAAABg/oWjr6XtVW8o/s120-c/photo.jpg threads ever.
Yeah dude is gonna post on MM that some chick wants him to pop her cherry.
Lame.

And then dude is going to post on the dumb post calling the poster lame....yeah that's cool. lol

Sep 20 12 09:53 am  Link  Quote 
Model
K Allende
Posts: 14,172
Columbus, Ohio, US


No. You already said you weren't that kind of guy, so no. It would only get messy
Sep 20 12 09:53 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
TRPn Pics
Posts: 10,431
Andrews, North Carolina, US


When you turn her down, she will respect and want you even more. It'll be like the forbidden fruit to her.


You can always both get shitfaced drunk and in the morning deny remembering anything.

Otherwise.....she's getting away
http://www.gifflix.com/files/9a1e54c00829.gif
Sep 20 12 09:55 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
ChanStudio - OtherSide
Posts: 5,317
Alpharetta, Georgia, US


Connor Photography wrote:

Get her a dildo, the problem solved

Would be the same would it?

Sep 20 12 09:56 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
RachelReilly
Posts: 1,699
Washington, District of Columbia, US


Just NO
Sep 20 12 10:15 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
UnoMundo
Posts: 47,528
Olympia, Washington, US


I see your future !! 
http://img.youtube.com/vi/I5B-314t3Uo/0.jpg
Sep 20 12 10:20 am  Link  Quote 
Model
Kendra Spring Adams
Posts: 1,031
Lincoln, Nebraska, US


macshot20 photography wrote:

No I'm not gunna put her on blast like that. This is bad enough already haha

And yet . . . this thread was posted . . . ????

Sep 20 12 10:32 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


976 Photography wrote:
While I don't think it's a great idea.... I don't think it's as bad of an idea as everyone is making it out to be.

After all, this girl isn't 16, or even 18... she's 25. She should be mature enough by now to understand and handle this situation for what it is. Let's look at it this way.

You said she had been attacked before, I'm sure she has (had) a hard time dealing with that and it has likely shaken her trust in men. Her wanting to do this with you, a trusted friend, may be a way of her gaining some of that back. If she were to get wined and dined by some a-hole that was just looking for a one-night-stand and then never heard from again that could destroy any faith she still has left in men at all. I don't know where her head is regarding all of that, but it's a possibility.

Everyone here is saying "losing your virginity is not that big of a deal." Well it's easy to say that when you've already done it. Obviously it's a big deal to her, and for someone who's already 25 it can be embarrassing for her. Would it really be better for her to wait till she "falls in love" with someone before she loses it? Sure there's a remote chance that she'll find THE guy and they live happily ever after. But there's a greater chance of her NOT finding the right guy and still choosing to stay with him because he was the one she lost her virginity to.

Likewise, yes there's a chance she may cling to you and want to expect more. But then you said you're not "that guy" which makes me wonder if maybe you're the one afraid of getting attached? She seems willing to go into this situation not expecting anything from you on the "long term" and if she's serious and honest about that you'll need to be honest with yourself as well. Is that something you can handle?

I'm not saying you should do it, but the two of you need to be honest with each other on this matter, and honest with yourselves. It really all depends on your friendship, is this something that the BOTH of you can handle? None of us here can answer that for you. Good luck, either way.

Thank you for taking the time to write all this and making sence with it . Lol some of these other replies I can't take serious . But ya she was attacked by two men and dragged in the car and only god would have saved her that night and got away "untouched" I was the person she let in on this moment and didn't tell anyone else. So I know she trusts me with everything. Im assuming she knows where my heads at in our friendship and knows I'm the only guy she can trust right now to be the one who an do this and not be a pig and be careful and gentle with her if this goes down. I'm not the one whos scared of possibly commiting to her so that's not the problem. But yea thank you , ur post made most sence to me.

Sep 20 12 10:32 am  Link  Quote 
Model
Kendra Spring Adams
Posts: 1,031
Lincoln, Nebraska, US


Honestly, if you actually weren't that kind of guy, you would have immediately said no and NOT posted this thread.
Sep 20 12 10:34 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


Rachael Bueckert wrote:

*sigh*

This is a really tough one... a really tough one.. because I had that experience. My first time wasn't consensual, and it haunts me. I really wish I had lost it to someone I knew and cared for, and who I knew cared for me. It's a horrible fucking thing to have done to you, even worst when that person is taking even more than just your body.

