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Photographer asking for sex
I have edited this because admin is helping me but for the future..... I am guessing this happens to models sometimes, how do you handle it? May 30 14 12:23 pm Link If he emailed you on here CAM him. May 30 14 12:26 pm Link He tried to add me on here but emailed me on my email so I cannot figure out how to report. May 30 14 12:27 pm Link  Moderator Note!Please open a CAM ( https://www.modelmayhem.com/contactamod ) and include a link to his profile. Tell us exactly what happened in the CAM. We may ask you to forward any email to our mod email... we will have to see what your CAM say's and look at the photographers history. I am very sorry you had this happen to you. Fortunately he did not approach you during a shoot but before in the planning stage. May 30 14 12:31 pm Link christiecreepydolls wrote: Screenshot the emails and open a cam May 30 14 12:34 pm Link christiecreepydolls wrote: Edited wrote: If you haven't already, email him a simple message telling him that you do not want him to contact you anymore by any method. Don't say anything about reasons or anything else... just something along the lines of "Today is mm-dd-yyyy. As of this date I request and require that you no longer contact me via email, telephone, text message, or any other method." May 30 14 12:36 pm Link Oh no, so sorry to hear that! I'm glad he asked via email so you didn't have to meet him. Unfortunately, this is not very unusual, it has happened to me many times, especially when I get offered paid jobs. Just recently I had a shoot with photographer (none of the ones in my portfolio), he seemed to be very happy with the results and offered another one, this time in France. During the first shoot he was trying to kiss me and he was begging me to let him touch my boobs. I told him I don't wish to have psychical contact with him and I thought he understood, after that he was acting professional. The day before our scheduled 2 days shoot in France I asked about accommodation and he said we will be sharing bed, like it was the most obvious thing ever (from what he was saying apparently all his previous models had no problem at all with sleeping in the same bed with him). I told him this is not an option and I will pay for my own room. Then he got pissed off and cancelled everything because he can't work with someone who's got trust issues. Once, I went to a different city for a calendar shoot and after the shoot I was told I had to say ''thank you'' (yes, a special thank you) to the photographer (and there were also a ''director''), when I refused I didn't get paid and they didn't use my pictures. After, the photographer send me an email saying I won't achieve anything, I don't know the industry etc. Not to mention that I was like 16 at that time and they were over 50. Can't count how many times it was suggested to me on the phone or via email that I will have to have sex with someone, I just block them straight away. Even for normal jobs it can happen, I was trying to get a job as a waitress in a restaurant and the owner asked me for a hand job... I was shocked and disgusted. Unfortunately so many women are desperate to get modelling jobs or even TF pictures with good photographers that they will open their legs straight away. Because of that some photographers try their luck- it worked before so why not this time? That makes me appreciate genuine ones even more. Anyway, his lost! And I don't understand why did he call you fat, he was trying to sleep with you so was it supposed to be an insult or what? Ridiculous, disgusting guy. May 30 14 01:00 pm Link christiecreepydolls wrote: I'm sorry to hear that this has happened. It's a rare occurrence, but doesn't make it any easier for you to deal with. I'd say CAM him with a link to his profile and explain what happened, maybe even somehow include any messages that he sent with stuff like that. Also, this is probably a no brainer, but block him. May 30 14 01:04 pm Link I'm sorry this happened and I'm not at all saying I don't believe you, BUT: I think we should be careful accepting screenshots of emails as proof. If it's through MM, obviously that can be verified by MM staff. May 30 14 02:01 pm Link I'm so sorry to hear that happened to you, yuck! I've definitely had similar things happen quite a few times. Once, a photographer refused to let me leave his home studio because he wanted to have sex with me and get me to be his sugar baby so badly. Pushy, insistent, "I can make you feel like nobody ever has" kind of insistent. He was 65+, I was 20, and apparently it's worked on everyone else. Hmm. More than I can count on two hands have been 100 percent professional in e-mails/phone calls only to go all skeeveball as soon as I showed up. Several have assumed I was also an escort and asked me what my rates were for that. When I explained I was just a model, they were all like, "come on, we [photographers] know what you girls really do". Huh? All I've done in the past is either walk out of a shoot or tell other models who ask my honest experience with the photographer. If someone was particularly unnerving, I'll tell them in no uncertain terms that they are not to contact me again. I have no idea why people think they can get away with trying to treat others that way, but the good news is there are far more fantastic, kind, respectful photographers than there are disrespectful ones  May 30 14 03:23 pm Link SPV Photo wrote: I kinda agree. If this was not though MM messaging, this is not an MM issue, and not MM's business. If this person contacted you with that offer though your email that he got somehow (doesn't matter how) then just deal with him like any other creep who isn't a photographer. May 30 14 07:39 pm Link MartaBrixton wrote: Does this really happen that much? May 30 14 07:49 pm Link The Grand Artist wrote: MartaBrixton wrote: MartaBrixton wrote: Does this really happen that much? I'd guess that this is not very unusual, it has happened to [her] many times. But that's just a guess. May 30 14 07:58 pm Link I'm so sorry to hear that, I have been very lucky and no photographer has ever tried that on me, but do your homework and check your reference! I hope you will not experience the same thing ever again. Best, Phan May 30 14 08:33 pm Link How do you handle it in the real world? May 30 14 08:40 pm Link I've met a few models who've been hit on so many times by the photographers that they tell me up front that I have to shut up, shoot them, pay them, and go our own separate ways as quickly as possible. I've met four models like that. One even canceled a rooftop shoot upon arrival as soon as she