I say, you have another very long, deep conversation with her about this. Maybe it will be the best thing for her. Maybe not. You will both have to talk about it. And she should carry pepper spray with her or something.

Ohh that's not cool, I'm sorry. Yea it's a tuff thing bc I know quite a few girls who lost it by being raped and molested . And when this friend almost got raped , my blood boiled bc she's probably the sweetest girls I've known and deserves the world . For me this is my problem bc she deserves to find the right guy but her luck in that department is really not there. Shes a 25 yr old  latina virgen  and is just fed up with holding out bc of her continuos luck keeps disappointing her. So I guess I should get her that pepper spray after we're done? Lmao . But thank you for replying to this thread ;0)

Sep 20 12 10:39 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Christopher Hartman
Posts: 53,916
Buena Park, California, US


macshot20 photography wrote:
yea, im kinda scared cuz  we are ok friends and i think has a crush on me but i dont see her like that, she says she trusts me and wants to get it over with so should i be the one to do it or should i not?. obviously im not one of those kinda guys if im asking strangers if i should do it sooooo what should i do? lmfao

Do it.  And be really horrible at.  Then buy her a vibrator.

Sep 20 12 10:47 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


Alec Dealty P2 wrote:
A girl I once dated had lost her v to a rapist, and couldn't talk about it years later. I agree it appears to be a much worse experience than just being raped, mostly because our culture places such a big importance on this one time event.

That said, if she is a v and you don't have feelings for her there is a 99.9% chance she will hate you for life afterwards, even if you are absolutely clear on that up front.

Personally, I think there is an 80% chance that she is not really a v and she just wants to bang you. In that case, you are much less at risk of negative fall out.

ohh man that sucks, but see it would be more damaging mentally more then anything, and my friend almost got raped by two men, so imagining that would be traumatizing .

Sep 20 12 10:50 am  Link  Quote 
Model
Deanna Lindsey
Posts: 634
Houston, Texas, US


macshot20 photography wrote:
she actually got attacked once b4 and got away, and if that was gunna be her first time , that would have traumatized her for life.

That tells me all I need to know.  I'm actually of the opinion that if she's just curious and wants to have sex with someone she trusts to see what it's all about that's not a big deal.  However, it sounds like there's a lot more going on there and that, had she not been attacked, she would probably be making a different choice. 

I vote no.

Sep 20 12 10:51 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Eros Fine Art Photo
Posts: 2,565
Torrance, California, US


"Dear Penthouse Letters,

You won't believe what my 25 year old virgin girl friend asked me today...."


lol

Send me a pic of her.  If she qualifies, I'll take one for the team and be your pinch hitter.  Hell, if she's hot then I'll even give money for a cab ride home afterward. 

Okay, I'm kidding.  In all seriousness, if you can't communicate cleary what the boundaries will be (ie...this is just sex and there are no promises this will happen again...unless you liked it) then don't open that can of worms.  If you can both be mature about it though (something I doubt simply based on the fact this thread was posted in the first place) then rock out with your cock out.
Sep 20 12 10:51 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


Vivus Hussein Denuo wrote:
There are few reasons to turn down nookie that's offered, and you haven't mentioned any.  So, do her.

lmao right?! haha jp yea its more of the ''forbiddon untainted nookie''

Sep 20 12 10:51 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


Christopher Hartman wrote:

Do it.  And be really horrible at.  Then buy her a vibrator.

lmao i dont know how to be bad at it, it would just look like im forcing it.. ;op hahahahaha jp but yea a toy is a good idea tho too

Sep 20 12 10:53 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
photographybyStavros
Posts: 5,395
Bainbridge Island, Washington, US


LitaKita wrote:
You just said it yourself, if you're not that kind of guy, then you're not. If she's a friend of yours, she should know this or at least respect it when you tell her as such. You should feel pretty good that someone would trust you enough to ask something like that of you, but don't do something like that if you don't want to, Especially if you believe she has a crush on you. 

Just my two cents.

To me, 'just to get it over with' isn't a very good reason to do something like this either.. neutral

Hope you get some good advice and stay safe either way.

Sep 20 12 10:56 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


Deanna Lindsey wrote:

That tells me all I need to know.  I'm actually of the opinion that if she's just curious and wants to have sex with someone she trusts to see what it's all about that's not a big deal.  However, it sounds like there's a lot more going on there and that, had she not been attacked, she would probably be making a different choice. 

I vote no.

true true, but theres much more to this then i put on here but its just the overall idea of pursuing such a task to a friend from a friend. just being 25 and a virgin is stressful on its own and maybe shes just done fighting the good fight..

Sep 20 12 10:57 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
ontherocks
Posts: 22,262
Salem, Oregon, US


that's kind of sweet but what happens if she gets pregnant? or falls in love with you? do you want to be her mate?

make sure to use at least two forms of birth control. apparently the pill or condoms by themselves aren't as reliable as people might think. IUD supposedly works better although not completely foolproof.

personally i think she should stop stressing about getting it over with and work on finding a mate. maybe she should consider women as an option.

another question is do guys really like taking someone's virginity? i've heard mixed reviews on that. never had the opportunity myself (those girls would only let me go so far whereas with the bad girls it was like the road was paved and well lit. lol)
Sep 20 12 10:58 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


Eros Fine Art Photo wrote:
"Dear Penthouse Letters,

You won't believe what my 25 year old virgin girl friend asked me today...."


lol

Send me a pic of her.  If she qualifies, I'll take one for the team and be your pinch hitter.  Hell, if she's hot then I'll even give money for a cab ride home afterward. 

Okay, I'm kidding.  In all seriousness, if you can't communicate cleary what the boundaries will be (ie...this is just sex and there are no promises this will happen again...unless you liked it) then don't open that can of worms.  If you can both be mature about it though (something I doubt simply based on the fact this thread was posted in the first place) then rock out with your cock out.

hahahha nice, but you got some points there, communication and setting boundries  to this thing and making sure me and her are on the right page is key.. thanks

Sep 20 12 11:00 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
TRPn Pics
Posts: 10,431
Andrews, North Carolina, US


Maybe we're all missing the bigger picture here. hmm






http://www.gifflix.com/files/818f4b02d13b.gif
Sep 20 12 11:04 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


twoharts wrote:
that's kind of sweet but what happens if she gets pregnant? or falls in love with you? do you want to be her mate?

make sure to use at least two forms of birth control. apparently the pill or condoms by themselves aren't as reliable as people might think. IUD supposedly works better although not completely foolproof.

personally i think she should stop stressing about getting it over with and work on finding a mate. maybe she should consider women as an option.

another question is do guys really like taking someone's virginity? i've heard mixed reviews on that. never had the opportunity myself (those girls would only let me go so far whereas with the bad girls it was like the road was paved and well lit. lol)

no i dont lol, i just see her as a coo friend that asked me to do something special for her, which is something i dont get asked very often lol.  yea i think ill do the rubber and pull out method, she will probably forget to take the pill lmao.
lmfao!!! nice , umm well i dunno either, she will be my first virgin . im thinking it would be nice but a messy clean up and probably be fustraighting bc id wanna go all the way in or fast and she will need baby steps, soooooo i really dont know hahha

Sep 20 12 11:11 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
TRPn Pics
Posts: 10,431
Andrews, North Carolina, US


macshot20 photography wrote:

no i dont lol, i just see her as a coo friend that asked me to do something special for her, which is something i dont get asked very often lol.  yea i think ill do the rubber and pull out method, she will probably forget to take the pill lmao.
lmfao!!! nice , umm well i dunno either, she will be my first virgin . im thinking it would be nice but a messy clean up and probably be fustraighting bc id wanna go all the way in or fast and she will need baby steps, soooooo i really dont know hahha

Dude !

http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111125162443/glee/images/2/21/Smh--4.gif

Sep 20 12 11:13 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
MerrillMedia
Posts: 8,413
New Orleans, Louisiana, US


If you think she has a thing for you, RUN!

Not a good idea in that case - she will immediately view you as the love of her life.
Sep 20 12 11:17 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
TRPn Pics
Posts: 10,431
Andrews, North Carolina, US


MerrillMedia wrote:
If you think she has a thing for you, RUN!

Not a good idea in that case - she will immediately view you as the love of her life.

Especially being a (gasp).....first.

Sep 20 12 11:19 am  Link  Quote 
Model
K Allende
Posts: 14,172
Columbus, Ohio, US


Kendra Spring Adams wrote:
Honestly, if you actually weren't that kind of guy, you would have immediately said no and NOT posted this thread.

True story.

Sep 20 12 11:24 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Eros Fine Art Photo
Posts: 2,565
Torrance, California, US


MerrillMedia wrote:
If you think she has a thing for you, RUN!

Not a good idea in that case - she will immediately view you as the love of her life.