saw that I was working alone and had no creative crew. She thought it was going to be like that scene in Fame where one of the characters is approached by a filmmaker to do a test shoot, but he turns out to be a pornographer. (Though given that it was the middle of February and we were outside on top of a skyscraper in the middle of downtown Chicago, that sort of thing was impossible to even consider.) It pains me how some photographers are such creeps that the models would rather prefer icemen to genuinely friendly photographers who want to build a strong professional relationship with them rather than try to get into their pants. May 30 14 09:16 pm Link christiecreepydolls wrote: Deal with it the same way when a stranger asking you for sex. May 30 14 09:37 pm Link J O H N A L L A N wrote: what do you mean by the real world? May 31 14 12:25 am Link Phan Nguyen Nguyen wrote: Not online but in real life. May 31 14 05:56 am Link The Grand Artist wrote: Sadly, more often than you might think. I just did a shoot with a model who has an account on here. She was telling me during our shoot that she has had a string of bad luck with photographers hitting on her lately. The most recent of which was with a photographer who is somewhat well respected here in Las Vegas. When she went to do a wardrobe change, he followed her into the restroom while recording video. He said he wanted to shoot her nude while she changed. She asked him to stop several times and eventually he did. When she came out he was taking pictures of her emerging from the restroom and then said for the next set he wanted to find out if he could shoot her with his penis in the photo. She packed and left. May 31 14 02:45 pm Link For some models beauty must be such as everyday struggle and burden it must be quiet a weight they carry having to be on guard. May 31 14 02:48 pm Link Good Egg Productions wrote: I'm going to call bullshit on both of you! May 31 14 03:19 pm Link The Grand Artist wrote: Oh yes it does. May 31 14 03:22 pm Link Believe it or not, it happens the other way around too, at shoots. May 31 14 03:25 pm Link I don't want sex. I'm having too much fun photographing the model!  May 31 14 03:26 pm Link MartaBrixton wrote: Marta, this is what I don't understand. May 31 14 04:30 pm Link Is this thread for real? C'mon honestly! May 31 14 04:40 pm Link The Something Guy wrote: +1 May 31 14 04:48 pm Link 
Photographer Posts: 4288 Amundsen-Scott - permanent station of the US, Unclaimed Sector, Antarctica Michael Zahra wrote: Not as much as I'd like, I can tell you that... May 31 14 05:07 pm Link "Christiecreepydolls" is shocked by other creepy peoples' behavior? May 31 14 05:26 pm Link how many models will it take actually reporting requests for sex before we stop thinking these requests are rare occurrences? May 31 14 05:26 pm Link jesse paulk wrote: ^ May 31 14 05:36 pm Link jesse paulk wrote: There were over 7500 charges made in Atlanta in 2012 (not all female mind you). So what do you suppose MM do about it? May 31 14 05:42 pm Link AJScalzitti wrote: MM does what it can, i was not addressing them( or you), but us, the forum population. especially the ones of us who were all "this is rare" #lolnotallmen May 31 14 05:52 pm Link Kev Lawson wrote: I'm by no means taking sides on this and don't condone it at all. May 31 14 07:15 pm Link John Jebbia wrote: LOL May 31 14 07:17 pm Link derp Jun 01 14 04:11 am Link Yep.... def been hit on by models and asked for sex. So not really hard to imagine any of these stories. I don't think it is illegal to ask for sex...... and as I was told years ago.... "it happens and some people are just waiting to be asked!". I shrugged my shoulders and said "I don't need that kinda rep!". To many points on here though..... if they are still asking then it has probably worked/been received well in the past. Sorry this happened to you but honestly it's probably not the last time it will happen to you on shoot and certainly not the last time it will happen to you in life. Cheers, -troy Jun 01 14 04:26 am Link Unfortunately, it doesn't matter your age, size or experience--folks can act anywhere from unprofessional and inappropriate up to predatory and criminal--have to reduce the risk the best you can. Even though I'm ultra careful--and not a tiny, young woman--have had the skeevies approach me too. Some hints, this old lady has learned along the way (used to work in victim services early in my career and my sister is a prosecutor)--hope they help: If someone stalks you online, use every venue open to you for reporting: * reply and put "Cease and Desist" in the Subject and state clearly you are not interested and s/he needs to not contact you again. * BCC another email you have for history and to clearly show time/date stamp * Report them to your email/isp service provider (check the details of your provider's support info--in some cases, they'll give you an email address to cc on these correspondences.) Then block this email address as abusive. * Report through CAM. * If s/he attempts to get in touch with you again, take this information and file a police report. Also, as a woman who has had a day job in tech sales and marketing for 20+ years where I was typically the only woman on the road "with the boys", some additional notes based on some of the replies: * if you don't know the photographer, interview him/her on phone or in person before you are alone with them in a studio/on site. Listen to your inner BS meter--if they seem skeevy, they are not going to get better. Walk away. * when travelling for a gig (or even for a local one which requires you to invest your time/has expenses), have a legal contract in place that is explicit about what you are being paid for, travel/lodging details etc. and have it executed before you get on site. * if you are staying overnight during a gig, resist the urge to "hang out" with the photog and/or crew or drink on the trip. Alcohol can put you at risk--your defenses are down and folks can easily spike an alcoholic drink. If there is another female model, join forces and have dinner, take a walking tour of the town or something not wrapped around alcohol. If alone, find alternative choices for evening entertainment instead of the bar--cute restaurant (food side) or a movie or local theater for a play. Ask a woman who works at hotel about nice places to go for dinner and how safe is it to wander on your own in area? At worst, get food, take back to room and have a laid back evening in your jammies with the tv. Wishing you all much success--and safety! Catherine Jun 01 14 02:37 pm Link salvatori. wrote: Maybe you aren't handsome or friendly enough Jun 01 14 04:07 pm Link |