Yes, because it's a well known fact 25 year old women have the emotional maturity of a first grader. 

(end sarcasm)

Sep 20 12 11:46 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
MerrillMedia
Posts: 8,413
New Orleans, Louisiana, US


Eros Fine Art Photo wrote:
Yes, because it's a well known fact 25 year old women have the emotional maturity of a first grader. 

(end sarcasm)

Actually, I have seen quite a few 25 year olds who have the the emotional maturity of a first grader. Some of them hang out in SB.

Sep 20 12 11:48 am  Link  Quote 
Photographer
DG IMAGES
Posts: 393
Las Vegas, Nevada, US


Silly, If you have to ask the question then NO
You say your good friends then another reason to say NO
Are you involved with her? If not then NO
You never did say how old this girl was though, and I also agree if she finds out you did this it will not matter anyway, LOL
Sep 20 12 12:46 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
TRPn Pics
Posts: 10,431
Andrews, North Carolina, US


DG IMAGES wrote:
Silly, If you have to ask the question then NO
You say your good friends then another reason to say NO
Are you involved with her? If not then NO
You never did say how old this girl was though, and I also agree if she finds out you did this it will not matter anyway, LOL

Ummm..... thread title maybe  *shrugs* lol

Sep 20 12 12:53 pm  Link  Quote 
guide forum
Photographer
Rays Fine Art
Posts: 5,995
New York, New York, US


One of the nice things about being A-an old grandfatherly type and B- a nude photographer, is that you are so often in a position where young women get comfortable enough with you to let their hair down.

I find the story completely believable from the things that many women have told me.  Most have said their first experience was anything but pleasant and a good many of them did so to "get it over with". 

Sixty or so years ago, when I was a kid in the conservative Midwest, the deed was often done after a hurried "romance" in which the boy never quite knew what hit him and after which he was unceremoniously dumped.  Today, in these more enlightened times when we are more open about such things, apparently asking a friend to "help you out" is not all that uncommon, particularly if one has gotten to the ripe old age of 20+
Sep 20 12 01:20 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Legacys 7
Posts: 33,782
San Francisco, California, US


Tough call. My take on this. If you are into her (you said that you're not) and her approach had more to do with her being horny and she wants it, then yes. If this is someone that wants to get it out of the way and that's it, attracted to her or not, I wouldn't do it. It has to be something that she really wants to do, due to desire. To me this is like someone that is drunk, comes on to you and you're put on the spot. NO.
Sep 20 12 01:43 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
Paolo Diavolo
Posts: 8,269
Pleasant Hill, California, US


Drew Smith Photography wrote:

You have to have kept the receipt and take it back within 28 days.

ya but they only give you a store credit for an open box, and they didnt have anything else i wanted.

Sep 20 12 01:49 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
All Yours Photography
Posts: 2,272
Toledo, Ohio, US


Presley ONeil wrote:
NOOOOO!

God No..

Jesus. Just no. Haha what good could come out of this? you get laid, once.
& Bad? shit thats endless..... &almost inevitable.

Just tell her youre "not that guy" &let her figure it out on her own.

Not that tough to figure out.  The youngest person in the thread managed to get it.

Sep 20 12 01:56 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


DG IMAGES wrote:
Silly, If you have to ask the question then NO
You say your good friends then another reason to say NO
Are you involved with her? If not then NO
You never did say how old this girl was though, and I also agree if she finds out you did this it will not matter anyway, LOL

lol the name of the thread has her age on it. lol  and she wont... she doesnt know this site haha

Sep 20 12 04:52 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
SPRINGHEEL
Posts: 38,133
Gibraltar, Michigan, US


http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l249/SPRINGHEEL69/tumblr_lg2idyFyj21qdro83o1_400.gif
Sep 20 12 04:53 pm  Link  Quote 
Model
Eryn G
Posts: 6,459
Alma, Colorado, US


All I see when I read the ops posts...

Hunsimdmdim Kthx jkjkjkjkjk. Hahahahahahaha virgin b liek thatss.

hmm

Wut.
Sep 20 12 05:08 pm  Link  Quote 
Photographer
macshot20 photography
Posts: 291
Stockton, California, US


Ok guys I had a good chat with her and told her how I felt and to see if everything was ok, I wanted her to know that we had to be on the same page with this and I didn't want her to hate me if I reject feelings after "the deed was done" . So I guess she shall save it for the man who can give her the love an respect back (hopefully) ..
Sep 20 12 09:01 pm  Link  Quote 
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